• Relationships

Flashback: Revisiting The Post “Does Your Ex ‘Owe’ You Something After A Nasty Breakup?”

flashback copper pots

Last week, I celebrated a BIG birthday: 30! In acknowledgment of the fact that I’ve spent over half of my 20s working at The Frisky, I’m going to reach down deep into to archives and revisit some old posts. I’ll examine what I wrote at the time and how that has or hasn’t changed. If you have any suggestions of old posts you’d like me to revisit, tell me in the comments or shoot me an email at Jessica@TheFrisky.com.

The Post: “Does Your Ex ‘Owe’ You Something After A Nasty Breakup?” Keep reading »

Your Friskyscopes For The Week Of March 24-30, 2014

Aries (March 21-April 19): Time to spread those legs wider, make your smile brighter and use whatever you’ve got to get what you want. Yes, work your inner femme fatale in a more aggressive and obvious way now. Not that it’s nice to manipulate, but the rules are going to be tricky to define now. So, when you’ve got it, flaunt it, as using anything below the belt is not off limits now.

Best Day To Get Lucky: Sunday, March 30 Keep reading »

5 Shocking Realities Of Being Transgender The Media Ignores

I bet that, for most of you, nothing would feel weirder than having your dad or brother tell you he’s now a woman. And for a certain percentage of people, the reaction to that news would be violent. The reality is that the entire concept of transgender people makes folks very uncomfortable, which means we’re simply not talking about it enough.

I’m Amy, a 20-something trans woman living in California. Read more on Cracked…

Are Millennials Really Having Less Sex?

Millennials, What's The Deal?

According to a recent UK study, definitely. It appears that British twentysomethings are banging less than prior generations did — but is that representative of the rest of the world’s millennials too? University College London conducted a National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles (“Natsal”) and found all kinds of fascinating facts about Britain’s sex lives, which are highlighted in this nifty video. One of the more surprising results is the discovery that 16- to 44-year-olds’ sexcapades have decreased steadily throughout the past 20 years. It found that men were having sex an average of 4.9 times per month, and women, 4.8 times per month. This is compared to last decade’s figures of 6.3 and 6.2 times per month, respectively. Keep reading »

The Rudest Baby Shower Behavior We’ve Seen From Pregnant Moms

pregnant-mother-surprise

Bridezillas aren’t the only ones to turn a party into a nightmare. Introducing the Baby Showerzilla – the woman who terrorizes her baby shower guests with her outrageous demands and behavior. Here’s some of the worst real-life examples women have ever seen. Read eight examples of how showerzillas attacked their guests on The Stir…

Planning Your Dream Wedding? Don’t Forget The Donkeys!

There are so many questions to ask yourself if you’re in the process of planning a wedding, but the most important one is: will you be hiring donkeys? According to The Knot, the latest, no-I’m-not-kidding-you wedding trend is to have donkeys at your nuptials.

Apparently, brides and grooms are using donkeys in all sorts of creative ways — from acting as butlers by distributing beers to guests, to transporting the bride down the aisle, to wearing costumes and acting as live scenery. An Arizona company appropriately called Haul N Ass specializes in rentable donkeys for weddings. Their trained asses will cost you $250 an hour, but  Vanessa Rice of Haul N Ass assures you, they will be worth the price of admission. Keep reading »

True Story: An Update On A Psychic Prediction About My Love Life

True Story: An Update On A Psychic Prediction About My Love Life

Back in September of 2011, I wrote about a psychic prediction I received from an astrologer who went by the moniker, The Stargazer. While at a party, I gave him my date of birth and he told me the following about my love life:

“You were with someone who was a lot of fun but not marriage material. You will continue to have fun for the next six months. Things will heat up in the summer of 2013. Either you will meet the man you’re going to marry then or things will turn serious with someone you already know.”

At the time, I remember feeling crestfallen because I had recently been dumped by a guy for not being Jewish enough, and in the scheme of being single, hearing that you’re not going to meet anyone special for another two years sounds like a dating death sentence. Keep reading »

A Great Way To Mourn Guys Who’ve Ghosted

A-Great-Way-To-Mourn-The-Guys-Who've-Ghosted

When your Tinder date stands you up , or God forbid, the guy you’ve been dating disappears into thin air, it can be mind-boggling to try to figure out what went wrong. Closure is an important thing to have when it comes to dating, and since ghosters rarely are able to provide it, you have to find alternative ways to give your feelings a proper burial. (I’ve tried everything from writing an un-sent letter to performing some weird-ass “letting go” ritual. Hey, whatever works.) Add another option to that list: write an obituary for him. Because the best thing for your sanity (and your ego) is to assume that he died and that’s why he’s not returning your multiple calls and text messages. All other options lead directly to self-blame. Buzzfeed made some sample obituaries for hot guys who disappeared accompanied by whimsical illustrations. Finally, a positive way to channel your rage. [Buzzfeed]

Girl Talk: My Rape Ruined My Female Friendships

Assault At Amherst
An account of a sexual assault at Amherst College. Read More »
Rape Accidents
men-drinking
How "rape accidents" persist at frat houses. Read More »
Vanderbilt Rape
vanderbilt football players accused of rape
Vanderbilt football players indicted for alleged sex assault on woman. Read More »
Girl-Talk--My-Rape-Ruined-My-Female-Friendships

In college, I was part of a tight-knit group of young women. There were five of us in the core group. Two were roommates and their room, 513, was our central meeting place. There was a lack of formality when it came to hanging out. It was totally normal to walk right in if the door to 513 wasn’t locked and downright mandatory to stop by if it was propped open. We were honest and comfortable with each other.

Or so I thought.

Rape doesn’t happen the way you think it will. I wasn’t drunk or drugged at a party, no one jumped me after dark while walking home alone; the attack didn’t even start as being physically rough. It was slow, insistent, and shocking. My rape was terrifying, uncomfortable, and incredibly confusing. The physical pain was as bad as the betrayal; the psychological injury of living in the same building as the rapist almost ended me entirely, but I still had my friends, I reasoned, so I was able to keep going with my collegiate career. Keep reading »

Cameron Diaz On Monogamy: “Everyone Will Be Cheated On”

Cameron-Diaz-On-Monogamy--Everyone-Will-Be-Cheated-On

“Everybody has been cheated on, everyone will be cheated on. I can’t fix that, I don’t know how, I don’t have any judgment on anybody, I don’t know how to fix the problem. We are human beings,we are complicated -– you cannot go through life without tallying up a few scars, you cannot go through life unscathed, it’s just what it is. It’s all meant to happen, take your lessons, figure it out, move on.”

Cameron Diaz shares her dismal views about long-term monogamy in OK! Magazine UK. While I do agree that you can’t go through your love life unscathed and that cheating or being cheated on is a common experience, I don’t think it’s necessary to expect that your monogamous partner WILL cheat on you. There are many other alternatives to cheating in committed relationships — breaking up, opening up the relationship, or discussing your urges with your partner without acting on them. Fidelity and what it means to you as a couple is something worth discussing if you’re in it for the long haul. More helpful than preparing yourself to be cheated on, is preparing a contingency plan for how to deal if one partner finds themselves having feelings for someone outside the relationship. [Huffington Post]

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