Somewhere, last night, a young man stood in his apartment wearing nothing but a condom. He stretched his arms out, closed his eyes, and whispered “if I wear it, they will come. THEN COME AND COME AGAIN.”
The condom was one of dozens he keeps strategically hidden throughout his apartment. He keeps a pile in his nightstand drawer, another pile in the bathroom, another 20 or so are tucked in between couch cushions, books on the bookshelf, and in the cupboard, hidden behind jars of peanut butter.
He considered, briefly, wearing a long string of connected condoms like a bandolier. Keep reading »
A new study found that college guys with higher levels of testosterone (the macho ones!) were more likely to use condoms than their less manly peers. This initially confused researchers because high levels of testosterone are linked to risk-taking. And you’d think that unprotected sex is risky behavior. But no, the young men of today seem to feel that safe sex is the risky move. Why? Because it makes him more popular! Keep reading »
Football player Chad Ochocinco outraged people WHO TYPE ANGRILY IN ALL CAPS this morning when he tweeted a little joke about the pull-out method. No, pulling out is not safe sex, but I don’t take my sex advice from people who’ve competed on “Dancing With The Stars,” anyway. [Twitter]
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“If you come to a live show, it’s a sensory assault. You will leave covered in sweat, beer, glitter, and, just maybe, you’ll get a special edition Ke$ha condom. If it breaks, you have to name your daughter or son after me.”
—Ke$ha tells the BBC that at upcoming concerts, 10,000 specialty Ke$ha condoms will be fired out of cannon at the audience. The condoms are made by Lifestyles and have the word “cannibal” printed on the wrapper. I think we know who to blame if ‘Ke$ha’ shoots to the top of the most popular baby name list in 2011. Oh, and if Aquafresh starts making a whiskey flavored toothpaste in Ke$ha’s honor, I am outta here. [Huffington Post] Keep reading »