Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

British Birds In Love

A swan couple in England that has been together for seven years was forced to spend 10 days apart after the male was attacked by a dog. The dog severely injured the poor guy’s left wing, and the swan had to be rescued by firefighters in a boat, treated by a vet, and nursed back to health at a wildlife rescue center. The “cob,” which is the term for a male swan (females are known as “pens”), was then released, and the pair of swans swam toward each other and lovingly rubbed necks as if they had been apart for an eternity. This would be really sweet if a swan hadn’t bitten me (unprovoked!) when I was about four years old. [ShropshireStar] Keep reading »

Dealbreaker: The Super Religious Guy

First date. He comes to my apartment for a boxed wine party a deux, his enthusiasm for Franzia leading me to believe this is the exact person I should be dating. And he’s cute. He’s real cute. Over the course of the evening I find out that he’s smart. He’s a self-proclaimed “literature guy.” He’s funny. He reaches over and pushes aside the hair that’s fallen in my eyes while I’m laughing. I like him. And then he says, “There’s something I need to tell you…”

Ahh! Enter the inevitable dealbreaker. (My, don’t you look familiar!) When he then confesses that he “can’t have sex right now,” I breathe a huge (and embarrassingly audible) sigh of relief. I’m thinking, “No big deal! He’s just a hermaphrodite or something! I’ll learn to love it.” But when I ask why, I find out that no, it’s not something simple like a combo of boy and girl parts down there, it’s much more complicated than that. This guy can’t have sex because, well, he’s very religious. Keep reading »

For The Week Of July 14-20, 2008

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Just because they’re your friends, doesn’t mean they can’t talk out of their asses. Take their opinions with a pinch of salt, but if possible, change up your normal social scene. Hanging with new faces in new places will be way more adventurous, putting you right in line with sexily seedy encounters and clandestine affairs.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

You know you work better in cruise control than in 5th gear. So, as your impatience grows with a bourgeoning relationship, realize that setting up the friendship groundwork is your best play right now. After all, do you really know what you want? No, it’s your ego that’s driving you to this brink of insanity. Slow down your eager beaver, when it’s right, you’ll get some.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

You may not see it right now, but slowly you’re becoming the master of the universe. The power you’ve been craving is slowly saddling up next to you and soon you’ll be able to call the shots in your life the way you like. Although this might be more about your career than love, one will feed off the other and like the laws of attraction will dictate, perfection will be yours.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

You’re all about high ideals. If you can’t have hope, then why even bother? This will mean cleaning out your closets, cell, and computer of that pesky someone that has been weighing you down. Once you rid yourself of the emotional baggage, you’ll see your optimism soar back to working levels and that getting a grip back on yourself is just a trash bag away.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Conversations with your boo will overwhelm you this week, as tables get turned and priorities get rearranged. Although this phase will be more talk than action, know that it’ll be the motivation behind these conversations that mean the most. Let’s just say you have this one wrapped around your pretty lil finger.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

What you see, might not be what you get. While you’ve been putting your efforts in one direction, another road will pop out in front of you and throw you options that’ll have you feeling like the hottest snatch on earth. Know it, love it, and own it, as the selection will be delish and guaranteed to make your head do more than just spin.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Just talking a big game will be more than enough to keep you in the game. With work responsibilities piling up, you’ll hardly have enough time for you. So, while that someone special will be chomping at the bit to get more of you, muster up your best sense of diplomacy and give just a little. If anything, playing the mysterious tease will win you bigger power down the line.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

A slow and sluggish mood will be hitting your brain and you should totally let it ride until the weekend — because by then, spontaneous invites arrive and exciting opportunities to show off your flair will be apparent. Expect to be the life of the party and turn it out everywhere you go, boosting your ego beyond normal proportions and loading up your pocket with numbers.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

This week, your cosmic message is sent to you from The Smiths, “Shyness is nice and
shyness can stop you from doing all the things in life you’d like to…So, if there’s something you’d like to try, if there’s something you’d like to try, ask me I won’t say no, how could I?”
Don’t be your own worst enemy; make the move if you want it.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Stop looping your mind around mysteries of another that you don’t really want to figure out. Instead, take a proactive stance, start transmitting your enigmatic self into the ether and set the pace for the world to revolve around you. What does this mean? Throw a house party this weekend and see what fate brings to your doorstep.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

If you truly mean what you say, then put your money where your mouth is. Whatever the sitch with your man of the hour, you’re going to have to step it up. It’s time to take the trip together or meet the family. Yes, it’s do or die time and whichever that next step, invest into it and make it the moment perfect. The dividends returned will be worth your while.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

A little combative energy never hurt anyone. In fact, it could add a new spice to your love life that’ll make things in the boudoir just that more interesting. With the ball in your court, be creative with how to steer your extra aggression this week, as the planetary alignment inevitably will make you feel 1000xs more headstrong, impatient and uncontrollably passionate.

Flowers Ever Week For A Year: A Brilliant Gift Idea

For his wife’s 29th birthday, a man gave her 52 tiny envelopes each filled with a handwritten love note and enough cash to buy herself fresh flowers. Check out the beautiful blooms she’s bought so far. Gentlemen, this is the basically the sweetest gift ever. If you can’t find the perfect gift for your lady friend and she loves fresh flowers, she will basically be obsessed with you after you do this. I know I would be. [Year of Flowers on Flickr via A Cup Of Jo] Keep reading »

A Place To Meet Your Morally Questionable Match!

For some people the idea of having an affair is super sexy, but also complicated, time consuming, and dangerous. That’s why it should come as no surprise that there are actually matchmaking services out there dedicated to bringing two morally bankrupt, already committed people together. Meet2Cheat and The Ashley Madison Agency both charge pretty reasonable sums to pair up men and women who are dying to stray but too lazy or ugly to make a forbidden love connection with someone they already know. Haven’t they heard of Craigslist? [Via Twentysomething Tales] Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: How Not To Get A Second Date

The unholy trinity of Photoshop, spell check and the Internet mean that even the most illiterate, personality-deficient, hideous troll can land a first date, much to a lady’s disappointment. Landing a second date is the tricky bit, so when you realize you’d like to never see this guy again, there are some tried and true strategies to assure that he decides the first date is also the last. Keep reading »

The Ex Factor: Why It’s Silly To Be Jealous Of Past Girlfriends

The other day, I was telling some stupid story about something ridiculous that happened in college and since my ex-boyfriend was integral to the story, I mentioned that he was there. It gave me some pause because I realized that my exes come up a lot. I don’t think I’m unnaturally obsessed with them, but I’m also not going to sacrifice the punchline to a good story just because I’m scared it’s going to upset my current beau. (Also, I know he’s going to be okay with these mentions, because, duh, he realizes that I’m totally not hung up on these dudes.) Funny thing, though. My boy Andy rarely mentioned his ex-girlfriends. At most, he’ll be like, “Yeah, I’ve been to North Carolina. Asheville’s amazing.” And I have to say, “Who were you with, [insert name of one of his exes]?” Which he either confirms or denies, depending on his mood.

We’ve both hit the point that we know what’s in the past is in the past and not necessarily affecting what we have. But I do wonder if I should be more prudent about my hilarious ex-boyfriend stories. Because even though he doesn’t care, I’m sure he also doesn’t really want to know. Keep reading »

The Top Six Relationship Red Flags

Everyone has their faults…even relationship bloggers who are skilled and rational lovers (ahem, coupled with being a little neurotic). But when you’re with someone, it’s all about understanding and complimenting each other’s strengths and weakness. However, some things are flexible, some things are sticking points and some things are straight up warning signs. Even though it’s hard to keep your eyes open when all you feel is sex and love, turning a blind eye will bite you in the booty eventually. So no matter how in love you are, you gotta look out for red flags. Michael Snayerson wrote some for dudes that still totally apply for us ladies, from rudeness to waiters to dirty underwear. We love that he thinks a man should always offer to pay on the first date, although his aversion to eggs and ketchup may seem a little irrational. To tell our side, we’ve assembled some red flags that are visible even through the sex haze and should not be ignored! All the dirt, after the jump…

Keep reading »

Polyamory Gets A Guidebook

Shortbus, Swingtown, Kinsey, the media does a great job of making polyamory seem sexy. After all, who doesn’t want to get the most bang for their buck? Open relationships sound good in theory, are they really in practice? While most of us seem to have a hard enough time wrangling one man, could we juggle two or three or four? After a couple of seasons of polygamy portrayed in Big Love, we’ve all got curiosities, questions and secret desires. And thankfully Jenny Block has got public answers. A bisexual author, suburban wife and mother, Block has just written what is considered by the polyamorous community to be a ground-breaking autobiographical book Open: Love, Sex, and Life In An Open Marriage. Ms. Block loves her husband and their daughter, but she longed for more sex and wanted some of it to be with women. So, she and her husband decided to boldly go polyamorous and then talk about their experiences. Man, that sounds so healthy and slutty, a rare-ish combination. What’s their secret?! Guess there’s only one way to find out — make Open your required summer reading. [Huffington Post]
Keep reading »

Love Vandal: Look What The Dog Sniffed

[Photo by Emily Freeman]

Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send us a pic at Keep reading »

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