Zergnet: Simply Irresistible
Category Archives: Relationships
For many couples that’ve been going steady for a while, the first big relationship hurdle occurs when they go on vacation together. Chuck Thompson, author of the fantastically hilarious book Smile When You’re Lying, says that there are five very important breakthroughs that occur when taking a vacay together. “Traveling together is really practice for living together or even being married,” he says. “It’s the first time you’re going to be in each others constant company for, let’s say, a week straight. That is much different than seeing someone three times a week or even seeing them everyday for a few hours. It’s a real test of compatibility.” The five travel-induced hurdles that will make or break your relationship, after the jump. Keep reading »
Judy McGuire has been on a lot of bad dates. “How many grains of sand are there on a beach? How many stars in the sky? If I were ever to sit down and count, I’d never leave the house again,” she says. But going out with all those losers provided her with plenty of material for her book, How Not to Date. Plus, it taught her the most decent way to dump someone: “I’m not one of those people who thinks you always have to do it in person, because if I got all dressed up to go meet someone only to get dumped once I got there, I’d be pretty angry,” Judy says. “But if you’ve slept with the person, you either need to do it by phone or in person.” Judy shares her Bad Date Hall of Fame, culled from years of personal experience and hours spent listening to other daters’ horror stories.
The worst line I ever heard on a first (and last) date:
“I usually date women a lot younger than you.” (We were the same age.) He followed that up with the confession that he’d always been sexually attracted to his mother.
Second worst line I ever heard on a first (and last) date:
“HIV doesn’t cause AIDS, and condoms are bs. I’d never use them.”
Worst line I ever delivered:
“Um, no, you can’t kiss me—I have a cold sore. See?”
Second worst line I ever delivered:
“I know I’m kind of fat, but I’m on Weight Watchers and I’ve already lost seven pounds.”
Worst outfit ever worn by a date:
It involved dad jeans and eyeliner. Keep reading »
I’ve had a case of baby fever practically since I was an infant, so the possibility of someday having children has always been a no-brainer, even more than the idea of getting married. Put me in a room with a dozen adults and one youngster, and the child will have my ear all night. When I was freelance writing from home last year, I made extra cash, though not much, babysitting. It was mostly for fun and to put a damper on my crazy baby cravings. One thing I never considered in my non-debate over someday having kids was the possibility that my partner-in-crime might not want them as bad as I did…or even at all. When that became an issue for my fiancé and me long before we even got engaged, rest assured some tears were shed. Keep reading »
I just found this cute new blog that features touching, adorable, mom-written emails sent in by readers. This is such a coincidence because my mom just sent our general Frisky email account some feedback on the site, saying that we should “solicit writing by aspiring women writers with stories and poetry about relationships” which made me laugh because I thought she knew I hated (most) poetry. Next time your mom emails you to remind you to take your vitamins, or your grandma sends you a little note from her AOL account saying that she hears the weather is horrible in your area, head on over to Postcards From Yo Momma and submit them for public consumption. Keep reading »
Bad dates suck. But let’s face it, after a certain length of time, they can be pretty funny in retrospect. In honor of the grand tradition of laughing uproariously at disastrous dates, we’re taking submissions for The Bad Date Hall Of Fame. Send yours to firstname.lastname@example.org and if we put yours up on the site, we’ll send you a pair of Frisky underpants. To get us started, read and weep over the bad date story submitted by reader Julia Tucker, after the jump. Keep reading »
Spray painting a heart onto a tree is kinder than carving one into it.
Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send us a pic at email@example.com. Keep reading »
Last week, I gave the thumbs-up to a piece I had read on Dumb Little Man that advised would-be-lovers to make people love them by making them take care of them. I’ve changed my mind. Sure, it sounds nice in a fairy tale, when this advice may have made sense, but it’s 2008! So I said, “…the exhausting trials of getting a man to love you warrants the easy use of a little Psych 101″ but then I realized that relying on a man for help, and him relying on you to want help from him is vaguely “co-dependent”.
Every time a girl goes bossing her boyfriend around, coddling him into helping her when she’s perfectly capable herself, Elizabeth Cady Stanton rolls around in her grave. So, if you want a dog, go to the pound, don’t make your boyfriend your bitch. Being a damsel in distress is lame and transparent and in the end, being that kind of girl only makes you and your man look bad, feel bad, and act bad(ly). We ladies have ourselves and that is all we were given because that’s all we need to get by. Start realizing all the things you’ve gotten done right by relying on yourself and you’ll attract the right kind of man naturally. And when he finds you, open a pickle jar for him instead! Keep reading »
“I guess you’ll do.” Are most relationships this…boring? I hope not. But in any case, check out this funny/depressing comic sketch by Cleveland comedian Mike Polk. As an engaged person, none of this resonates with me, aside from the fact that I got engaged on New Years and am getting married in a year and a half. Also, I want several dogs. And M. is from Orlando. Umm, weird. Thankfully, we hate camping. We’re saved! [YouTube via Boinkology] Keep reading »
I had been feeling lost without the weekly wisdom (ha) from The Millionaire Matchmaker‘s Patti Stanger. Luckily, there are some exclusive interviews online, including the one above, in which Patti discusses how gay and lesbian dating is different from heterosexual dating. In it, she pontificates on how rich, ugly gay men date hot men, and how lesbians are mostly just looking for their best friend. Does this woman know how to stereotype or what? Keep reading »