In a recent Savage Love column, Dan Savage made a pretty provocative assertion that “when we marry, we’re signing up to f**k someone at least semiregularly for decades. Not interested in f**king? Don’t marry.” He was responding to a letter from a woman whose husband, despite jerking off to porn three times a week, only had “quasi-forced, strictly missionary” sex with her “at most three times a year.” With an unsatisfied “sex drive of a 16-year-old boy,” she said she was at the point that she was ready to go f**k “a minor-league soccer team.” Savage’s response? She should!
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In my twenties, I dated a guy who was 12 years older than me. In my thirties, I went in the other direction, dating a dude 11 years my junior. (Don’t you dare call me a cougar!) Although both ended rather badly, I feel like that while the gaping age difference didn’t directly cause either relationship’s demise, it certainly didn’t help. Mostly because I wasn’t very graceful about handling it.
So, learn from my mistakes. Whichever way your May/December relationship skews, there are certain pitfalls you should do your best to avoid. Keep reading »
Reader Charlotte West sent us this photo taken in Vilnius, Lithuania. “When couples get married,” she told us, “they attach a lock to the Uzupis Bridge and throw the key into the river below.” We can’t stop awww-ing. Keep reading for a closeup of the padlock.
Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send your pic to email@example.com.
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I’m very much attracted to a guy who happens to have the same birthday as me (9/11/84 @ 6:30 pm, don’t know his time). After two drunken makeout sessions, I’m very confused because he has been running hot and cold with me for the past two months. We’re friends and I can’t figure out if he’s afraid to make a move for the sake of the friendship or if he’s not interested. I can’t help but think that it’s significant that we share the same birthday, but am I reading too much into it? – Confused Keep reading »
As many of you who have been reading The Frisky for awhile know, I was engaged for much of the site’s lifespan. I was with my fiance for four years when he proposed on New Year’s Eve 2007. I wrote about being engaged for The Frisky in a regular column, “So I’m Engaged.” When he suddenly left me last September, I was, frankly, devastated to the point where I could not get out of bed. I missed a week of work and lost about 10 pounds. I felt absolutely mortified by the existence of those “So I’m Engaged” columns and couldn’t stand the thought of anyone reading them. They felt like the words of someone in a one-sided relationship, and their existence hurt me and embarrassed me. So, I took them down. Keep reading »
I am a woman. I have all the biological requirements to have a child. Yet, I do not have the instincts or rational desire to do so. Does that make me less of a woman to not want to have a child either by using my body, my eggs, or my money to adopt? Keep reading »
A recent article from Men’s Health gives guys five sure-fire signs a woman is into him. Basically, if you’re a lady and so much as breathe the same air as a dude, you probably want to inhale him faster than a piece of chocolate mousse cake. But let’s dissect each sign one by one, shall we? Keep reading »
Shared taste in books, movies, or music can bring two people together. But they can cause tiffs, too, if you don’t share the same preferences. It used to be the debate over who controls the TV remote control was a big deal in a relationship, but as technology has progressed, so have our entertainment-related arguments. In Sunday’s New York Times, writer Michael Wilson considered the battles that wage in households that share a Netflix account. Wilson spoke to couples whose tastes in movies (and watching habits) didn’t mesh, and arguments ensued over who got the next pick in the Netflix queue.
Most of the fights, however, seem to be about how long the couples keep movies without watching them. Louis Marino had “The English Patient” for six months because his wife didn’t want to watch it. They never did see it before sending it back. Tom Smith has decided to limit the amount of time his girlfriend can keep a movie, because she’s really slow about getting to them. Greg Albrecht’s fiancee returns his DVDs after a week, regardless of whether he’s gotten to watch them. The fact that people are setting limits on how long their significant other keeps a movie goes against the whole point of Netflix — that you can get whatever movie you want and keep it until you’re ready to give it back. But why don’t couples just cancel their accounts or move to a less expensive plan if they’re only going to get to one DVD a month? Keep reading »
It was a drizzly night, and I was walking down the street with Luke, my boyfriend at the time, to a comedy club where he was performing that night. He held an umbrella over my head and had his arm wrapped around my shoulder. I should have been giddy, but instead I felt apprehensive. We’d been dating for a few months, but this was the first time I was going to one of his shows.
“So, you’re not going to make fun of me, are you?” I asked, flashing back to Jerry Seinfeld and man hands and close talking. What if he called me out in public on some absurd quirk I never knew existed?
“No,” he said. “That’s a cheap laugh.” His material was more sophisticated, even a touch political, he said.
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