I will start off with the players: Me, Leo 8/11/72, born approx 8:30pm, Eugene Oregon; my husband, a Virgo, 9/5/76, born in Kitchener Ontario, and the lover, a Gemini, 5/23/77, born in Poughkeepsie NY.
My husband and I married very quickly after being friends for a long time — there had always been some chemistry and attraction, but once we were married things really went downhill. It has reached the point that I don’t want to make the effort because I resent him so much, and also the lack of response and attention from him has affected my self-esteem. We ‘took a break’ in August, this was a huge relief for me. For a variety of reasons it is not possible for us to separate completely yet, and we continue to live together. He wants to reconcile, I do not think I will ever be able to be happy in this relationship. To his credit, he is very committed to me and willing to work on the relationship, but I just don’t feel like he’s ever going to get it — get me, and that is a very lonely feeling within a relationship.
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Women have subtle and not-so-subtle ways of letting the rest of the world know their man is taken. These eight ways women mark their territory will save you from wondering how involved a guy is, and if you’re in a relationship already, then you’ve got some work to do. Keep reading »
Today The Frisky staff got to talking about male and female bosses and what happens when women hold management positions compared to when men do. The discussion started because career writer Penelope Trunk asked the question, “When women get power at work, do they use it like men do?” but she didn’t answer it.
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A woman wrote in to the Guardian this week seeking advice in dealing with her jackass of a husband who makes her feel “deeply inadequate as a wife” because her parents aren’t rich like his. She writes that she and her husband are both in their late 20s and come from Indian backgrounds. “It is a very Indian tradition for a woman’s parents to provide anything their sons-in-law ask for and treat them as princes. It is an old custom dating back to the days when women were not independent,” she writes, but explains: “My parents are from much humbler origins with very limited means compared to my in-laws.”
Her husband wants to begin his own business and her parents aren’t in a position to provide the capital he needs, “although they would probably mortgage their home to help him if they were asked to.” She says her husband has berated her on several occasions for her parents’ “lack of wealth, education and polish,” and though they love each other a lot, but his obscene jerkiness is putting a strain on their two-year marriage.
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Like everyone else, I’ve been glued to the Chris Brown/Rihanna debacle, and was saddened when I read reports that she might get back together with someone who left her so bruised and battered.
But here’s the thing: loads of couples break up and then make up and sometimes things work out great. But knowing when, and under what circumstances, to forgive and forget is key, and most of us won’t know until we’re thrust into that situation. Here are six scenarios to consider.
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“I demand an apology!”
If you have to demand it, is it really worth receiving? Forced apologies are kind of like nice plastic. Shiny, maybe even useful, but ultimately just trash.
For a long time, I wanted an official kind of apology from my husband for some jerk-like tendencies he was trying out on me. It was pretty typical Mars/Venus stuff. I wanted a demonstration of groveling to make things all right and copacetic. Which, of course, made me the total jerk. Keep reading »
The absence of a wedding ring isn’t a tell-tale sign that cutie you’re crushing on is single. So here’s eight definite ways to tell if he’s single, you know, because we don’t want you to be embarrassed or heartbroken. And if you have any signs to add, let us know in the comments. Keep reading »
The most recent edition of the K Chronicles, a comic strip on Salon, caught my eye this morning because it’s all about celebrating “life’s little victories,” like “reading a neat recipe you’d like to try…and you already have all the ingredients!” and “the one dollar bookstore actually has some good stuff.” As the strip says, we need to celebrate these everyday victories “now, more than ever,” so without further ado, after the jump are 10 Frisky-flavored victories to get excited about. Add your own in comments! Keep reading »
It’s been a little over a month since I got engaged, and other than securing a date and spot for the wedding ceremony (late July in a small Central Park garden), I haven’t done a thing to prepare. To tell you the truth, some days I don’t bother putting on my ring, and sometimes I forget I’m even engaged until someone sends me a link to a wedding dress or an invitation design I might like. It’s not that I’m not thrilled to have found someone I want to spend the rest of my life with, because I am, it’s just that I find this whole wedding planning process incredibly tedious. Obviously, a Knot Bride, I am not, but the thing is, I’m really not an Indie Bride or Offbeat Bride, either. Is there a site for the Indifferent Bride? Keep reading »
Remember when we asked if lust was more important that emotional stability? Well, according to a new study, Spaniards say yes — and Hollywood is to blame. Researchers used a version of the Love Attitude Scale, a quiz that asks people to describe how much they agree with various descriptions of love. Love Buzz found several versions of the quiz online. They include statements like “If you are going to love a person, you will ‘know’ after a short time” and “I could get over an affair with my partner pretty easily and quickly.” The quiz shows how much you accept six types of love: Eros, Pragma, Banquet, Mania, Ludus and Storge. Yes, they sound like exotic birds or rivers in Greece, but they actually refer to various ways people think about the big l-o-v-e. Your values depend on your personality, and, to a large extent, on the culture you were brought up in. Keep reading »