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Funny Girl Sex Guide: Types Of Travel Sex (Part 1!)

Mom, Please Don't Watch!

I’m single which means that, in theory, each day presents the opportunity to get laid by someone new. I don’t usually take advantage of this perk of being single in my every day life, mostly because I’ve deemed the New York City’s entire male population to be unfuckable. I am, however, much, much, much more open to the possibility of hooking up when I’m traveling. Plus, it’s basically a fact that being an out-of-towner has a certain appeal to local dudes who are terrified of any possibility of commitment. Basically, my rolling suitcase and obvious lack of knowledge about local traffic laws have proven to be massive turn-ons. In part one of this episode of Funny Girl Sex Guide, I reveal some types of travel hookups that you’re likely to experience at some point in your life, with examples from my own.

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Dear Prudence Counsels Woman Whose Boyfriend Likes To Initiate Sex After Diarrhea

In today’s Dear Prudence letter, a woman going by the name of “Feeling Dirty” wrote in “grossed out” and “confused” that her boyfriend of two years seems to be turned on every time she poops — especially if it’s of the diarrhea variety. The woman, who mentions that she grew up in a house where bathroom behavior was never discussed, admits that she’s one of those secret poopers, even in her own home, which she shares with her boyfriend, “Ron.” She writes:

“Now that ‘Ron’ and I are living together, I have to divulge certain information on a need to know basis. More specifically, if I have diarrhea. These times I have had to explain, ‘You may not want to go in there for a while.’ The weird thing is, 15 minutes or so after telling him such, Ron initiates sex. I find it gross and confusing. He knows how uncomfortable I feel as it is. This has happened four times so far. He denies a pattern or that it’s unusual. Am I the one being weird about this?”

Keep reading »

This Singing Uterus Will Teach You About The Joys Of Menopause

Be Afraid, Be Very Afraid
This-Singing-Uterus-Will-Teach-You-About-The-Joys-Of-Menopause
Take It Away, Clitoris!

I really don’t know whether to laugh or cry after watching a singing uterus school me about my reproductive future. Women’s menopause health and wellness awareness advocate, Ellen Dolgen, joined forces with comedian Rachel Bloom (who stars as the uterus) and songwriter Jack Dolgen to send women in their 30′s into an anxiety spiral bring a taboo subject to the forefront of discussion.  Keep reading »

A Man Had Sex With A Domino’s Pizza And … Burned His Penis

  • Please note: if you try to “make love to” a Domino’s pizza and burn your penis, you’re probably not getting a refund. Sigh. The perils of pizza sex. [Huffington Post]
  • In honor of the approaching Oscars, here is some sex and dating advice from the many characters played by Matthew McConaughey. Like, “The older you get, the more rules they’re gonna try to make you follow.” Preach, Wooderson! [Em & Lo]
  • An 18-year-old dude charted every time he masturbated for a full year. How enterprising. [Nerve] Keep reading »

The Most Mesmerizing, Soul-Destroying Porno GIF You’ll Ever See (NSFW)

The-Most-Mesmerizing-Porno-GIF-You'll-Ever-See-(NSFW)

You probably suspected that Pandora’s Box of internet porn was wide and vast and although perhaps you were curious enough to peek into the dark corners and catch a glimpse of a woman being gang banged by a group of pterodactyls once, you felt content to keep that box (pardon the word choice) tightly shut. The people at PornMD have done you the favor (?) of opening the box for you and creating a real time, live-scroll of global porno search terms. Trust me, you won’t be able to look…or look away. It’s also likely that you’ll spent the rest of your day alternately contemplating human nature and researching stuff you never even knew existed such as “peeing in leggings,” no categorical ski,” analscreen” and “toilet plunger sex.” Good thing that the live-scroll is clickable and will take you directly to  XXX-rated clips. Or not. After the jump, the live-feed in GIF form. Or you can visit the actual one at your own risk. [Gizmodo] Keep reading »

Nothing Says Romance Like 365 Penis Pics

Nothing Says Romance Like 365 Penis Pics
365 Days Of Penis Art!

In February 2013, when his wife bought a white board, one loving husband committed to christening it daily with drawings of penises. Faithfully, YouTube user 365DaysOfPenises kept his word and shared his artistic vision with the world in the form of a video. He even left a note to his wife: “The real challenge would have been doing this for TWO years.…”

Behold his expertly drawn: dickhawks, dicktopuses, dicktosaurs, dicktopillars, dicktocorns, dick dogs, Dickta Lisa, Dickty Sky, Girl With The Dick Earring, a Dicknorah, the Dicklympics and much, much more. Things got really abstract after the first six months. Seriously, I felt like I saw pop culture through the lens of the penis. This guy is a true Dicasso. [Geekosystem]

3nder Is Like Tinder But For Threesomes, Yay?

3nder Is Like Tinder But For Threesomes, Yay?
How Do You Even Pronounce 3nder?
Dating Don'ts: Tinder Profiles
Dating Don'ts: 9 Tinder Profiles That Made Me Swipe Left
These types of Tinder profiles make women want to swipe left. Read More »

I have the dating app Tinder downloaded on my phone, but I only use it to play a game called “How many times can I swipe left in 60 seconds?” My current record is 44, but that’s because I take it seriously and don’t swipe left on every dude who pops up on the screen. But I don’t ever respond to any of the messages that various “matches” send to me and I have no plans to randomly meet up with someone I met through the site. Call me crazy, but I prefer to judge a stranger on more substantial information than what Tinder provides, which is, at most, a couple factoids and a handful of photos. So I’m really, really not envisioning myself using 3nder, a new app from the makers of Tinder and Grindr (the “gay” precursor to Tinder, FYI), which hopes to make threesomes easier to come by. But that’s me. Maybe this is totally your bag, in which case, you should watch this video, which makes threesomes look super hip and sexy, and cross your fingers this app makes it out of the development stage. But as an aside, how do you even pronounce 3nder? Thrinder? Help me. [Styleite]

Heated Panty Liners: Brilliant Method For Easing Period Pains Or Weird Way To Set Your Vagina On Fire?

Those of us with with a uterus know what it’s like to be desperate for a heating pad to ease the writhing, stabbing pain from menstruation cramps. It turns out, we could go for a little more relief directly at the source —  by way of Korea, there now exist heated panty liners. The blog British Beauty Blogger posted pictures of the pad, which her friend picked up on a trip to Japan. She said the package contains a “heated sachet,” which gets very hot and is not to be worn “directly in contact with your nethers.” I guess it’s not so much a “heated panty liner” as a heated object you wear it underneath a panty liner?  Either way, the whole concept of a heated panty liner seems similar to stuffing those handwarmers that people put in their mittens down your panties.

If any Frisky readers speak Korean, I would love a translation on the packaging of what I think are the suggested uses for a heated panty linter because half of them don’t make any sense from the pictures. Skiing? Sitting on a chair? Holding a baby? I don’t even want to risk any burns on my vag and/or inner thighs, so my only suggested use is laughing at this. [British Beauty Blogger] [Images via British Beauty Blogger]

Turn Your Sex Fantasies Into Reality

sex-fantasy

Whether you’ve been together for two years or sixteen, you know how important passion is in your relationship. But did you know how key fantasies are in having a happy relationship? Being able to communicate your desires to your partner, keep things new and add imagination to sex will do wonders for you — both in the bedroom and outside.

And you’re not alone: About 95% of people report that they have sexual fantasies. According to a study conducted at the University of Granada, “women have pleasant romantic fantasies more frequently than men — a few times a month. Men, however, fantasize more frequently about sexcapades involving “being promiscuous”, “being a swinger”,”participating in an orgy.” Read more on YourTango…

Electric Condoms: Coming Soon To A Penis Near You

  • It looks like a wool sheath, but it’s a prototype of an electro-condom called the “Electric Eel.” That can’t be comfortable to put in a vagina. [Nerve]
  • Everything you wanted to know about penis size and orgasms. [Em&Lo]
  • A shockingly high percentage of men want the women they date to resemble the porn stars they wank to. [Nerve]
  • The totally true tale of a celibate stripper. [Your Tango]
  • This surfer made a penis surf board. Radical or gnarly? [Huffington Post]
  • Want to have a same-sex hookup, but not sure how to go make it happen? Advice for you. [College Candy] Keep reading »
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