Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

Girl Talk: Is “I Love You” Really That Important?

“I love you,” I told Jeremy, gazing deeply into his eyes. I was 13 and he had just given me a mix tape containing “Jeremy” by Pearl Jam and “November Rain” by GNR. To me, this meant we were in love.

“I love you too,” he said.

I expected a band of unicorns to prance through the streets, for archangels to play trumpets, for a spontaneous firework show. It wasn’t really like that. Keep reading »

The Love Guru: The Importance Of Being Grateful

Towards the end of our second date, per Dr. Diana’s instructions, I told Old Flame I was dating other people as we were leaving the bar. I wasn’t sure how he’d react, but oddly, it seemed to sexually excite him. Our goodnight hug and smooch turned hot. We stood in my stairwell, kissing furiously. There was hair pulling, hand roving, and dirty talk. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy Updates: “Bated Breath” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Bated Breath” who wondered if she should wait for her long distance boyfriend of four months to say “I love you” or say it to him first. After the jump, find out what she decided to do and if she’s happy with the decision she made. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: The Quickie Breakup Vs. The Slow Band-Aid Peel Off

In the few months following my breakup from Mr. Ex-Jessica, if and how to couple up again has hovered in the periphery of my mind. It’s clear to me that I’m still very sore about the breakup and earning my trust will be a slow, perhaps even Sisyphysian Sisyphean, task for a man. But still I want occasional companionship: although there’s plenty of things to enjoy about being newly single, like lots of time to read books and hang out with my girl friends, it’s also nice to have drinks and flirt with a dude sometimes. I am OK at this point with that companionship being totally casual. In fact, I think it has to be casual. I’m not ready to be in a committed relationship or to be anyone’s girlfriend so soon.

I thought I’d found someone online to casually date: he’s smart, he’s funny, he took care of me, and he understood how sore I still am from the breakup. He’s an all-around wonderful guy who would make a great boyfriend to someone. It warmed the cockles of my black, bitter heart to know that there are good single men out there. But after about six weeks or so of going on dates once or twice a week, it became clear to me that our personalities are just too different. We clashed so many times that the romantic butterflies flew away, so to speak. I wrestled with the idea of continuing to date him because, after all, it was just casual. But putting myself in his shoes, I asked if I’d want someone to keep going on dates with me even if they weren’t feeling anything anymore. I decided “no” and that I would end things with him.

But the way I finally broke up with him was just … not … good. Keep reading »

For The Week Of May 9-15, 2011

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Admit it, you need a bigger sense of spiritual understanding to motivate you these days, as just being caught up in routine is making you feel like a robot. So, what to do? Take the bull by the horns and sort out a wild adventure, whatever that means to you, as this is the time when catharsis will be waiting at the end of that journey.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Go ahead and lose control, as balance is so passé. Yes, dive in head first into obsession, as it’ll fuel your fire in a way that nothing has in ages, making you feel like one indomitable vixen. Live out sensually and embrace this madness, as it’ll be just what it takes to prove to you that civility has no place in the presence of passion.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Weird impulsive behavior will be coming, perhaps triggered by you. Whichever the case, expect a crazy series of events that will take you around a spectrum of emotions. While there won’t be much rhyme or reason for what is to come, you can’t stop to question it, as it’s about looking ahead and seeing how to steer yourself to sunnier shores, as the past will start to blur.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Hold off on the Little Miss Know-It-All routine, as you’ll have to take a much more slack approach to dealing with those around you now. Yes, your words won’t be so helpful, as they will seem more nagging, leaving you walking that fine line between helpful and harassing. Not to say it’s all you, but a matter of an inevitable skewed perception of you. c

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Be aware of your “all about me” mindset taking over; it might get your laid and all, but it won’t get you the compassion you need to satisfy your ego. Not to say you can’t say what you want, but do take that half-second more to think about how your actions will play out, as it may be more brutal on another than you first assume.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

You can’t be everything to everyone and when this week hits, all you will want to do is sink into homebody mode and just watch the world drift by from the inside. No matter, there are lots of delightful treats you can dial up and enjoy behind closed doors, as not everything you enjoy now will have to require so much effort.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

When it comes to enticing your libido, realize it’s all about the tease and playing a flirtatious game of cat and mouse now. After all, time is on your side, so it’s the perfect time to work out the kinks of a love affair that has become staid and give it that last college try. As you may discover, the crash course approach can score you an A+ in the romance department.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

When life isn’t going as you wish, there is one guaranteed way to cure your blues — throw some money at it. Yes, when it comes to any issues you are facing now, don’t hesitate to think of buying your way out of it, because as it goes, taking the most direct route will work best for you now.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

You have every right to believe what you want to believe, but even so, not everyone you’re dealing with will own up to what is right immediately. So, this isn’t the time to get too pushy or overconfident when dealing with more passive or proud types. For now, just trust those instincts of yours and know that an upcoming victory is in the bag!

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Although you do love to share, this isn’t the time to show off what happens behind closed doors. As it goes, a secret and saucy affair can start to stir, which will be way hotter in clandestine mode. Besides, who knows how you may really feel and if anything, your aloofness will give you the space to sort it all out when the time is ready.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Hot athletic sex is in your stars! Yes, get ready to work that body of yours a little harder, as you will likely have to stretch your stamina to new levels of endurance. An all consuming, yet quirky affair may get triggered, leaving you to break records and dazzle with new and naughty feats. Funny how others think you’re just so innocent? Hahahaha….

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

This is your time to have the world at your feet, doing your bidding All you need is some persistence and vision, as the gods of charm will be bestowing you with everything else you need to get yourself to the top. However, scandal and gossip are sure to follow, but as you’ll find, being envied is all part of the glamour of success.

Define Your Own Boundaries (Or Why You Shouldn’t Feel Guilty About Casual Sex)

So there’s been a lot of talk lately about slut shaming, casual sex, and what exactly defines a girl as “whorey.” Instead of clearing all of that up for you with this post, I’m probably just going to create another grey area, but hey, that’s what life is all about, isn’t it?

Right. Okay.

So I want to talk to you ladies about one night stands. Casual sex. Hookups. Booty calls. Those guys you sleep with once and probably never see again. The reason I want to talk to you girls about this is because a lot of you are probably cringing right now, recalling your last one night stand, the last time you slept with a guy and then walked home in last night’s clothes, the last time you had casual sex and then felt guilty about it. In fact you’re probably feeling guilty all over again right now. And I want to tell you to stop. Stop cringing. Stop feeling guilty. Stop second guessing and over thinking and feeling bad about yourself. Because you know what? Casual sex is okay. And you know what makes it okay? The fact that you wanted to have casual sex. Read more… Keep reading »

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