If sand fleas, nasty infections, and sunburn weren’t motive enough, getting arrested might be another reason to think twice about sex on the beach. A couple on Bradenton Beach in Florida seemed to think it was totally fine to get it on in full view of dozens of people, including kids, in the middle of the day. Reportedly, people watched, dumbstruck, while Jose “Benny” Caballero and Elissa Alvarez had sex for about 25 minutes. One heroic grandma on the scene got fed up and pulled out her phone to take a video of the couple. According to the epically giggle-worthy news report by Fox 13 Tampa Bay, the unidentified grandmother ”is outraged since her grandchildren saw this, and of course, they started asking questions.” Oh, I’m sure they had plenty of questions. After their first go at it, the couple laid down like nothing had happened and slept for hours. According to the grandma, ”We thought they were dead, but when they woke up, they cuddled for a while, then started into the same thing they did before.” A parent who was also on the beach called the police, who arrived to arrest the two. Caballero and Alvarez were charged with lewd and lascivious behavior and later released on a bond. [Gawker]
”It was devastating because that was someone I was with for a few years. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to fully trust any man again after that. It was just the most hurtful and awful thing that anyone could do to a little girl. I was very young, it wasn’t my fault.”
It’s not often — okay, it’s never — that Paris Hilton inspires sympathy. But in a certain light, you could also look at her as the world’s most famous revenge porn victim. She spoke to the UK’s Telegraph about her DJing career (roll eyes) and addressed how she was affected by that 2004 sex tape. “1 Night In Paris” was apparently laked by her ex-boyfriend/co-star Rick Salomon around the time her reality show “The Simple Life” came out. Some believed that Paris released it herself for publicity. But I believe her that she’s actually vain enough not to release a sex tape in night vision and that this was actually a humiliating experience for her.
It is creepy that Paris refers to herself as “a little girl,” though. She was 23 when that sex tape came out. [Telegraph UK]
British student/artist Eleanor Beth Haswell, 18, made the anatomically correct underthings as part of her senior high school project called “Why Are You So Afraid Of Your Own Anatomy,” about the ways in which women are scared and uncomfortable with their own bodies. But as some of the reaction to the underwear, which labels the various parts of the vulva and vagina, has, uh, underscored, women are not the only ones who can be squicky about their anatomy. “Laughable,” complained one (male) Twitter user. “Something of a buzzkill,” wrote another. And of course, “I just can’t.” Yeah, I bet you can’t, dude. Sadly, this bra and underwear set isn’t available for purchase, otherwise they’d be at the top of my panty drawer, ready to be pulled out the next time someone needed a lesson in female anatomy. (See a few more shots after the jump!) [Buzzfeed] Keep reading »
Last week, women reading the Internet collectively reached for their wallets to check how much cash they had, because there was a fellow lady out there who needed a drink. And that lady was a woman on Reddit who posted a spreadsheet (picked up by Deadspin) that she had just received from her husband.
The spreadsheet had three columns: DATE, SEX? and EXCUSE. The second column was mostly filled with the word “No” and the third column was mostly filled with the wife’s reasons she did not want to have sex that day, like “I’m exhausted” and “You’re too drunk.”
On the Reddit thread of her post, Spreadsheet Wife (username throwwwwaway29) said her husband sent this to her right before she left for a 10-day business trip — and wouldn’t pick up his phone when she called. Assuming this isn’t some Internet prank — always a possibility — the whole shitshow is rude, immature and callous. Keep reading »
My first real game, the one I remember best, was Zork — good, old-fashioned white text on a black background. I was obsessed with it, the challenges intrinsic in playing it, and the mythology attached. I read the books that came with the series obsessively, and even did a school report (sadly not preserved for posterity) on the Underground Empire for a class in school. Infocom ruled my childhood, inspired my imagination, and got me interested in storytelling. Part of what I loved so much about Zork was the lack of a player description. You were an adventurer, and that was that: no gender, no race, none of that mattered. All that mattered was exploration, creativity, and a willingness to accept that sometimes, if you planned poorly, you’d be eaten by a grue. I didn’t even really think about my character, because it was just me, wandering through the map. There was no default. Keep reading »
I was on my way to my Web Marketing class when a girl who looked about my age stopped me to ask me a very strange, life-changing question. She asked me if I watch porn. “Huh?” As a girl, I was taken aback by such a question, but her approach was so natural that I felt compelled to answer honestly: “Yes.”
“Great, would you like to come in for a focus group on women’s porn consumption and masturbation habits?” she asked.
“It pays 50 bucks and food will be provided,” she continued.
“Oh. OK. Sure, I’ll be there.”
A few months after my participation in that focus group, while my classmates and I were all struggling to find our summer internships, I thought back on the experience and how enjoyable it had been. I decided I had nothing to lose by sending in my application to a porn site. Two months later, I started my internship at Sex.com. I had some expectations, but like most unfounded presumptions, the reality was entirely different. Keep reading »
Veronica Chaos is definitely taking ventriloquism into new places — like the bedroom. For the past year, the 26-year-old former stripper has been doing online ventriloquism shows that climax with her having sex with a dummy, “Slappy.”
“He’s bad cop and I’m good cop. He’s the misogynist and I’m the battered wife,” is how she describes their dynamic to The Huffington Post. “The idea is, I put up with him because I love him so much.” Read more on Huffington Post…
No girlfriend? No problem. You can do what one lonely man did and construct a girlfriend in the shower with just a mask, newspaper, some tape and your regular run-of-the-mill handheld shower head. That’s totally normal, right? NO IT’S NOT.
Imgur user tyblazitar has officially planted the seed for all of my nightmares forevermore by sharing with us a step-by-step photo tutorial on how to create a “beautiful girl” out of your shower head, just like his fellow Imgur user ARuFa. Warning: Prepare to maybe poop your pants, because the final result is terrifying.
Check out the photo instruction guide here and get a glimpse of this scary shower girlfriend in action after the jump… Keep reading »
Three forward-thinking women have put their heads together to create the ultimate in lingerie — pretty, stain-resistant underwear meant to help you survive your period without ruined clothes and embarrassing moments. Why didn’t anyone come up with this sooner!?
The panties are called THINX, and they’re the brain child of twin sisters Radha and Miki Agrawal and their friend Antonia Dunbar. After facing one too many public period disasters, the ladies got fed up with the cultural stigma surrounding menstruation — and how that stigma has prevented innovation in the products we use to manage our time of the month. THINX undies are made with “four-layer technology” to prevent leakage, but are still thin enough to feel something like real underwear. They’re offered as hiphuggers, thongs, and even a fancy lacy variety. Keep reading »
Breasts, boobs, tits, tatas, jugs, melons, knockers, rack — there are about as many nicknames as there are ways to show your appreciation for our golden globes. In the immortal words of Simple Minds: “Don’t you forget about me…” Seriously, fellas, you can go down on me for hours, but if you don’t touch my boobs, I won’t be satisfied. Unfortunately, every gal has got a story to tell about some boob hound who did her knockers wrong. So, let’s sit down for a little titty straight talk.
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