It was Valentine’s Day, and I didn’t have a boyfriend, which I was telling myself was actually pretty nice. The last boyfriend had gotten me a heart-shaped box of chocolates. I don’t like chocolates. I don’t like hearts. He had also written some ill-conceived poetry, comparing my face to the moon, or something. Or maybe he was comparing my boobs to the sun. Whatever. Keep reading »
Concierge. Chignon. Soirée. Saying things in French just makes you seem so fancy, right? Hate to break it to you, Nancy’s, purveyor of fine frozen foods, but your use of “petites bites” isn’t what you think it means. Because the French translation of this is “little dicks.”
Little dicks, big compliments? Well, that’s one way of saying size doesn’t matter.
The next time a guy complains about wearing a condom, flash him this picture — a condom made in 1860. The reusable condom is one of the more esoteric items found at the Ohio Historical Society’s “Controversy” exhibition. The rather life-like condom was made from either sheep skin or sheep intestine, and was, like many condoms of the time, designed to be reused. So yeah, Trojans don’t look so bad now, do they?
I’ve heard of women naming their breasts, but blogger Heidi Leigh took boob play a step further. She had the brilliant idea to dress her breasts up like puppets, or “buppets,” as she calls them. People seemed to enjoy her breast puppetry, so they started submitting their own buppets to her blog, Tit Thinks It’s People. Um, we think she’s onto something here. Apparently, there is way more fun to be had with our boobs. We should put on a buppet show! It would be the breast! Who’s in? Click through to see some of our favorite buppets. And obviously, though these breasts appear in costume, they are still NSFW.
Fact checking time! Mitt Romney hit the campaign trail in Colorado last night and referred to emergency contraception/the morning-after pill as “abortive pills.” This could be because he or his team genuinely doesn’t understand that emergency contraception (Plan B) and the abortion pill (RU-486) are two completely different pills. Or it could be because he’s irresponsibly trying to totally conflate the two for political gain, which I am sure would shock — shock! — you coming from an anti-abortion politician. (Is Mitt anti-abortion this week? I can never keep track!)
Let’s recap, very briefly: The morning-after pill prevents a pregnancy by stopping a woman’s ovaries from releasing eggs — which could be fertilized by the sperm and go implant in the uterus — as well as thinning the lining of a woman’s uterus so a fertilized egg cannot implant. The RU-486 abortion pill, on the other hand, ends an existing pregnancy — as in, the fertilized egg has already implanted in the uterus and a fetus is growing. (I explain it all in more detail in this post.)
See? Two different things, Mitt. Keep reading »
The following piece was originally published on The Fix.
Since I was 19, I’ve worked on and off as a prostitute in New York City. I learned a lot about men during my decade of escorting, from seeing the insides of their apartments and uncensored sexual requests, but it wasn’t until I quit drinking and using drugs three years ago that I began to notice that many of my clients shared a surprising characteristic: They were sober.
As soon as I was looking for the signs, it became obvious that I was seeing a disproportionate amount of recovering addicts. Eventually, I would start bringing up drinking just to test my own hypothesis. Over and over again, I would find out that the guys who were paying me to drool all over their junk had been sober for a decade or two.
And most of them were married, too, of course. Keep reading »
What do you know about sex? Surely there aren’t many of you who would answer “nothing.” Even if you’re the most inexperienced or inept lover of all time (which we’ve been assured you are), you at least have some preconceived notions about sex based on the stories and anecdotes and stand-up comedy you’ve heard over the years.
But here’s the thing — even with all of that going for you, the real and correct answer is still probably “nothing.” Read more…
Even though some conservatives only believe in sex for procreation, that doesn’t stop 53 percent of self-identified Republican women from reaching “the big O” when they get it on. A new study conducted by Match.com found that single conservative Republican ladies reported having more fulfilling sex lives than their left-wing counterparts. Keep reading »
When my friend asked me if I wanted to accompany her to a “Passion Party,” I said “Absolutely!” Whether or not I was in the market for adult toys was beside the point—I’m always in the market for a good laugh.
But surprisingly, what we got was more than a case of the giggles, a taste of chocolate-raspberry flavored lip gloss, and a penis-shaped pen (which I should probably take out of my purse before it falls out and announces itself to my co-workers). We got a lesson in confidence, self-care, and even chemistry, too. Read more …
The Paris Review’s blog has an interesting article up right now about the long and complicated history of librarians and porn. Of all the titles mentioned, “Nympho Librarian” was definitely our favorite. And sure, this book might be fiction, but we’ll be keeping a close eye on our librarian friends from now on, just in case… [Paris Review Daily]