I’ve been writing relationship advice for nearly ten years now and the number-one question I get asked—by readers and friends alike—isn’t anything filthy or even fun. It is: “How come I can’t meet anyone?”
Depending on your situation, there are a variety of answers to this question, but mostly, finding someone to tongue wrestle with on a regular basis comes down to a combination of luck and timing. That said, there are things you can do to ensure that you never even come close to falling in love. Keep reading »
Annika’s post this week about the difficulty in making friends as a grown-up got such a huge response, I thought it warranted a reply here. Who knew so many of us had a friend shortage? Well, as someone who grew up on the move — I lived in 10 different homes in four different countries on three different continents before the age of 18 — my friend-making skills were constantly put to test. As a result, I learned some tips that have served me well as an adult well beyond college, when making friends was as easy as swinging a 6-pack within a 5-mile radius of campus. After reading through all 60+ comments (and counting) on yesterday’s post, I’ve compiled some of the best reader advice as well as some of my own favorite tips for making new friends, after the jump. Keep reading »
If you thought your friend was about to make a mistake—say, buy a computer that gets a ton of viruses or stay in a really dodgy hostel in Rome—you’d try to convince them to do something different, right? Well, I feel a little guilty because I have a friend who might be making a mistake by getting married this summer and I tried to talk him out of it. Keep reading »
Post-failed engagement, I’m not sure how into the idea of marriage I am. I think it’s great for other people and maybe I’ll really want to get married eventually, but for now, I don’t really see it as the end-all, be-all of my romantic future. That said, I’m all about commitment and monogamy, just without a legal document decreeing it so. But according to a conversation on “The View” this morning, this kind of commitment — the wedding band-less kind — is not as serious. The gals were talking about David Letterman of course, and Whoopi kept exclaiming that during the time that Letterman was schtooping his staff, he may have been with Regina Lasko for nearly 20 years, but he hadn’t married her yet. And based on all the clatter Whoopi has heard around the Hot Topics table over the years, that made his cheating not as bad. I think that’s ridiculous. Keep reading »
Online dating website OKCupid has posted an entry on its blog that takes a close look at its users’ email response patterns according to race. The results might not be surprising, but they’re nevertheless significant—a sender’s race plays a large role in whether he/she will get a response. By comparing the write-back rate of Asian, black, white, Hispanic, Middle Eastern, Pacific Islander, Indian, and Native American men and women, the website finds that correspondence is noticeably less or more than what the write-back rate “should” be. In a nutshell, OKCupid breaks down the research, which analyzed about a million users. White men get the most responses. Black women respond the most yet receive far fewer replies. White, Asian, and Hispanic women largely prefer white men. OKCupid calls this racism:
“[We] are about to basically prove that, despite what you might’ve heard from the Obama campaign and organic cereal commercials, racism is alive and well.
Do you think it’s racist to have race preferences in the man or woman you date? Are you a racist if you’re not attracted to a certain race? [Blog.OkCupid.com] Keep reading »
Hannah, one of our readers, snapped this in Nassau, Bahamas.
Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send your pic to email@example.com. Keep reading »
I finally ended a friendship I’d had for about 13 years. The woman and I had gotten to a point where we knew very little about each other’s lives because she constantly canceled plans and wouldn’t return phone calls, and I decided I didn’t care to make an effort without some reciprocity. Basically, we had outgrown each other. This means, I’m down to about three girlfriends. One lives in the south. Another lives about two hours away by public transportation and rarely wants to meet somewhere in the middle. And the third is finding herself now that she’s come out. I’m faced with the dilemma of making new girlfriends and the outlook ain’t pretty. Keep reading »