Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

Single Ladies Rejoice! Living With Someone Causes Weight Gain

Dang it, we knew there had to be a trade-off for getting sex on demand when you live with a partner: A recent Australian study of 6,000 women has shown that, after 10 years, the average gal gains 15 lbs. if she lives with a partner and 20 lbs. if she lives with someone and has a baby. According to The New York Times, “There is no reason to believe that having a partner causes metabolic changes, so the weight gain among childless women with partners was almost surely caused by altered behavior.” You know, like those post-coital pints of Cherry Garcia.

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12 Times You Can’t Break Up With Someone

I’ve gone through breakups on the day before Valentine’s, on Yom Kippur, and once even naked. Actually, that was probs the best one, strangely enough; it felt so honest and, hey, at least I spared myself bad sex. Anyway, as someone who dates a lot — pretty unsuccessfully — I know about breakups. They’re a fact of life love. So, if you’re planning on dumping your boo, here are some times you’re gonna have to carry that weight just a little bit longer. Otherwise, you might wind up in a situation similar to this tragic Dater X Christmas story. As they say, timing is everything! Keep reading »

Love Vandal: A Very Supportive Wall

Reader Sarah snapped this in NYC’s Lower East Side.

Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send your pic to Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “Should I Tell My BFF Her Ex Committed Suicide?”

I recently found out, through tracking rumors and calling people I haven’t talked to in years, that the high school sweetheart of one of my best friends committed suicide about three months ago. They broke up three years ago after a very tumultuous relationship, finally resulting in him hitting her in the face once, and her heading for the door for good. He had substance abuse problems, and a very difficult family situation, and would frequently contact my friend for the first two years following their breakup. He would be depressed, drunk, and trying to get her back. Every time. She cut off all contact with him, and I know that she doesn’t know about his death yet. The real issue here is whether or not I should tell her. On one hand, I don’t want to hide anything from her, but on the other hand, I’m worried about how she’ll react. She has dealt with severe depression herself, and has suffered some extreme hardships. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but worst of all, I think she will blame herself. Unfortunately she has never been one to handle these extreme emotions very well (not that I view that as a weakness, she’s just been through a lot), and depending on the timing, I’m almost afraid she’ll hurt herself. Even though he turned out to be bad news on the relationship front, remembering him from high school is a whole different story. He was, at least at some point, a wonderful person who was dealt many unfortunate hands in life, and part of me almost feels as though it would be a discredit to his memories if the love of his life remained unaware of his death. I’m so confused, and I’m not thinking clearly. Any thoughts? — Caring Friend

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Dater X: I Got Dumped For Christmas

Fine, I’ll admit it. I had many a daydream about how I was going to spend the week between Christmas and New Year’s. I was looking forward to a staycation and getting to spend lots of time with the Architect. We’d been dating for a month and a half and I imagined us heading out in the snow to museums, cuddling up on the couch to watch TV shows, going to parties as a couple, and having sleepovers where, for once, we could actually sleep in. So my stomach got that just-belly-flopped-off-the-high-dive feeling when he called on Christmas Eve and said, “Can we talk?”

Noooooooooo! Keep reading »

GuySpeak/GirlSpeak: Money Changes Everything

Happy New Year, everyone! Let’s start 2010 off right with a steaming hot GuySpeak/GirlSpeak, where we take the advice given by guys to girls over at GuySpeak, chop it up, then serve our words of wisdom. This week’s topic: the awkward world of couples and money.

What do you think of a guy that makes over $250k/yr, spends freely on himself but will not help a long term girlfriend out when she falls on hard times? P.S.–the girlfriend regularly prepares meals for him, does his laundry. Other than she is a doormat and he is a creep. Why do guys not help out financially?

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It’s Not You, It’s Me — We’ve Got Lame Breakup Excuses

While flipping through a copy of People recently, I saw that in the “out” section of a recent Style Watch “in” and “out” list — sandwiched between things like “stainless steel home decor” and “molten chocolate cake” — was “long distance relationships.” This struck me as something that really could never be either in or out, so I had to hear the explanation.

“It’s part of a new green, eco-conscious attitude: Break up with your out-of-state boyfriend or girlfriend because it’s not sustainable, and date local!” Jennifer Ganshirt of Frank About Women, a marketing-to-women consulting firm, told the mag.

Granted, it makes for a lot of fantastic break-up lines: “Colin, it’s not you, it’s the environment,” or, “I think we should see more sustainable people” or even, “There’s another woman: Mother Earth.”

But beyond the fact that this is taking the green thing a little too far, is there seriously anyone who would actually use an excuse like this to break it off?

Apparently, there is. After quizzing friends, it turns out that there are even more lame ways to pull the plug. Read more Keep reading »

365 Days In Paris: Goodbye For Good?

It all happened so quickly. And was over just as fast.

At 9 a.m. on Wednesday morning, I found myself unexpectedly waiting at the Gare du Nord, my heart beating out of my chest and my head spinning like crazy. It was only 12 hours ago that my ex-love, Alex, had come back into my life, and it took only a fistful of Euros and a three-hour train ride to close the distance—both metaphorical and physical—between us.

Strangely, it had been almost a year since Alex and I saw each other last. We’d struck up a blog romance last year and had such a profound connection that we had crossed the Atlantic a few times to see each other. Keep reading »

For The Week Of January 4-10, 2010

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

There’ll be a feeling of destiny taking over your life, which will mean magical coincidences will be unraveling right before your eyes and effortless changes will make your life totally creamy and dreamy. Yes, big shifts are under way, and as it goes, your life today won’t be quite the same tomorrow. So, savor these moments now, because a major adventure is about to begin.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Decision time is coming, as the honeymoon phase ends and reality sets in, making you really see what chips you have on the table and what you are willing to gamble. While you’ve made up your mind by gut before, this time around prudence is welcome. Even if you do make your conclusions abruptly, at the least you should respect your situation enough to be thorough.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

There is nothing wrong with slowing down your pace, taking in the moment and being a bit old-fashioned. The fact is, sharing ideas and building mental bonds is what turns you on the most right now, but you will only get to the meat of this intellectual bonanza if you stop thinking you have to keep running a five-ring circus.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

This week, you’ll be more fired up to flaunt yourself. You’ll really feel as if you’ve got it and others want to see it. Yes, your confidence will be riding high and it’ll make you one hot commodity, so don’t be silly and waste those talents on just anyone. Know that some discrimination now will go a long way, in your heart and, more importantly, in your body.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

It’s the New Year and your birthday month, so chances are you’re still coming down from the festive frenzy — but it’s not like you need excuses anyway. This is the time of year that if it isn’t crazy, then something is wrong. If you have to get bitchy and bossy, feel free. After all, someone needs to take a leadership role, might as well be the smartest one of the bunch — you.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

As you step further in this New Year, you are going to have to be clearer and more forceful in your actions and expressing what you think is special enough to bring along and what is just wrong to haul along any further. As the repressions of the holidays have painted a thorough picture for you, time to open those eyes wide and really see what is true love or true lies.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Work on curbing your horniness for just a few and take a time-out to reconnect with your baby in a PG kind of way. This means having fun with your clothes on and enjoying the companionship side of your bond. If possible, to keep it chill, plan more activities with friends, because as it goes, building your social world together now will be the best foreplay you can ask for.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

You won’t be able to fight your fame this week, so give it up. Go with the flow and take each day as it comes, as the demands for your time won’t give you space to plan anything for you. The good news is that all this fanfare will make you feel hot and sexy; the bad news is it won’t give you time to indulge in the groupies immediately — but that doesn’t mean you can’t take numbers.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

You’re going to have to keep a sense of humor this week, if you want to get any. Seems that someone will be acting on a much flakier level than usual and his excuses will seem too fantastical to be real, but forget taking anything too personally this week, or it’ll be just too lonely to bear. Realize this isn’t desperation either, but just the way it has to be right now.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

Don’t let your imagination get away with itself, because this isn’t the week where anything obvious is going to happen and it’ll leave much room for interpretation — but don’t lose your mind over it either, because the truth may just be that boring. If anything, this is your time to whip out the compassion, as there will be much dullness in the air.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

No matter how far your confidence nosedives at times or what kooky story you try to convince yourself of, realize your life and your relationship are A-OK. In fact, love won’t be getting better than it will this week, as you realize you’ve been going along at cruise control and feeling normal all the while. Love it, because the bottom won’t be falling out.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

You can talk and talk, but it’s like he just can’t get you. To say the least, frustration is coming and it’ll seem as if the red tape is going to dampen your love buzz, as his conservative values clash with yours. Whatever. Go ahead, throw your tantrums. At the least, that’ll be one way you can entertain yourself amid the surrounding deadbeat energy.

Love Vandal: Earth Angel

Reader Rebecca spotted this aww-inducing sidewalk while taking her dogs for a walk.

Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send your pic to Keep reading »

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