Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

The Terrible (But True) Reality Of Facebook Relationship Schadenfreude

I’m not going to lie: I’m in post-breakup emotional triage mode. This means I notice more than ever when other people are wearing wedding rings, and whether or not their Facebook status says “single” or “in a relationship.” I guess it’s because my heart is feeling so raw and scarred that I am especially attune to these things. Something awful I have to admit: It makes me feel slightly better when I learn that a couple I know has broken up. I’m not talking close friends — of course I feel horrible for them and want to do everything in my power to make them feel better. I mean those friends who are more acquaintances — who I know more about through their random Facebook status updates than anything else. I wouldn’t wish relationship problems on anyone, of course, but when I see that someone else is going through a breakup I feel less alone.

Why is this? Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “How Can I Let Guys Know I Want To Befriend Them Not Date Them?”

I recently moved out of the country, and am in the process of making new friends. Every so often a new male stranger will strike up conversation with me. Since I’m new here and could use as many friends as possible, I’m always receptive and try to be engaging. However, it always reaches the point where the guy will ask for my number. Unfortunately, nine times out of 10 I’m not really into him enough to date him — rather I’d be more interested in being friends. I’m finding that by engaging in conversation with them, they think I’m flirting or somehow into them, and that later when I say I’m not, they think I’m a bitch. How can I let them know right away that I’m not interested in dating them, without hurting their ego and immediately ruining the possibility of becoming friends? — New Girl in Town

Keep reading »

“Charity Sex”: During The Holidays, Should Sex Be Treated As A Gift?

Here’s a curious article over at Fox News, “Charity Sex: The Gift That Keeps On Giving.” “Charity sex” (not to be confused with “pity sex”) is, according to the author, “a gift you give to your partner, and to yourself. Maybe you do it because he’s all wound up, and sex relaxes him. Maybe you do it because she’s feeling a little down, and sex gives her a boost … ” For now I’m going to ignore the other parts of the article that go on to advise that while engaging in charity sex you should count on “faking it until you make it” (as in trying to force yourself to get into the mood) and forgetting about having an amazing orgasm. Instead, let’s look at the idea of sexual gifting (“So this holiday season, don’t be a sexual scrooge. Give the gift of charity sex!”). In response to the article, one like-minded blogger over at Cafe Mom begs men to pretend they’re broke so as to get “creative” with their gifts and give the ultimately free present of a go in the sack. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy Updates: “Real World Weary” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Real World Weary,” a recent college grad who found herself underemployed and with a suddenly depleted social circle as her friends found jobs elsewhere and moved away.

“I feel disconnected and lost, like everyone’s moving forward with their lives and I’m stuck in place. [...] My mom keeps assuring me that when I get a job everything will fall into place and my Grand Adventure will begin. In the meantime, how do I regain my sanity and my social life?”

After the jump, find out if she’s managed to regain her sanity and social life and if her “Grand Adventure” has finally begun. Keep reading »

Stop Doing That On Facebook

What are the 22 dumbest things people do on Facebook? What are the things on Facebook that you absolutely must not do, or be considered a fool? How can you be on Facebook without regrets?

Find out Keep reading »

Dater X: Feeling Attracted To Someone Who Isn’t That Attractive

What I’m about to say isn’t going to make you love me. It isn’t PC, and it certainly wouldn’t get high marks from the judges in a beauty pageant question and answer round. It is shallow, and a thing that none of us are supposed to say. But it is also honest:

Looks matter to me. Sometimes a lot. Keep reading »

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