I read Eliza Jules’ essay “I Obsessively Monitor My Husband’s Lube Bottle” over at xoJane and was left with this question: Is a partner’s masturbation something we should worry about? The more I’ve thought about it, though, the more I’ve concluded that, for me, I’m at the very opposite end of the spectrum as Jules; I’d be worried if someone I was dating didn’t masturbate, all the more so if I was the cause behind them holding off in the self-love department. I also wouldn’t expect someone’s firmly entrenched patterns of masturbation and porn use, especially if I met them well into their adult life, to change just because they were with me.
I’ll even go so far as to say I would definitely not want to be the sole source of my partner’s masturbation fodder. Part of it? Sure. But imagine the pressure if every single time they jerked off, they were thinking about you. That would creep me out a bit, and while I’m not an expert, I don’t think that’s a realistic goal, especially when you’re talking about long-term relationships. Keep reading »
One of the most frequently asked questions in the world of dating has got to be “If they’re not your significant other, than what the hell are they?” Well, pre-exclusive relationships (or PXRs) don’t have to be a frustrating grey area anymore. Here’s a handy guide to the 9 most common types of PXRs, all converted into abbreviations for easy texting. Keep reading »
Ever since “The Talk” happened, things have been better with Spontaneous Guy than I could have imagined. We’ve been spending more time together, getting to know each other on a deeper level, and continuing to have fun.
“Everything is going great, but I’m still panicking,” I told Dr. Diana during our last meeting.
We spent most of the session trying to unravel what exactly I was panicking about when it came to my relationship with Spontaneous Guy. By the end of the hour we had excavated my biggest anxiety about what could go wrong in a relationship, the fear that has led me to the killer belief that love means someone has to get hurt.
“I am terrified that I will fall in love and he will jump ship suddenly without explanation,” I said, tears forming in my eyes.
“Tell me why,” Dr. Diana asked. Keep reading »
Something no one tells you about sex? A good romp in the sack can be dangerous. No, I’m not talking about potentially deadly sexually transmitted diseases and infections, like HIV. (Although those are dangerous too, obviously.) I’m talking about the rug burn, pulled hair, and the overzealous nipple bite (ow!) that every woman needs to watch out for. And no, a hickey doesn’t count as an “injury.” Keep reading »
An unfaithful father makes for an unfaithful husband. You may now add this to your handy list of relationship adages to live by right next to, “If he treats his mother like crap, he will probably treat you the same way.” According to a new study done at Charles University in Prague, men were found to be far more likely to cheat if they grew up with a father who was unfaithful. The daughters of cheaters, however did not suffer a similar fate. The researchers’ conclusion was as follows: Good-looking parents produce good-looking children. Said attractive children have more opportunities to stray if they are men but more opportunities to snag a genetically desirable mate if they are women. But the attractiveness theory doesn’t quite cover the rest of the population. I mean, ugly people cheat too. How do they explain that? Well, it’s all about the motivation for the infidelity. The study found that of the cheating men surveyed, most were motivated to stray by sex and sex alone, while the cheating women only wanted to explore their sexual options if they were unhappy in their relationships. And that will be all for your “Differences Between Men and Women 101″ lecture today. See you next week for more interesting discoveries about how men are really into sex and women are really into feelings. [Daily Mail UK] Keep reading »