Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

The Frisky TV: Admit It, Do You Fart In Front Of Your Significant Other?

The Frisky is full of extremely serious questions about bedroom behavior — like this one: have you ever farted in front of someone you’re boinking? We sent Lori out onto the streets to get answers from regular folk — suffice it to say, some of them would be appalled by my complete lack of shame. Keep reading »

For The Week Of June 23-29, 2008

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Trust your friends when they tell you the truth about your love life. Seems they’ll be no holding back those strong opinions, so keep an open mind. Chances are someone will say just the right magical words that’ll have you seeing your current state of affairs in whole new light — and bringing on drastic changes that’ll have your whole world rejoicing.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Those pesky daddy issues are going to come back to haunt you, but as long as you recognize it, you’ll be A-Ok. You know it; life can be a real bitch when you’re strolling along feeling together and fine, then someone you meet brings out the darkest sides to you that trip you up and make you have to work on yourself. Thankfully, the efforts will up your stock.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Don’t forget you have standards. No matter how horny you get or how bored you feel, waiting it out for what you want is worth its while. Think of this as the universe testing you and seeing how far you’ve come from your recent trials and tribulations — seeing how much you’ve truly learned. If you’ve smartened up, you’ll know nothing, but perfection, could satisfy you.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

When it comes to matters of love or lust, it won’t be easy. Messages will be lost in translation and moody points of view will have you caught in ridiculous power struggles that’ll make you wonder, “What am I doing here?” Yes, this might the time to pack up your bags for a solo getaway or at least away from the oxytocin fountain that’s blinding you.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Your baby better kiss your ass all week because it’ll be your luck that rubs off on him, giving you both a boost of happiness not seen in weeks. Yes, expect a deluge of unexpected gifts, opportunities and/or general fun to come your way for you and a plus one. It’ll be through these debaucheries that you’ll have a revelation: seeing how fab of team you truly make.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

A burst of creative energy, happiness and love hits suddenly, putting you in prime form to attract all sorts of characters. Go ahead, sample them all, as each will offer something special to enjoy. However, this festive vibe also increases fertility — so, unless you want to be called,
“Mom,” stock up on the rubbers.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Your libido gets worked, as this week will have you feeling like a kid in the candy shop with everyone sweet talking you and making you feel gushy emotions easily. However, you’ve been around the block before and you know you’re a sucker for love. So, although you’ll have some interesting interactions, be sure to read the fine print.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Who you’re doing is your business and no matter if others think he’s a jerk or not shouldn’t kill your buzz if you’re having fun. For whomever this person or persons trying to rain on your parade, understand their motives do come from a good place, but also from a bitter place too. So, when they go on their tirades, have compassion — they’re just super horny and totally jealous.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

You’ll have no time for yourself until the end of the week. In the meantime, expect everyone to come whining to you about his or her problems, thinking only you will have a magical solution to lift them from their funk. No, it won’t be sexy and will kill your need to be social. Thankfully you’ll have your toys to keep you company and thank god they never talk back.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Finally, you’ll get to say, “I told you so,” to those losers who didn’t trust you knew what you were talking about. Well, payback is here and the vindication will feel better than ten orgasms on a slow day. Those who thought you were only talking out of your ass will now be duly impressed and working to get into it instead. Too bad for them, suck-ups turn you off.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

If you don’t act selfishly this week, you’re doing a great disservice to yourself. With the sun entering Cancer, this is your time to make outrageous demands and have the extra energy to enforce them. The only drawback is your idealism won’t be so stellar. Luckily, this throe of power will help you fight that feeling, making you feel like the loud mouth top you should be.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Patience and fine-tuning are necessary to save your ego from crumbling apart. Seems you’ll be operating on a way more sensitive level than usual, making you take every comment uttered and action committed personally. While some of this will be your psychic power tuning in, most of it will be your paranoia. Be smart; know how to distinguish between the two.

The Relationship Novice: 5 Things To Know Before Committing

When two people first start dating, they put on their best sides. They reveal only snippets of information to each other, leaving the full story for when the person really gets to know them. Basically, we wait until we have them tangled in our web of niceties to crush them with the sad truth that we are really an awful, despicable person.

All kidding aside, there are some serious issues you need to figure out before you make the plunge and change your Facebook status from “Single” to “In a Relationship.” Here’s a look at 5 potential dealbreakers, and how to spot them. Keep reading »

Love Vandal: Writing On The Wall

We’ve never seen a more beautiful graffiti-ed wall in our lives! [The Gritty And The Pretty]

Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send us a pic at tips@thefrisky.com. Keep reading »

Gay Marriage Legal In CA: Phyllis Lyon & Del Martin Cut The Cake

They did it! Phyllis Lyon and Del Martin, the lesbian couple of 55 years that we wrote about yesterday, were the first gay couple to be married under California’s new law. This video of them cutting the wedding cake got us all verklempt.

Previously: Lesbian Couple of 55 Years Plans To Finally Wed Keep reading »

The Matrimommy: Sometimes A Little Lie Doesn’t Hurt…

When you’re single, there’s not much need for secrets. You live on your own, pay your own bills and make your own decisions because you don’t have to answer to anyone but yourself. If you want that pair of $250 jeans but have no money, who says you can’t charge them? It’s you and only you that will suffer the consequences, so who the heck cares? Marriage, in many ways, means the end of this autonomy. That $250 pair of jeans? Someone else will likely see that you spent that much on them or recognize their presence, if not the Neiman Marcus bag they came in. And, odds are, he or she won’t be too pleased.

Before I got married, I engaged in all sorts of behaviors that I knew were dumb, but I chose to do anyway because I was my own boss. I knew my habitual enjoyment of Marlboro Ultra Lights and shopping extravaganzas completely incongruous with my paychecks were idiotic (The aforementioned jeans story? That was me. Every week.), but I didn’t care enough to stop. Once R. and I got hitched however, I realized I had to. We were living together now – sharing everything, and I knew I couldn’t be self-centered Chelsea anymore. Keep reading »

First Time For Everything: Dating A Good Guy

I have dated losers of all stripes. Degenerate gamblers, pathological liars, cheaters, guys who can’t get it up, nymphomaniacs, older guys, younger guys, short guys, out of shape guys, steroid-pumping in-shape guys, musicians, baby daddies and waiters. I even had a brief affair with a Voice Over Artist. Yes, in a world where you can’t find a boyfriend, you have sex with a man who reads out loud – for a living.

Totally shockingly, in this vast, impressive portfolio of Y chromosome mediocrity, I have always ended up with the shit end of the stick. The common thread that weaves all these winners together (deep-seeded dysfunction aside) is the complete ambiguity that defined my relationship with each of them. We dated, often for months on end, but was he my boyfriend? I would be plagued with the flogging inner monologue of a quiz show – question after question after question. What was he doing when he wasn’t with me? How come he drinks so much? Why does he smell like Chanel No. 5 when I wear Stella McCartney? And where did all those track marks on his arms come from?

You know, typical pseudo-girlfriend type worries. Keep reading »

For The Week Of June 16-22, 2008

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

A power struggle between you and your honey is coming, most likely in regard to your families and/or home situation. Whichever the situation, someone needs to be the bigger person and ante up for the first round of negotiations. Obviously, if he were any kind of gentleman, it should be him, says you, tradition and yes, even the universe.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

There is a lot of satisfaction found in gloating, so when the answers to questions you have been wondering come in and all prove you are indeed the brightest bulb on the block, go ahead and obscenely love your victory. Besides the fact that you earned every second of the spotlight, the added confidence will put you in line for some hot rewards.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

No one ever can predict what you’re thinking behind your spying eyes or where you’re heading off to next. Yes, mystery is your M.O. and that’s what you thrive on, have built your image on and gets you laid the most. Well, times up on this ole trick, at least for now, as switching up your act for a more in your face routine is what’ll keep the onlookers mesmerized.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

This will be one of those weeks that’ll be incredibly amazing with your boo or it’ll suck hard. If things have been going one way, expect the trajectory to stay the same, but move a lot faster. Whichever, you will hit a plateau this week that has you planning ahead for the future in a major way.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Don’t bother resisting who ever it is that you’ve been hanging out with, because his reason to charm is genuine. Besides, why so be hard on yourself? This person only means to bring good into your life and if you want to mess that up, it’ll be up to you. Of course, with the promise of legendary sex and sweet affection, only an absolute tool would refuse.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

There are times in your life you just won’t be able to control what flies out of your mouth, much like this week. The good news is that the universe is on your side and even though you might initially feel some embarrassment over your confession, things will work out in your favor and what you reveal will be just what needs to be said to get you what you desire.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Dealing with power hungry ho’s will tire you out and make you want to kill — and inadvertently, when this side of you comes out, it’ll be the biggest turn on for the one closest to you. You know it; this is your time to show you aren’t going to take crap from anyone. Unfortunately, you might not see results desired, but at the least, you will feel a hell of a lot better from the release.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Free your nastiest fantasies to your honey. The dirtier you get, the more liberating you’ll feel. After all, this is your time to show him who you really are — a depraved sex maniac that’ll go to any lengths to seek out a new thrill and taste a new flavor. Of course, after revealing your mysteries, realize it’s his turn then to show you if he truly is man enough for you.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Some serious conversations are going to go down with you and another, but it won’t be someone too close to you, but more like an acquaintance. Whether this person is someone you want in your pants or not will be more apparent as the days go on and you learn what he is all about. However, realize it’s about the emotion behind the words rather than just what he is saying.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Your light-hearted and jovial attitude is your selling point. However, when you find yourself falling, you seem to switch into acting detached rather than wildly in love. This will cause a problem. This week, there’s a full moon in your partnership house, which means time to cut out this bad habit. Even if it’s not your size, do try to wear your heart on your sleeve.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Everybody loves instant gratification, but now is when you’ll be obsessed with it. Expect someone or something to catch your eye so hard that it’ll make you insane with drive and hope to possess it. Push all you want, but realize that you’re playing with forces beyond your control — which means, put it out there, but draw the line at being creepy.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

A maturity test comes your way when an ex pops back into the scene and old feelings return. However, your current situation will have you keeping it in your pants, but your curiosity will have you crawling up the walls. Sure, love the drama he brings, but settle for the friendship — at least for now.

Poll: Would You Date A Friend’s Ex?

Here’s the deal. A few months ago, I was dating a guy I was really into. One night, at a party, a friend of mine approached us. Except, she didn’t seem to want to talk to me — she flirted with my man while his arm was wrapped around me! She even asked for his email address and then fumbled for a reason — she wanted to add him to her comedy show’s e-blast. I’m so sure — at least wait for the relationship to die before you swoop in like a vulture. But since I didn’t want to cause a Jerry Springer-style scene over it, I shrugged it off and thought, Nice try sweetheart, but he’s leaving with me.

A couple months later, that guy and I broke up and she friended me on Facebook. Feeling guilty for making fun of her and even sillier for holding a grudge on someone who clearly wasn’t a threat, I decided to accept her friendship (on the Internet at least). But Facebook is full of all sorts of TMI — profile picture changes, updates on favorite books, and the one that got me: accepted friend requests. Months after the chick hit on my man — okay, my ex-man — he accepted her friend request as well. I did a little web-stalking and found out that they’re now dating. I’ve always thought that I didn’t care about exes and friends dating (like when Denise Richards hooked up with her friend Heather Locklear’s husband after they split), but now I’m rethinking my position. What’s your verdict? Keep reading »

So I’m Engaged: Not Gonna Be My Father’s Day

One of the things I finally realized about ten months ago — four months before I got engaged — is that one of the main reasons why getting married freaked me out so much, why I always labeled myself “not really a marriage person”, is that it brought up a very difficult problem. Do I invite my dad?

My dad and I aren’t really close, which really isn’t that unusual of an issue for people — but we’re more than just “not close”. Without airing too much of his dirty laundry — and inspiring an unhappy phone call later this evening — I can explain that while I was in college, my dad made some choices that resulted in losing his job, ending relationships with most of his friends, and breaking up his marriage to my mom. Needless to say, our relationship, which had once been very close, was damaged as well, and because he didn’t exactly quickly rebound, apologize, and get his act together (really, still kind of waiting on that), a lot of time passed before I could even consider forgiving him. And I’m pretty sure there’s not enough time in the world to make inviting him to my wedding — let alone playing an integral part — a pleasant option. Keep reading »

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