Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

First-Date Foods That Take Romance off the Menu

Let’s be honest—first dates are horrible and humiliating experiences. Trying to do and say all the right things so that the other person doesn’t think you’re a complete freak is exhausting and no one likes trying to make small talk with a virtual stranger, no matter how good looking he or she might be. In fact, the cuter someone is, the more pressure there is to make a good first impression. Do make good jokes; don’t bring up politics or religion. Do wear a flattering yet appropriate outfit; don’t dress like a castoff from “Rock of Love.” Keep reading »

For The Week Of April 6-12, 2009

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

As the sign of efficiency, you tend to just assume the job of caretaker, navigator, events coordinator, etc. Hell honey, that is no way to live! Lucky for you, your baby is going to see it that way too and decide to get off his lazy little entitled butt (and without being told too) and work up a nice surprise for you, as in showing that he’s in for the ride too.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

You’re a true romantic and god knows, everyone loves you for it. However, life isn’t working so great from that point of view, which means you’re going to have to kick a little more ass to get things going in the direction you want them to be in. Yes, this means dealing with those daily little responsibilities that get in the way of daydreaming.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Whoever is the one that is closest to you will be the one that’ll reveal many more thoughts and feelings inside them than you ever suspected was brewing behind that placid façade. Yes, emotions will be running high this week as your comfort zone gets shaken up with a little more fire, which if wielded properly will heat you up to prime tasting temperatures.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Your caution will be on, as things you hear and feelings you have will be slowing you down to question the current scene you are in. Not to say you will be horrified, but with life having steamrolled you out into the place you are now, it’s been a while since you’ve had any real time to collect yourself — this week though, tune yourself back to full sharpness.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

No matter what your boo says to you, you’re the one with the brains in this relationship and it’s you that will have to also deal with your current dilemma and digging yourself out from the wreckage. Thankfully, he’ll be on board for whatever you have on the agenda — as he should have been all along.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

As smart as you think you are, your baby isn’t going to be buying any of your reasons or ideas for future plans right off the bat. Yes, this week is all about standstills, creating all sorts of aggravating and cheeky tensions. So, if you’re as bright as you think you are, twist this power for your gain, to get what you want and prove who the real master is.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Your mind will be floating on a marshmallow cloud and all will seem dreamy and creamy, as love is the drug that takes you higher and higher. No matter what all the naysayers have to say, screw ‘em! This is your time to feel so pretty and even if your world comes crashing down soon after, this moment of bliss would still be worth it.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

You’ve made your mistakes, now, time to deal with them. If this means a little groveling, well that might just be the ticket to turn on that special someone that you’ve wronged in that tingly way that’ll make them swoon with a glimmer of hope for you. However, fate is on patrol and to truly get back into the game, it’s going to take more than just fast fixes, but true patience.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

You don’t have to have all the answers all the time, but if you can just flub it and sound like you can hold your own, for now, that is all that will be required of you. Yes, efficiency is the theme and as long as you can keep the motion in a forward direction, then karma will pick up and shuffle you along onto the right path accordingly. You know it, just look pretty.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

You’re no dummy and for that, accept that when someone cute crosses your path with no game, it means no potential. Yes, as sad as it is, you’re way past just getting off on one-dimensional hotness. While it might be fun to string it along, why waste the time? There are so many better ways to spend your time than feeding your ego on empty calories — like feeding your wallet.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Get ready for a deluge of emotions you’ve been putting off to finally hit you and throw your balance majorly off. Instead of throwing yourself a grand pity party though, use it to resort your mind and get your priorities back in order — and remembering you have friends, because it goes, true love isn’t about only playing master and servant.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Sweet promises have a way of hypnotizing you and leading you to follow wherever those sounds are coming from. This week though, a major pause is going to be happening as you size up the actions versus the words, and it might seem that the equation won’t balance out in your favor, which only means one thing — taking back control big time!

Dating Weary? How A Matchmaker Can Help

Ten years ago, former New York fashion model and girl about town Christie Nightingale was looking for a career change. She’d always done well at parties, was an ace at networking and had successfully set up several friends on dates. She clearly had the skills to be a matchmaker, but it wasn’t until a bona fide cupid family member encouraged her to investigate the field that she began to see it as a professional option for herself. Keep reading »

A Father’s Blessing: Sexist Tradition Or A Sign Of Respect?

Over on AskMen.com there’s this article all about the importance of asking a father’s permission for his daughter’s hand in marriage, a tradition I guess I wrongly assumed was as relevant as outhouses and chastity belts. According to the article, “while the traditional reasons for asking are now obsolete, popping the question to [a woman’s] father is a sign of respect and should be thought out and prepared for.” The writer (a woman) gives some tips for overcoming any anxieties a guy may have for “popping the question” (ew) to his girl’s dad. Keep reading »

Top Ten Things A Woman Never Wants To See In A Guy’s Apartment

So you had a great first date with a guy and so far, date #2 is going really well. He looks good, you feel great, conversation is flowing; maybe you’ll even go back to his place afterward if he invites you over. Let’s just hope he doesn’t have any unpleasant surprises there ready to kill the mood faster than you can say, “I’m in the middle of a herpes outbreak.” After the jump, the top ten things a woman never wants to see in a guy’s apartment. Keep reading »

Dating Amelia: The Deal With Chicken Parm

For the last few months I’ve been seeing someone – Chicken Parm, as he’s been referred to a few times already — that I met on the online dating site OK Cupid. I signed up for the site on a whim on New Years Day, as I was recovering from my hangover. New Years Eve was the last in a series of breakup milestones, as it would have been my fifth anniversary with my ex, and the first anniversary of our engagement.

I signed up for online dating because I felt officially ready to date again and what better place to find likeminded men than on an online dating site?! Chicken Parm sent me a message and his profile instantly intrigued me. Of the three adjectives he used to describe himself, one of them was “hungry.” I had wanted to describe myself as hungry too, but balked out of fear that it would imply I was hiding a huge ass beneath my head shot. His taste in music was a mix of artists I loved and stuff I’d never heard of, and a lot of hip-hop, which I adore. He was cute and he tanned well. Reply!
Keep reading »

Can Breaking Up Literally Break Our Hearts?

There’s a pivotal moment in an episode of “The Simpsons” that has always stood out in my memory. When Lisa tells Ralph Wiggum she doesn’t want to be his girlfriend, his face scrunches in agony and he clutches his heart as if it’s literally breaking. I remember giggling at the exaggeration and then years later when my own heart got broken, I put my hand to my chest and felt his pain. Keep reading »

Would You Wear A Button That Signifies You’re Single?

A “dating entrepreneur” from Australia has invented something he hopes will make it much easier for singles to approach one another. It’s called a “singles identification badge,” or, um, a button for short. The button costs $22.95, has the url of a dating site printed on it, and gets one access to online forums where people can organize meet-ups with others who share similar interests, kind of like that site called, you know, Meetup, which happens to be free. Evan Diacopolous, the 35-year-old behind the idea explains the button is like a “subtle and unobtrusive” sign that says, “’Hey I’m single, I’m looking for romance, don’t be afraid to come up and talk to me.” I used a similar sign pretty successfully when I was single — it was called “eye contact and a smile.”

Diacopolous hasn’t had many people sign buy the button and the service yet, but he has high hopes in that in “two or three years time, we’ll have a quarter of single people wearing the badge.” Yeah, good luck with that. [News.com.au] Keep reading »

Should People Vow To Have Regular Sex When They Marry?

In a recent Savage Love column, Dan Savage made a pretty provocative assertion that “when we marry, we’re signing up to f**k someone at least semiregularly for decades. Not interested in f**king? Don’t marry.” He was responding to a letter from a woman whose husband, despite jerking off to porn three times a week, only had “quasi-forced, strictly missionary” sex with her “at most three times a year.” With an unsatisfied “sex drive of a 16-year-old boy,” she said she was at the point that she was ready to go f**k “a minor-league soccer team.” Savage’s response? She should!

Keep reading »

Dating Don’ts: How NOT To Handle An Age Difference

In my twenties, I dated a guy who was 12 years older than me. In my thirties, I went in the other direction, dating a dude 11 years my junior. (Don’t you dare call me a cougar!) Although both ended rather badly, I feel like that while the gaping age difference didn’t directly cause either relationship’s demise, it certainly didn’t help. Mostly because I wasn’t very graceful about handling it.

So, learn from my mistakes. Whichever way your May/December relationship skews, there are certain pitfalls you should do your best to avoid. Keep reading »

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