Child: Hey mom, I got you something really special for Mother’s Day! Here are some Mr. Clean products for you so you can get back to the job that really matters to you — cleaning the house.
Mom: Oh thank you, honey! I can’t imagine anything that I would enjoy more. I didn’t want to hurt your feelings, but that day at the spa you were talking about treating me to sounded awful. [Buzzfeed] Keep reading »
I don’t care if it feels like kissing. I have no desire to put a motorized straw in my mouth and pretend like it’s a human mouth. This kiss transmission device, which uses computers to simulate the way a person kisses down to their taste, breathing, and moistness of the tongue, is very ingenious, but very unnecessary in my opinion. Kissing is one of the few simple pleasures in life. It is perfect just as it is. I say, if it ain’t broke, don’t digitize it. How about you? Would you kiss this thing? [Buzzfeed] Keep reading »
I walked into the restaurant and spotted Old Flame sitting at the bar sipping a beer. He looked better than I remembered and when I hugged him I felt a stirring in my nether regions.
Near the end of a dinner filled with laughter, Old Flame’s hazel eyes turned serious. He reached across the table and gave me an unexpected kiss on the lips. It was soft and sweet. No tongue. Keep reading »
I lost my virginity at age 15, in a double wide trailer. I remember his abs glowing under the black-light and the mood music–a Ginuwine album on repeat. I had snuck out on a snowy school night, holding my shoes in my hand. I felt sort of frozen and surreal, somehow knowing this was the night, and barely noticing the fact that I was just wearing wet socks in his car.
There isn’t much to describing first time sex. I felt more like I was watching myself from above than experiencing it, thinking Oh my god, this is sex! or Just move your hips with Ginuwine. Afterward, naked and side by side, I stared into his eyes, my heart feeling huge. My virginity had become a burden that past year and this was, surely, a turning point in my life. He suddenly locked eyes with mine and opened his mouth. I wanted to remember every second of this moment.
Does Wendy Williams, host of GSN’s new show, “Love Triangle,” believe in love at first sight? Not quite, but she does believe in love after first conversation. Dude, story of my life. I have seriously said, more times than I can count, “Oh my god, I think I love him!” after having one lengthy and deep conversation with a dude. Most recently, my boyfriend, and thankfully that hasn’t fizzled — but so many others did the minute I realized that one lengthy, deep conversation was all that homeboy had to offer. Sigh. Anyway, don’t forget to watch “Love Triangle” weeknights at 7:00 p.m. EST /6:00 p.m. CST on the Game Show Network. [“Love It Or Leave It"] Keep reading »
I know it’s poor form to crucify one person for more than one stupid statement per interview, but here goes. Now, that we’ve expressed our anger over the Will.i.am condom comment in Elle, I would like to address his musings on baby wipes.
[My pet peeve is if a woman's] got only dry toilet paper and no baby wipes next to the toilet … Here’s proof on why people should have baby wipes. Get some chocolate, wipe it on a wooden floor, and then try to get it up with some dry towels. You’re going to get chocolate in the cracks. That’s why you gotta get them baby wipes.