A few weeks ago, on a first date, a guy told me about how watching his mother — a strong, intelligent woman who held the family together — made him into a feminist. Then he asked me what it was that made me start caring about women’s equality. I’m sure he expected that I was going to tell him a traditional “how I became a feminist” story: Dad hauled me to my first pro-choice march kicking and screaming, or my parents were radical separatist lesbians, or Mom was a famous liberal journalist and progressive ideals were in their blood.
Not. At. All.
My blood is the thick, viscous fluid of dirty martinis. My parents contributed to me becoming a feminist, sure. But it was only because as I was a young sprout blossoming into a beautiful flower, they were … kind of sexist. Keep reading »
The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry. I am the mouse in this metaphor, Spontaneous Guy is the man, and the plan is to have “The Talk.”
Per Dr. Diana’s instructions, I carefully crafted a strategy to initiate the exclusivity talk with Spontaneous Guy. We had plans on Friday night to go to a friend’s rooftop party together, spend the night at my place, and take a long walk along the Brooklyn Waterfront on Saturday. Keep reading »
It starts early. Little girls give each other broken heart necklaces for their birthdays while boys have paintball parties. While boys are encouraged to participate in sports and group activities, us girls are pushed to more one-on-one activities like tea parties or making Barbies have sex under a blanket. Studies show that there are different friendship styles for boys and girls. In one, when middle school girls were faced with the prospect of meeting a new friend, their brains lit up in areas associated with pleasure and reward. Boy brains’ just didn’t do the same thing.
My “anecdotal evidence” from the field? Over the years, I could actually feel my brain light up when it became clear that a new friend would earn the title of “best.” I’ve learned that these relationships are just as valuable as any amorous one and that they do indeed have their own sense of romance.
For me, they also bring about a whole lot of crazy. Keep reading »
This Sunday, fathers and daughters everywhere will be spending quality time together talking about important life issues, reminiscing about stories from childhood, and waxing poetic about the future. While we highly encourage dad/daughter bonding, we’ve compiled this handy list of awkward conversations you may want to avoid if you plan on having a pleasant holiday with dad. After the jump, some unapproved conversation topics this Father’s Day. Keep reading »
As the saying goes, when it rains, it pours. The last few weeks have been pretty hard for me. An immediate family member is in the hospital; while they aren’t in mortal danger, the situation is messy and as their power of attorney, I’m having to juggle my emotional stress with a legal responsibility that feels uncomfortable but is nonetheless necessary. Additionally, there have been other, uh, unpleasant developments in my personal life that have left my heart feeling incredibly bruised and disappointed. Yet the last few weeks have been made much more manageable thanks to my amazing family, friends, and coworkers, who have shown their support in just the right ways. After the jump, a 4-step plan for supporting a friend or family member who’s going through a crappy time. If you have any additional steps you want to add, share them in the comments! Keep reading »