Wasn’t it fun sluttin’ around? If you just agreed with that statement, in the past tense, well, girl, you just might need to read this list. Because you know you’re ready to settle down when … Keep reading »
Dear Single Self,
Hi. How are you this holiday season? Feeling a little hopeless? Downtrodden perhaps? Frustrated? Bitter? A little panicked about turning 32 with no potential prospects on the horizon? Feeling like a big, fat failure in the relationship department? Feeling like fate may have cheated you? I thought so. I’ve come with some words of advice: BE PATIENT, YOU PSYCHO. Keep reading »
Men would rather give than receive. Keep this in mind, ladies, as you freak out, panic, and wring your hands over what to get your beloved for Christmas. Around this time of year, I offer my services to various female friends who are all on maddening quests to buy their boyfriends and their husbands the perfect gift. These women are driven partly out of love, and partly because they feel they have to top the gifts their husbands and boyfriends have gotten them in the past. These gifts were, of course, exactly what the women wanted, and they were either cleverly hidden or extravagantly wrapped.
The secret to buying a woman the “perfect” gift, of course, is simple. You listen to her. Keep reading »
I’ve accomplished a few really great things in my life — losing 100 pounds, getting sober‚ but I’m not sure anything has been as personally satisfying as the day that I had a Missed Connection posted about me.
If you’re not familiar, Missed Connections is the section on Craigslist where dudes post about hot girls they saw but were too afraid to talk to, and vice-versa. The idea of being chosen, spotted out of all the rest as uniquely attractive and compelling is like a low-rent fairytale that takes place on the R train instead of in a castle. Keep reading »
When you think about it, all the decadence and pleasure wrapped up in Christmas make it a rather sexy holiday. So many yuletide activities—eating chocolates, spending time in front of a roaring fire in your pajamas, gift-giving—naturally lead to romantic moments. At least they do in holiday movies like “When Harry Met Sally,” “Love, Actually” and “The Family Stone,” where falling in love is the true Christmas miracle. If you’re already in love, though, how do you rev up the Christmastime passion? We can think of at least 10 ways for you and your partner to put the x in your X-MAS this year. Keep reading »