Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

Dealbreaker: The Dirty Talker

How To Talk Dirty
Guys love a filthy mouth. Read More »
That's Dirty Talk?
Romantic dirty talk has no place in the bedroom. Read More »
Help!
My guy won't stop talking dirty! Read More »

After a slew of flings that consisted of more games than the World Cup, I was practically in heaven when I met Jake – an intelligent, successful, Southern gentleman who eerily resembled New York Mets heartthrob David Wright. Keep reading »

For The Week Of April 18-24, 2011

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Sexual intensity will hit a new high, as the intrigue that’s building between you and another is crazy hot! Admit there is a strong connection happening and jump in — and forget sorting out the longevity of this situation, as that isn’t the concern now. Instead, see this as an opportunity to learn the true depths of your passion and feel this moment openly.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Two heads will be better than one right now, so don’t try to do anything solo, as the results will only be half of what you can get. This can mean anything too, not just love, but whatever you have happening with money and career too. Sure, this might mean letting go of some of your trust issues, but once you reap the rewards, you’ll ultimately learn your most valuable lesson of all.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

On one hand, you’ll be feeling recharged and wanting to get your life in order like a lean machine. On the other hand, you’ll be feeling as if you just want to curl up in your home and veg out as if you were the last person on earth. Luckily, you’re a girl that can juggle a few mindsets at once. However, this week, be aware the mood swings will be just a little bit bigger.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Thankfully, your honey isn’t a freak without any friends. However, being that he is so popular, it can make it difficult for him to always be there for you. This week you’ll need a few extra strokes to your ego, but it won’t be so easy to gain. So, instead of getting passive-aggressive, be ready to charm everyone around him, as this will be the way to get his worship back onto you.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Get ready with a little song and dance, as it’ll be the only way to quell drama at home this coming week. Yes, forget trying to fight the madness, because it won’t be worth it. Your best plan of attack now is to deflect and to do the unexpected — as in be ridiculous. Sure, that other will question your sanity, but rather that than aggravate you with their anger.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Yes, you have passive aggressive tendencies, but this week, use them in a more antagonistic manner, as in picking fights with your honey to stimulate conversation. Sure, it’s a weird way to go about things, but then again, they should know this about you and if they play properly, expect some interesting conversations to suddenly spark this week.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Listen to your impulses, as they’ll reveal all that is missing in your life. That’s right, you aren’t crazy, so pay attention, as everything you feel will have significance. If your own subconscious barking loudly isn’t going to get the message through to you, nothing else will … and, well, if that is the case, then perhaps you really do love the drama…

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

Your confidence will be exorbitantly high and a new sense of optimism will take over. Forget questioning this feeling of elation, as it will feel like a miracle — only its consequences should matter now. You’ll have a clearer sense of who you are and how to fully appreciate those around you, despite their epic flaws. Yes, blinding love for everyone today!

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Being a total sweetie is something you can’t help; that’s just the way you are. However, this week, you’re going to have to learn how to toughen up and make some boundaries. Your time will be scarce and there’ll be more than a few timesuckers who will cross your path that can talk a bigger game than they can play. So, beware!

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

You don’t have to go any faster than you want to. So, as a new friendship starts burgeoning in an unlikely place, take it for what it is and don’t get ahead of yourself. Although you do like getting lost in daydreams, as they tend to motivate you, this time around, keep it to yourself. If surprises are in store, let that other spring them, as for now, just looking pretty is good enough.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

You can’t help who you fall in love with. So, as an odd attraction starts to form, suck it up and enjoy the ride into the great unknown. Why bother with questions, as all they do is sabotage you? Sure, it may not appear to be what you are used to, but considering this is a new day and age, this might be the time to allow fate to teach you a new thing or two.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Let the fireworks begin, as far out fantasies will be within an arm’s length! Yes, love, passion, excitement and spontaneity will all be on your side, so don’t be scared to express yourself and let your heart do the talking. Lovely exchanges are destined now, and the more you share, the sweeter they’ll get, as this is the time when your instincts will prove to be right on target.

The Dos And Don’ts Of Dealing With The Ex

So I’m sure by now you’re all completely over the whole royal wedding thing.You’re tired of the wedding plans and the photos and the guest lists and the entire country of England. I get it. But I’m going to bring it up one last time because I just can’t seem to wrap my head around this one concept.

According to sources, the prince and his blushing bride will be inviting six of their exes to the wedding. (Two of hers. Four of his.) And apparently there’s some sort of etiquette behind this that requires them to do so. But I mean, come on. I know they’re royalty and all and they don’t have much of a choice, but is this something the rest of us are going to have to do as well? I hope not. Because I definitely won’t be inviting my exes anywhere. I don’t even want to see them at the coffee shop never mind at the rehearsal dinner…

This train of thought of course, got me thinking about my own ex encounters, which had me cringing and triumphing at each one in turn. And this of course had me thinking about the dos and don’ts of ex-boyfriends, and that, of course, is how you wound up with this list. Read more… Keep reading »

Sleeping On The Couch

I yawn, rest my head on my pillow, roll on my side and close my eyes. “Knee,” I say to my husband. He flutters his eyes open and grunts an “I’m sleeping” noise. “Your knee, my love, is jabbing into my back. Can you move it?” As he readjusts his position, he rests his arm on my feet — Oy, this is even more uncomfortable. I tap my feet against his bicep to get his attention. “Your arm,” I tell him. “It’s resting on my feet.”

“Where else can I put it?” he asks. Keep reading »

The Elusive Facebook Poke, Decoded

Click here for larger image

Finally, my least favorite form of electronic communication has been demystified. I never understood the point of “poking” on Facebook. If you want to talk to me, why not just send me a message or write on my wall? It seems like a whole lot of trouble for nothing, considering I’ve never returned a Facebook poke in my life. I guess I just didn’t know how to respond. Do you return a poke with a poke? A message? Too confusing. This makes things a whole lot clearer. [I Love Charts] Keep reading »

Girl Talk: My Sister Taught Me How To Masturbate

Masturbation Myths
Dr. V dispels some common self love lies. Read More »

I was 14 and I was having slippery feelings. I was having them for Roelle, the sophomore with giant tits who told me she liked my shirt, before crawling under a wool blanket to make out with her boyfriend on the front lawn of the high school. I was having them for Eleanor, who told me it was her dad’s birthday the three times I asked her to hang out. I was even having them for Colleen, who was only 4’7”, and who ate her height in Taco Bell tacos, and who therefore smelled like she had been bathing in a vat of expired salsa. Keep reading »

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