Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

Is Marriage Becoming Obsolete?

In a recent study of 2,691 adults, conducted by social scientists at the Pew Research Center, four in 10 Americans said they believe marriage is becoming obsolete. In 1978, only three out of 10 had the same belief. It would seem in that time, marriage has declined:

“In 1960, 68 percent of American twenty-somethings were married. By 2008, 26 percent were. Among adults of all ages, 72 percent were married in 1960, compared with just over half — 52 percent — in 2008, according to the Pew research.”

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Dear Wendy: “My Ex Hit Me And Now He Wants Me Back”

I started a long-distance (1,500 miles apart) relationship with a wonderful man in August of last year. Things were going great, but suddenly took a turn for the worse in January when he was diagnosed with cancer. I was able to take two semesters off from school to go be his caregiver. We continued to build our relationship and he constantly expressed his gratitude for my being there. Unfortunately, about a month into his treatment, he started to become verbally abusive, and began to pick fights. Months went by, and threats of hitting me turned into actually hitting me, on two occasions. I reached out to his family and friends for support, but he told them I was a crazy liar. I begged him to see a therapist, or to talk to his doctor about the medications and steroids he was on, but he refused. When he was done his last round of chemo and in remission, I ended the relationship, packed my bags and went home. We have stayed in contact, and he surprised me last weekend by driving out to visit me. He spent a few days at my apartment, and was once again the man I fell in love with. He told me that he’d told his family about the abuse, that he loved me, and that he wants to get back together. My friends think I should cut all contact with him, and that he lost his chance to be with me once he hit me. I think his behavior was caused by the drugs and steroids he was on, so my decision isn’t easy. Is it really as cut-and-dry as my friends think, or can I give him a second chance? — Abused Caregiver

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10 Tips For Surviving A Bad Day

Happy Have A Bad Day Day! I realize that doesn’t sound like a nice thing to say, but I’m looking out for your own good. You’re going to have a crappy day today. Don’t worry, I am too, but be happy that it’s Friday and if things aren’t going your way, I’ve got ten surefire tips for surviving a bad day. And don’t worry, the sun will come out tomorrow. You can bet your bottom dollar on it. Keep reading »

10 Tips For Throwing A Family-Free Friendship Thanksgiving

Because my parents live in Europe and I’ve lived in the States for the last 16 years, I’ve had lots of opportunity to indulge in what I call the (mostly) Family-Free Friendship Thanksgiving, a holiday I always look forward to. For the uninitiated, that’s when Thanksgiving turns into a cozy combination of all the best parties you’ve ever been to, but with lots of food and leftovers. Oh, and it gets started mid-afternoon (or earlier, if you enlist pre-festivities help), and a group nap before round two is always appropriate. Sound awesome? It is. But if you’re hosting, it can also be a little stressful. So, after the jump, 10 tips to help keep things manageable, fun, and drama-free — just like Thanksgiving should always be. Keep reading »

Did Your Mom Prepare You For Your Period?

In my middle school years, I learned about the menstrual cycle the same way I think most of my girlfriends did — through biology class, Judy Blume books and gossip. My mom told me zilch. My older sister prepared me for nada. Of course, parents these days, a generation later, are much more proactive in talking to their kids about sexuality, and at an early age, well before puberty hits — which I’m pretty sure is a good thing. On Psychology Today’s “Owning Pink” blog this week, Dr. Lissa Rankin has 12 tips for how to prepare a daughter for maturing, including “Take her on a tour of her body” and “Give her permission to tell you anything.” Wow, if I had gotten one such tip from my mom in the mid ’80s, I probably would have felt less shy about my changing body.

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Frisky Q&A: Judge Lynn Toler On “Divorce Court,” Relationship Red Flags, And Settling

Judge Lynn Toler has practiced law for more than two decades, but her legal career has led her down a path few of her peers have traveled. She was elected judge of the Cleveland Heights Municipal Court at the age of 33, and while on the bench, she worked with several organizations focusing on battered women and domestic violence. In 2001, Judge Toler became the host of “Power of Attorney,” but you probably know her best as the judge on “Divorce Court,” a position she’s held since 2006.

Now, I’d be lying if I didn’t say I questioned Judge Toler’s abilities when I noticed my beloved Judge Mablean Ephraim was no longer on the “Divorce Court” bench. But I quickly realized that Judge Toler heard her cases with genuine concern and interest, and offered insight and practical solutions, when possible, for the couples’ problems. She truly is a fair and impartial counselor. So I was really excited to speak with Judge Toler who, along with having an extensive legal and academic career, has also written two books, My Mother’s Rules: A Practical Guide to Becoming an Emotional Genius and Put It in Writing!: Creating Agreements Between Family and Friends, co-authored with Deborah Hutchison.

Keep reading to learn about her craziest experiences on “Divorce Court,” including the time Gary Coleman was a guest. Plus, the relationship red flags no one should ignore, and whether it’s OK to settle with a man who isn’t necessarily on your career and education level. Keep reading »

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