When did I become the star of the Lifetime movie, “In Love With A Stranger”? (This movie does not exist yet, but it should.) Was this the way “General Hospital”‘s Elizabeth Webber felt when she found out her husband, Ric Lansing, had kidnapped Carly Corinthos and was keeping her locked up in a secret room in their house? Was this kind of betrayal what Janet Jackson was singing about on the song “What About?” How many songs, movies, and books have been penned about deception? Countless, I think. But there are two people I’ve been thinking about in particular, who seem like they would get what it feels like to find out you’d been lied to for years by the person you loved. They are Julie Metz, author of Perfection: A Memoir of Betrayal and Renewal, and my ex-fiance’s college girlfriend, who emailed me yesterday out of the blue. Keep reading »
For the first two years of my relationship with my Large Greek Boyfriend, his mom didn’t acknowledge me by name. I was simply, “The Girl.”
“Are you bringing The Girl?” she’d inquire when he made plans for family dinner. “Does The Girl like spanikopita?” Being a typical dude, it didn’t register on the BF’s radar, but her refusal to eke out more than those two syllables made me paranoid. Did she not like me because I’m not Greek? Had I said something stupid during our initial meet and greet? He assured me she liked me just fine, she just didn’t want to bother learning a name if I wasn’t going to stick around.
Whatever the case, his mom’s inability to say my name paled in comparison to 28-year-old lawyer Anna’s mother-in-law. “I met her at our wedding and the first thing she said to me—her new daughter-in-law—was, ‘So, are you pregnant?’”
Annoyed, Anna told her she’d have to wait and see. Things got worse after Anna gave birth to their son (two years later, thank you very much!). “The doctor came in to ask how I was doing and before I could answer—and in front of everyone—my mother-in-law asked the doctor, ‘How much for a paternity test?’” Sweet! Keep reading »
Passive aggressive behavior is probably on most people’s list of annoying qualities in another person. Scratch that, passive aggressive behavior usually falls into the category of legit reasons to banish someone for your life. I have never been pro passive aggression, in fact, I get rather peeved when someone pulls the hot/cold routine on me. I think my thoughts on passive aggression and its unfailing ability to make any situation worse is probably shared by most of you. Over the past week or so I have posted on the complexities of friendship, especially girlfriendship, and many of you commented that the tendency for girls to engage in passive aggression was one of the number one reasons you did not pursue female friendships. I was totally on board with this popular sentiment until I realized that not only have I been acting all passive aggressive myself this week, but I was glad I had. Keep reading »
A few weeks ago I wrote about how I wasn’t sure if I was really ready to be dating again, that I was still dealing with the lingering effects of my last relationship in which my fiance ended things suddenly.
“…I desperately fear, in all sincerity, that I will never again find someone who loved me like my ex-fiance did. And that even if I do, they will likely leave me the way he did. Isn’t that pathetic?”
A friend of mine emailed me, specifically about that line, saying it wasn’t what she expected to hear me say. Keep reading »
Dudes, don’t take any cues from Drew Olanoff. The Twitter user, who apparently is known for starting the Twitter campaign “#blamedrewscancer” after he was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, proposed to his girlfriend via Twitter. Sarah Cooley said yes, but we wouldn’t blame her for being pissed that he asked for her hand in marriage in such a public way — and not even in person! [Mashable] Keep reading »
Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send your pic to firstname.lastname@example.org. Keep reading »
Let’s get science-y. I read this study today about how women can be attracted to a number of different things, physically. (I am assuming this study was done in the US or some western European country). Men, on the other hand, are attracted to mainly the same things and no, the answer is not “vagina” as my boyfriend so helpfully put it when I asked him if he knew what physical characteristics all men liked.
The overall message was that men like women who are thin and seductive. On a related note, there should literally be a book of obvious studies done. Do you know how many come out each year? You’ll see headlines like “Swallowing more than one magnet extremely dangerous” and “It’s confusing to drive in Germany.” Yes, we know this. My problem with this current study is threefold. I am pretty sure that’s a word. Continue reading…
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The second SexReally podcast by anti-hookup crusader Laura Sessions Stepp is online, this time looking into the subject of “Why Nice Guys Finish Last.”
Jorge from NYC told Sessions Stepp that he “stopped being nice” because he wasn’t getting any girls and added, “I know guys who are a**holes because they think that’s the only approach to get women.” Brittany, a student at George Washington University, gushed over bad boy “confidence” and “swagger” and dished about a relationship she had with a guy who “made [her] feel lower in some way” and wasn’t “gainfully employed legally.” I guess we women just don’t know what’s good for us!
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It’s a rough and tumble world out there, especially when it comes to dating and relationships. Many of us as children were taught to follow the Ten Commandments, or some version of it, in order to ensure that we become good people or “Leave It To Beaver” neighbors. I can’t remember them all off the top of my head, and it would take a real minor miracle for me to recite them all in order, but in general you can’t go terribly wrong following them…except when it comes to dating. Maybe the commandments were never intended to cover the tricky navigation of romance, but when you apply the Ten Commandments to dating…oh what a mess you find yourself in! Keep reading »
Yesterday I wrote Advice For The Vertically Challenged and was surprised by some of the comments. Many quite fairly pointed out that perhaps my definition of “short” should be revised, or that I should be clear that just because I feel short at 5′ 5″ does not make this height or anything bellow it qualify as “short.” What really struck a chord with me, however, were comments concerning height differences when it comes to dating. I started thinking about my own reasons for feeling short and realized that it was mostly due to the fact that most of the men I have dated have been at least six feet tall. Hmmm, I wonder… Keep reading »