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Sex Advice: Should I Go On A Sex Hiatus Post-Baby?

Nookie Know-It-All

“I am a new mother of my fourth child. During the last couple of months of my pregnancy, my husband was uncomfortable having sex with me. I felt rejected, but kind of understood. This led to a good three months of no sex. By the time we DID it, it was awkwardly uncomfortable for me. I still felt like a whale. It is now two months since that first time, and we’re still not at normal speed. We used to have sex at least twice per week. The last time we had sex was three weeks ago. I feel rejected, further, and I have no confidence to initiate anything. I feel lonely and heartbroken. I love him, and I have no intentions of leaving him, but I can’t imagine allowing him to see me naked again. Is it possible to put off sex until I lose more baby-weight? I know that it could boost my confidence to tone up and give my body a good makeover. Can a relationship survive no sex during the time it would take to lose about 30 pounds?”—New Mom In Crisis, via email

Tags: nookie know-it-all, pregnancy, sexpert, sex advice, motherhood, sex hiatus


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Planned Parenthood Talks To Teens, Gets Adult Haters

Teen pregnancy
FoxSearchlight.com

Teenage pregnancy is trendier than metrosexual manscaping.  From celebs like Jamie Lynn Spears to preggers Bristol Palin, the 17-year-old daughter of the Republican VP hopeful, baby bumps on babies are popping up in the most conspicuous places. In the current climate where children are exposed to sexuality through pop culture, Planned Parenthood is more needed than ever.  Yet despite their efforts, they’ve come under fire from conservative groups for their recent campaign, Take Care Down There.  We posted some love for these cheeky PSA’s back in April when the site launched, but after a cross-country summer tour, the safe-sex advocates have been getting crap for their sense of humor.  Planned Parenthood has said they are trying to appeal to their young audience through relatable slang and situations without confusing their messages with fear mongering and scientific lingo.  However, conservative groups are claiming Planned Parenthood isn’t taking the situation seriously by supporting safe-sex and masturbation via comedy sketches that the abstinence-only supported find hokey. But petty arguments aside, with one in four teenage girls already infected with an STD and teen pregnancy on the rise for the first time in almost 15 years, something has got to be done...besides all those teenagers. [ABC News]

Tags: pregnancy, masturbation, teen pregnancy, jamie lynn spears, safe sex, sarah palin, planned parenthood


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Revenge Isn’t So Sweet When It’s An STD

pubic lice
iStockphoto

You can get anything from the Internet, even an STD! RevengeCrabs.com is a site dedicated to selling spurned lovers genital lice, otherwise known as crabs.  If you thought your breakup fight had bite, it’s got nothing on what these lil’ buggers can do once they start snapping at a crotch. The eggs are so cheap and easy to purchase and use, this “settling the score” is sadistic like nothing else we’ve ever seen! And the mad scientists behind this lab have already expanded their line of lice to include shampoo resistant super crabs, bedbugs, and are even working on developing chlamydia and the clap for consumer use. But what could drive someone to go to this kind of extreme, let alone develop a business plan?  These CEO frat bros claim they all got crabs back in college by the same woman and now they want revenge on the world. Even scarier, they promise this kind of payback is totally legal. Right.... Oh yeah, and just to add that extra creep factor, they offer school children tours of their facilities.  We’re itchy just thinking about these buggin’ business dirt bags. [Trend Hunter]

Tags: sex, std, crabs, internet, chlamydia, sti, website


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Sound Off: Ladies Tell Us About Their Self-Love Lives

Self-Love Lives
iStockphoto

Ahh, that little man in the boat. How glad I was to meet you! And I wasn’t alone. While men joking about jerking off, spanking the money, choking the chicken, whatever is par for the course in most locker rooms, women discussing their masturbation habits is far less...known or encouraged. But not any longer! I asked a ton of women for the nitty-gritty on their self-love lives. All the details, after the jump…

Tags: masturbation, self-love, sound off


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Craft Work: DIY Sex Toy

DIY Dildo
iStockphoto

Maybe you’re broke as a joke, maybe you live in the no sex toy sales state of Alabama, maybe you’re just a crafty bitch—but no matter what the reason, you can DIY your own dildo! If our list of household sex toys wasn’t enough, according to Alix Shedd of The Indypendent, using simple items you’ll find at your hardware store, you can tailor your own personal sex toy. Hey, if you build it, they will come!  So here’s how to step up your self-love life in five simple steps…

Tags: masturbation, instructions, crafts, diy, dildo, sex toy, do-it-yourself


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First Time For Everything: Swiping The V-Card

Popping a cherry
iStockphoto

I consider myself one of those lucky girls who lost their virginity before college. I had a typical high school experience; I wasn’t a “queen bee” but I wasn’t at the bottom of the food chain either. My high school boyfriend and I mutually “swiped” each other’s v-cards at sixteen. He was my first love and blah, blah, blah. We decided to stay together even though we were going to separate colleges. It worked out great for the first semester and the mind-blowing, “can’t wait till you take your clothes off” sex every time we saw each other definitely helped the situation.

Tags: virginity, first time for everything, taking virginity, v-card


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First Time For Everything: Sex On The Beach And Other Unlikely Places

From Here To Eternity
SonyPictures.com

Everybody’s talking about British psychoanalyst Brett Kahr’s meaty new tome, Who’s Been Sleeping in Your Head?, based on the largest study of sexual fantasies ever undertaken. Not surprisingly, sex in public ranks high up there. This very important research prompted me to take an oh-so-romantic walk down memory lane to reflect on what were the worst, and best outside of the bedroom sex experiences my slutty self (and “friends”) have indulged in. Some were hot, and a few may illustrate why the best sex is sometimes confined to the sack.

Tags: first time for everything, sex in public, public sex, sex on the beach


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Seven Signs You May Be Dating A Sex Maniac

Phone Sex Addict
iStockphoto

At first, when we found out David Duchovny had checked himself into rehab for sex addiction, we were like, “Damn, that’s kind of hot.” But that was naive. After researching sexual addiction—earlier Susannah Breslin discussed how many think the affliction is a myth—we’re feeling some serious sympathy for his wife of eleven years, actress Tea Leoni. It seems that David’s not just acting sex-crazed on his Showtime series. But how can sex, a natural bodily function, become a disease making headlines? The National Council on Sexual Addiction and Compulsivity has defined sexual addiction as “engaging in persistent and escalating patterns of sexual behavior acted out despite increasing negative consequences to self and others.” Just like drugs and alcohol, some people feel they’re abusing sex and themselves to get a high. But as Breslin points out, even doctors can’t decide if sexual addiction is a real condition or merely a symptom of a larger problem that goes beyond sex. Either way, it’s reeking havoc and wrecking homes. So how can you tell if your man is a slave to his wee man?  Seven signs, after the jump…

Tags: lists, porn, cheating, prostitution, david duchovny, sex addiction, signs


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Is Sex Addiction Real?

Sex Addiction
iStockphoto

All across the Internet, headlines are hollering: “David Duchovny: SEX ADDICT!” According to Duchovny’s camp, the actor checked himself into rehab for sex addiction this week. Some say the shocker is nothing more than a publicity stunt, designed to promote the September 28th premiere of the second season of Showtime’s ”Californication," in which he stars as a writer with a problem keeping his penis in his pants. But considering Duchovny is married to actress Téa Leoni and the father of two, it’s unlikely even a Hollywood actor looking for a ratings boost would go that far.

Tags: david duchovny, sex addiction


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Sound Off: What Would You Do If You Had A Penis For A Day?

To any guys reading this post—this is indeed a conversation most women have in their lifetime with their friends. We are fascinated by that thing dangling between your legs. What it feels like there, how pants fit comfortably, what it’s like when you’re standing at a urinal and are tempted to glance at the dude next to you. And yes, what it feels like to have sex with one of us. So with that in mind, I polled some of the ladies I know to find out what exactly they would do if they had a manhood for a moment, a schlong for a spell, a willie for a week, a d--k for a day—above is the convo that Sexpert Lindsay and I had over IM, and the rest are after the jump. But one thing I’m wondering of you—do guys ever theorize about what they would do if they had a vagina?

Tags: penis, vagina, penis for a day, sound off, d--k for a day


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“The Joy Of Sex” Gets A Woman’s Touch

Joy Of Sex

The Joy of Sex, the groundbreaking tome of the swinging ‘60s and ‘70s, changed the way America felt about fornication.  Originally written by Alex Comfort, it took on taboos like bondage and was all about harnessing the sexual revolution purely for pleasure. Now, over three decades later, it’s new and improved, this time thanks to a woman! Rewritten by the nearly 60-year-old blogger and sexpert Susan Quilliam, she’s given the illicit sex book a much needed dose of estrogen—not mention some serious clit-talk. While the original opus mentioned the oh-so sensitive spot only three times, Quilliam ups the ante to even discussing new trends like phone sex, sex with a baby bump, and strip tease. But in a world facing an AIDS crisis, she’s also shifted some other sexual attitudes. Even though she’s a spinster herself, she’s focused her advice for people in committed, loving relationships. Oh and one other bonus—this new edition has also replaced the outdated drawings of two hairy hippies getting it on with a bunch of modern hotties bumpin’ bottoms. With a twist and a woman’s touch, this book is sure to be a new classic—but you’ll have to wait until it reaches U.S. bookshelves in January 2009. [Times Online]

Tags: sexpert, books, clitoris, guide, alex comfort, the joy of sex, susan quilliam


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Bartering For Sex: The Oldest Trade In The History Of The Universe

Sex for Trade
iStockphoto

CNN has a story up today about people who trade sex for gifts or favors, from a woman who had sex with a guy for two weeks in exchange for a jungle tour in Brazil, to husbands who vow to be handy around the house in exchange for morning nookie. You know what I say to this story? Duh, obviously, and don’t we all? The essence of dating is exchanging sex for dinners, date activities, and expensive wine. Being in a relationship is all about trading a blow job despite “I’m not in the mood honey” because honey cooked an amazing dinner. The trade may not be spoken or out in the open, but it’s there, in your head. And who cares? Dating and relationships are about compromise and reaching a point that is mutually beneficial. The girl in the story may have slept with a guy she didn’t find that attractive because he was being nice enough to give her a jungle tour and so what?  She appreciated the gesture, they had fun and for all the guy knows, she was in the sack with him because she was hot for him. 

Tags: trends, sex for money, sex for favors, sex trade


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Seven Famous Penises In History

Famous Penises
iStockphoto

The penis. So well-known, yet so enigmatic. For many women, the human penis remains one of life’s eternal mysteries. When we here at The Frisky Labs aren’t sitting around talking about our vaginas, we sit around talking about men’s penises. How do they work? Why do they look like that? What is the deal? We may not have answers, but we do have a lot of questions. In the spirit of better understanding this elusive member of the male anatomy, we bring you some of the most notorious phalluses in human history.

Tags: penises, john holmes, history, the little mermaid, rasputin, john wayne bobbitt, napoleon


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The Top Six Excuses For Getting Out Of Sex

Getting Out Of Sex Excuses
iStockphoto

Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t.  Whether he’s a handsome stranger you don’t want to lead to the promise land or your boyfriend trying to gorge on girlfriend pie, here’s how to just say “Later lover.”

Sterilization Screw-Up A simple birth control slip up could cause penis pandemonium.  No dude wants to accidentally make a baby just because he wants to make sweet love.  So, just say you forgot to take the pill and would rather not risk it right now. He’ll probably thank you for protecting both of you!

Tags: lists, birth control, yeast infection, the pill, one night stands, sexual activity, uti


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The Top 11 Songs About Lady Flowers

Lady Flower
iStockphoto

The music industry is dominated by men, so it’s no wonder there’s about 10 bazillion songs all about wiener and not so many about vagina. But I found 11 amazing songs that truly spew pure poetry about patsy, yoni, punani, dew flaps, sugar basin, jam cookie, or whatever else you wanna call it.

Tags: lists, music, lyrics, songs about vaginas, lady flowers


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The Happy Hooker?: Sex Work Is All The Rage

Hooker boots
iStockphoto

Months after the Spitzer scandal broke and call girls became the new black, Radar offers up the strange tale of a wannabe working girl in ”Secrets of a Hipster Hooker.” Written by Jessica Pilot, the feature is an awkward mix of personal narrative and words from the mouths of so-called “hipster hookers.” It begins with Pilot meeting her would-be, thirty-something, Gucci bag-toting madam at a vegan restaurant, a woman who, it turns out, is a “consultant for a major news media organization.”

Tags: prostitution, secret diary of a call girl, sex work, hipster hookers, radar online


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The 8 Sex Toys You Didn’t Realize You Already Have

Homemade sex toys
iStockphoto/Amazon.com

What did women do before vibrators were readily available? They did these common items perfect for keeping house and happy.  Now we understand how housewives get their satisfied smile. After the jump, the hush-hush household tricks of the trade with 10 homemade sex toys you didn’t realize you owned.

Tags: sex toys, vibrators, homemade sex toys, household items


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Dealbreaker: The Silent Type

Guy shushing
iStockphoto

I was newly on the rebound (read: heartbroken), and had been invited by a friend who knew the deal to a downtown hipster party full of sexy, artsy guys. I proceeded to immediately knock back a few free drinks, then flirt my way through the throngs of smart artistes. One struck my fancy, with his Southern drawl, earnest voice, and red hair. He was sweet, and super talented, and cute in a non-overpowering way. I knew he liked me, but he wasn’t putting the hard sell on getting in my pants. So of course I went home with him.

We got to his apartment and tipsily made out, and soon our clothes were off. I got on top of him and we started having sex. Now, I’m a talkative girl whether I’ve been drinking or not, and one of the places I love to run my mouth is in the bedroom. I don’t remember exactly what I said—the sex wasn’t that earth-shattering—but I know there were a few “That feels good”s and whisperings of his name. I’d thought he was having just as good a time as I was, until we talked the next day.

Tags: dealbreaker, dirty talk, silent type


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30 Places To Do It Before You’re 30*

30 places to have sex
iStockphoto

Tags: lists, 30 places to have sex, 30 years old


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Interesting Findings About Men And Sex

The National Institutes of Health funded a large survey of adults between ages 57 and 85, and the results were released on Wednesday. While some of the stuff they “discovered” was pretty predictable (getting erections and having orgasms becomes more difficult with age), there were a few rather interesting findings:

  • Men who have sex no more than once a month were 2.4 times more likely to report the sex was not pleasurable. This could mean 1) that they’re not having sex because it’s not any good anyway, or 2) that these men would be having better sex if they did it more often.
  • Sex is better for men in a satisfying relationship.
  • Men with college degrees were more likely to report pleasurable sex and ease reaching orgasm than those who hadn’t finished high school.
  • Tags: college, erections, satisfying relationships, higher education


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    How To Be A Good Hook-Up

    Kiss on a Post-it
    iStockphoto

    Just like tasting ice cream flavors, sampling sex with a new guy is what being young and single is all about. Sure, you can have your fun, but what do you do when the sun comes up? After a night of hot humpin’, it’s time to get back to your regular bump-and-grind.  Here’s how to fulfill your contract after you’ve sealed the deal….

    1. Set Your Alarm Get up and out!  Unless you know for sure that you’re going to do breakfast, beat the awkward morning-after by waking up before him. Just make sure you say good-bye (see below).

    Tags: kiss, walk of shame, one night stand, date, hook up, dating advice, make-up


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    Five “Philias” That Freak Us Out & Five That Don’t Sound So Bad

    Philias
    Dustinland.com

    I once dated someone that had a thing for pretty feet. It didn’t really bother me because he usually only admired my feet. But sometimes, especially in the summer, he would introduce me to someone and ask, “Doesn’t she have pretty feet?” This would freak me out because beauty is subjective and I didn’t want so-and-so thinking, “Uh, not really.” So today, I came across this really funny diagram of sexual fetishes and started thinking about the ones that aren’t too bad and the ones that would totally freak me out. [Cracked via Tango]

    Tags: lists, fetishes, fetish, sexual behavior, philias


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