About seven years ago, when I had just gotten out of two back-to-back, serious relationships, my good friend Sadie* was eager to get me to dip my toe back in the dating pool again. I was 26 years old and single for the first time in many, many years. So, basically, I had no idea what the hell I was doing. I had never really “dated” before.
I’d met my last two boyfriends randomly through friends. I wasn’t looking to meet them, I just did. We got to know each other slowly, there wasn’t any pressure, and I knew they both really cared about me. I thought this was just the way people met; that falling in love was something that happened easily. Looking back, I realize how terribly naive I was.
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I’ve been a vegetarian for 20 years, and have been dating about as long. Being a vegetarian isn’t weird, and dating shouldn’t be, but sometimes dating-while-vegetarian can throw a bit of a wrench in the game.
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If a guy doesn’t check you out on Facebook before your first date, he definitely will afterwards. While your profile and posting habits aren’t a be-all end-all, they can push a man who’s teetering toward calling it quits. After polling several men, we found six common Facebook faux pas that will cause a dude to re-evaluate the relationship and redirect his affection elsewhere.
1. You bash your ex. Relegate all man-hating to girls-only nights. Comments about ex-boyfriends and bad dates make you look petty, immature and hung up the past. Plus, guys simply hate whiners. Keep reading »
For as long as I can remember, I’ve loved to cook. And while I love cooking for myself, I especially love cooking for others. It’s one of the ways I feel most comfortable showing affection. Cooking brings out a nurturing side that, quite frankly, is just waiting to kick into high gear once I have a kid. Cooking makes me feel womanly and, by extension, cooking for a man makes me feel sexy. But cooking for men I’ve dated over the last few years, since I became single following the breakup of my engagement, hasn’t been as positive an experience as I would have hoped. In fact, it’s something that I now vow I won’t do until I feel a certain security with the man sitting across from me at the dinner table. Keep reading »
I’d never slept with a virgin. On our second date, Jim and I escaped from a hot and overcrowded bar and sat on a bench outside. Fueled by a few pints of Guinness and the urge to confess, Jim admitted to being a 30-year-old virgin. He’d never even had a girlfriend. After a long moment of silence, I asked him, trying to sound as non-intimidating as possible, why that was.
Jim didn’t have a concrete reason. He rattled off details about his life. He was Catholic, but didn’t go to church and definitely wasn’t saving himself. He went to an all-boys high school. He lived at home during college and grad school, though he owned an apartment now. He really didn’t know why. The desire was there; the opportunity just hadn’t presented itself. Keep reading »