Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

22 Things I Wish I Knew About Dating When I Was 22

For the last few years, I’ve been a mentor to a former student of mine from my days as a junior high school teacher. Now that she is out of college, we have become friends, or more like older sister/ younger sister, or somewhere between parent and peer. I met her when she was 15. Now she’s 22. The other evening she was telling me about this guy she’s been dating on and off. In short, I do not approve of him. Listening to her talk, I remembered how when I was her age, I was in a very similar dating situation. I wanted to shake her and say, “Dump his ass now!” But that wouldn’t be right. If someone had said that to me, I would have laughed at them and then told them to f**k off. I wanted to spare her all of the pain, all of the mistakes I made myself. But I suppose I can’t. Sigh. Such is life. People learn in their own time. Instead, I offer my unsolicited advice about what I wish I knew about dating when I was 22 and hope that she reads it and figures it out for herself. Add your dating wisdom nuggets in the comments. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: Just Call Me Miss Lonely Hearts

Wow, what a crazy past few months. I believe I cared for myself pretty well after my big breakup, which was now almost four months ago. I surrounded myself with my family, which was easy because I moved back in with my parents. I spent a lot of QT with my girl friends. I drank and shopped and watched crappy TV shows, as you do. When I felt ready to poke my head out of my hole and venture out on dates again, I splurged on a couple pairs of sexy heels. I kept myself busy buying furniture for my new apartment, being a good sister and friend, doing my taxes — anything I could think of.

Now I’m all moved into my new place. I go on dates with a new guy, casually, once or twice a week. After months of tiny tornadeos wrecking havoc on the blessed life I had six months ago, outward appearances look like the dust has finally settled.

Inside? That’s a different story. Keep reading »

Poll: Should You Tell Your Ex(es) That You’re Getting Married?

Should You Tell Your Ex(es) That You're Getting Married?

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Rough Or Gentle: How Does Your Date Like It?

This helpful guide, created with data from OK Cupid user profiles, breaks down male/ female sex styles by keywords. This should come in very handy when searching for an online date who is CYNICAL like me. Check out some more informative OK Cupid sex charts here. [OK Cupid] Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend’s Friends Act Like I Don’t Exist”

My boyfriend is awesome, supportive, and ultimately even more of a feminist than I am. The problem is that I can’t help but feel like I get treated differently (by others) for being the woman in the relationship. Most of the men we mutually know treat me as if I don’t exist when they’re around my boyfriend and me. For example, my boyfriend and I used to throw house shows for local bands, many of whom we are friends with. Frequently, I would plan these shows on my own, and personally direct correspondence with the bands. As soon as they arrived to our house, though, they would direct all of their questions to my boyfriend instead of me, even though they knew I was the one who planned it. Another instance is one of our male roommates, who will speak to me one-on-one, but as soon as the three of us are together, he will not address me, and I’m given a strange look and am immediately brushed off if I try to contribute anything. I don’t feel as if I’ve done anything to make these men see me as incompetent, and my boyfriend and I certainly don’t advertise him as “the boss” or something. It’s starting to kill my self-esteem and causing me to resent my relationship. Could I possibly be doing something wrong that causes men to treat me this way, or is this really just a hazard of being “the girlfriend”? Is there anything I can do to change things? — Hear Me Roar

Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I Was Pregnant, He Was Partying

One night, while six months pregnant, I woke to the sound of something crashing down the stairs. That something, I discovered, was my husband Jason, who lay sprawled on the floor like a limp marionette. At first, I was worried. Had he broken his neck? Was the father of my unborn child alive? But my next thought might strike some people as mean, although I can explain. It was: Good—serves him right. Keep reading »

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