Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

I Am Giving Up Being An Insecure Head Case For Lent

Happy Ash Wednesday! I’m not religious; is that the proper sentiment? Anyway, today begins the 40 days and 40 nights of Lent, a period where Christians — particularly Catholics, Lutherans, Methodists, and Presbyterians — sacrifice for Jesus, often by giving up some sort of vice. Like I said, I am not religious and won’t be getting smudged at my local church today, but I will be giving something up for Lent because, well, why not? Keep reading »

12 Dating Phrases We’re Just Not That Into Anymore

Sometimes the worst part of dating is having to endure the cliche phrases that accompany it. I swear, if one more person says, “He’s just not that into you,” I’m going to jump into my oven and never come out. It was fun back in 2003 when the phrase debuted on “Sex and the City” and then became the title of a book (and then a movie!), but let’s be honest, it’s totally played out. I get it. I grasp the concept. He’s just not that into me and if he was, he would be. Next PLEASE? I beg of you single population-at-large, let’s make dating somewhat hip again so we can feel non-lame while engaging in it. After the jump, some dating phrases that we need to put the kibosh on. Add your suggestions for replacement phrases in the comments. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “I’m Tired Of Always Feeling Used By Guys”

I am a 21-year-old female college senior who has been physically involved with a guy for about three months. In the beginning, he told me how he thought I was “girlfriend material” and made it seem like he wanted to pursue a relationship, but after a few weeks, it became clear to me that all he wanted from me was sex. I allowed this arrangement to continue, because with my busy class and work schedule, I don’t really have much time for a relationship either. All of a sudden, over the past couple of days, he has completely ignored me, started posting things on Facebook about having had an “epiphany” and realizing what the “true meaning of love is.” I texted him saying that it was OK if he had met someone new or if he just did not want to sleep with me anymore, but that I would have liked to have been made aware of this (reasonable, no?). But alas, he has not responded. I truly am happy for him if he has found someone new, because there really is no future for us, but I feel disrespected. I am also in the place I always find myself after something like this happens: depressed, lonely, and my self-esteem is crushed. Do you have any advice for me as to how I can deal with this kind of situation in the future so that I don’t feel so used? — Used up

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Girl Talk: I Broke Up With My Parents

My parents are still married. They just celebrated their 28th wedding anniversary. But when I saw them again it was separately, first one then the other. It had to be this way. Seeing both of them for the first time in over two years would have just been too much.

See, I broke up with my parents two-and-a-half years before this visit. I called them on Halloween, after avoiding voicemails for weeks. My teeth were chattering. “I need a break from this relationship,” I said and my mom burst into tears. My dad, quiet, mirrored back what I said … then tried to turn the conversation to normal things. Keep reading »

Solitude Is A Virtue

When I was 13, I started locking myself in my lair and writing angsty poetry, which caused people (especially my parents) to assume that I was a lonely, depressed, misanthropic hermit. As it turns out, I was spending some very necessary and healthy time alone. A new study at Harvard University found that spending time alone is crucial for us to have fully-developed personalities. Sufficient quality time with numero uno has been linked to improved focus, memory, creativity, mood, and even better social skills when we finally emerge from our caves. Keep reading »

Dater X: 10 Things I Did Right As A Single Woman

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Last night, while watching “The Bachelor: The Women Tell All,” I found myself getting more than a little choked up watching Ashley Spivey’s one-on-one interview with Chris Harrison. Her hands folded delicately in her lap, she talked about how Brad Womack‘s rejection feels like a pattern she’s been stuck in for years. On that first night, Brad had given her the first impression rose. For maybe two weeks, he adored her. And then, he sent her home. “I’m in disbelief right now,” Ashley said in the backseat of the limo. “They always say the exact same thing, ‘You’re going to make such a great wife, just not for me.’” Elvis crooned “Are You Lonesome Tonight” in the background.

I looked across my living room at a bouquet of flowers that The Young One bought me for no particular reason, and noted that my dog was curled up on a t-shirt he left here over the weekend. The Young One and I are approaching the two-month mark and things remain so awesome between us. But man, oh man, do I remember feeling the way Ashley does. Keep reading »

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