Over the last few days, a bunch of ink has been spilled discussing the topic of selfies — officially the word of the year! — and whether or not they’re good or bad for women. First, at Slate, Rachel Simmons suggested that selfies are a powerful self-esteem builder for girls. Erin Gloria Ryan at Jezebel took the opposite point of view at Jezebel, writing yesterday selfies are not empowering or feminist and are, in fact, a “cry for help.” Many women on Twitter were angry with her piece, because it failed to recognize that for women who don’t fit the white, cisgender, thin, able-bodied norm, posting selfies can be a radical act. Twitter user ConvergeCollide started the hashtag #feministselfie and encouraged women to start posting their selfies and before you knew it, the topic was trending.
I take a ton of selfies, for a variety of reasons, because most people who take selfies take them for a variety of reasons and not simply because we are A) making a feminist statement or B) crying for help. I take selfies because I used to feel like I was ugly and now I don’t anymore. I take selfies because my dog can’t take pictures of me. I take selfies because I like to spend most of my time alone but I still want to document that I exist. Here are 13 of those selfies, judged on how feminist they are.
We can surely appreciate the appeal of a greased-up, muscular dude with chiseled abs, and we’ve dated our fair share of super skinny hipster guys who liked to steal our skinny jeans, but when it comes down to it, we think chubby guys are where it’s at. From their cozy body heat to the great sex (spoiler alert: extra pounds = extra bounce = extra hot), we can’t get enough. Here’s why, in GIFs, of course! Keep reading »
I’ve always liked The Washington Post‘s advice columnist Amy Dickinson, AKA “Dear Amy,” but after reading her recent response to a homophobic parent, I LOVE her. Here’s the letter:
DEAR AMY: I recently discovered that my son, who is 17, is a homosexual. We are part of a church group and I fear that if people in that group find out they will make fun of me for having a gay child. He won’t listen to reason, and he will not stop being gay. I feel as if he is doing this just to get back at me for forgetting his birthday for the past three years — I have a busy work schedule. Please help him make the right choice in life by not being gay. He won’t listen to me, so maybe he will listen to you. — Feeling Betrayed
Ugh, right? But don’t worry, Amy’s response is on point: Keep reading »
This is our friend Tom. He’s a married guy with tons of relationship experience, and a skilled advice giver who’s here to answer all your pressing sex, dating and relationship questions. Have a query for Tom? Email him at firstname.lastname@example.org! All questions will be posted anonymously, unless otherwise requested.
So I’ve been a friend of this good guy for over 10 years. We’ve always had sexual tension, but I never really gave a thought to it nor did I think we were going to act on it. On a total random drunken night, we had sex. So we decided to go on a date, and it really was no different from any other time we’ve hung out. He said stupid things to me all night like “You’re my dream girl,” and to be honest, I loved it and had a great time. I didn’t realized how much I actually like this guy, until one day – he just stopped calling. He’d make plans, and cancel last minute, which is unlike him. We’ve always been close, and I’ve known FOR YEARS that he is a commitment-phobe. All the years that we’ve been friends, he’s never had a single date. Is this guy genuinely scared of me/relationships or did I just get played by the player-of-all-players? — Alisa
You did not get played. You got “manned.”
Let me tell you something about men. Their deepest, darkest fear is being trapped. It’s constant. They fear it even when there are no traps in sight. Put a man in a wide-open emotional space, with nothing but happy meadows and tweeting birds for miles around, and he’ll still be terrified of some girl popping up yelling, “I’m pregnant and it’s yours!” Keep reading »
The first time someone called me a derogatory name on an internet comment forum, tears stung my eyes like I just got sucker punched. “Drunken slut” was not something I ever expected to be referred to as simply for writing a well-intended, personal essay about my dating life. I was reminded of being blindsided at the mall in 8th grade by a girl in my class I barely knew. She rounded the corner of Sam Goody, and closed in on me with two of her sidekicks. “I’m gonna beat your ass, you whore!” she screamed in my face.
I had barely even kissed a boy. I wasn’t anywhere near ready to process, or even understand, her insult. I called my mom to pick me up and didn’t go back to the mall for two months. Keep reading »
British soul singer Estelle knows a thing about two about dating. Her latest EP, “Love & Happiness Series Waiting To Exhale” is a diary filled with first date experiences. When we spoke to the songstress about her new project, she revealed some of the first date tips that help her get through the jitters. Check out her six quick tips on Hello Beautiful…
It goes without saying that everyone handles conflict differently. People have their default fighting styles, their bad habits, their avoidance tactics, etc. We’ve realized that the way people respond to conflict usually has something to do with their needs — some people need space and time to process, some people need to spew out all their thoughts immediately, some people need to talk about things in a logical way, some people need their emotions validated. What does each zodiac sign need during conflict? Read on to find out! Keep reading »
The stories that live in Craigslist’s Missed Connections board are often the stuff of movies. A user at Reddit found one of its greatest gems this week: a post written by a man looking for the girl he spent Thanksgiving with in 1973. Pass the tissues please!
Read it, after the jump: Keep reading »
Adages, platitudes and mottos can be a little off-putting, not to mention cliche, when applied to real-life situations. The last thing thing you want to hear when you get laid off is, “Everything happens for a reason.” Does it? Well, maybe it does, but keep that to yourself while I’m drowning in the dregs of self-pity trying to figure out how to pay my rent. We think we might have discovered the antidote to stale what-doesn’t-kill-you-makes-you-stronger wisdom and played out lifestyle abbreviations (YOLO, we’re looking at you): advice acronyms. Why? They’re not annoying or overused, and more importantly, the mere mention of an acronym when you’re in a hairy situation reminds you not to take yourself so seriously (DTYSS!). Really, this is key to everything. The minute you DTYSS, you’re on the road to feeling better. Below are some advice acronyms that have soothed us in our lowest moments and revolutionized our way of dealing with unavoidable life crap. Feel free to use any of them or make up your own. Keep reading »