Category Archives: Relationships

Sassy sophisticated relationship advice for real women everywhere: dating advice, love advice, and more!

How To Get Your Wedding Announcement In The New York Times

Wedding season is upon us and one of the many items on a bride and groom’s long to-do/wish list may very well include having their wedding announcement published in the New York Times (or not!). This time last year, when my husband and I were planning a wedding, we figured it was a pretty long shot getting our own announcement published, but we also thought our families — and friends … and future kiddos — would get a kick out of it if we somehow made it happen. Kinda like, “Can you believe the Times actually let those dorks grace its pages?” And you know what? It did! My husband and I are not rich, don’t have particularly impressive pedigrees, didn’t graduate from Ivy League schools, and can’t call ourselves doctors, lawyers or investment bankers (at least, not with a straight face), but the New York Times still published our wedding announcement anyway. And if the Paper of Record can let a couple of average Joes like us into their esteemed wedding section, it’s certainly possible for you to land a coveted slot too. After the jump, check out my tips for getting your wedding announcement published in the New York Times. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I’m A Little Jealous Of Your New Relationship

I want to start this confession with a disclaimer: I have a boyfriend who I have been dating for two and a half years. It is a relationship that I have poured more love, commitment and concern into than any of my previous ones put together, and he does the same. He listens sincerely to all the problems I unload on him, even when it’s the same stale series of issues over and over again. Our biggest fight has only led to about 10 minutes of oh-so-mature silent treatment. We even have embarrassing nicknames for each other that I know better than to publish here. I know I am lucky to have this sort of relationship and I cherish every moment of it. I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Even though Jake Gyllenhaal is my “Get Out of Jail Free” exception, if he came calling in his “Prince of Persia” regalia, I know I couldn’t act on it. Now that has to be love.

And yet, I’m jealous of you—you giggly new couples with your adorably awkward first dates and timid hand-holding. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: Is There Trust After Cheating?

I recently found out that my boyfriend had been sleeping with his married boss. I always had suspicions about their “friendship” and little details just started to come together, making the puzzle whole. Even though he denied it at first, he finally admitted to the infidelity. He said that that last time he slept with her was when we first started casually dating and he hasn’t since then. I really like him, may even love him, but how do I trust him now, especially when he’s around her all of the time? His place of employment is not just a job to him, but a career, so he’s afraid he’ll lose his job if anyone found out, which is his excuse for initially lying to me about it. I want to work through this, but I don’t know how I can trust him anymore. — Trustless

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The 5 Biggest Relationship Mistakes I Ever Made

“Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep … Wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you’re just as pretty without makeup on. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you … The one who turns to his friends and says, ‘That’s her.’” — Unknown

Everyone makes mistakes in relationships. The trick is not making the same relationship mistakes over and over and over again. I’ve made my share of relationship mistakes along the way. Here are mine, so you don’t have to make them. Keep reading »

Love Vandal: Classic Style

Reader Katie sent in this archetypal Love Vandal.

Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send your pic to tips@thefrisky.com. Keep reading »

Does A Firm Handshake Mean She Won’t Sleep With You?

A month or so ago, I was hanging out with two lesbian friends and we happened to meet two of their lesbian friends and the cousin of one of the women, who my friends didn’t know. As we were introducing ourselves, the cousin extended her hand so I could shake it. I thought that was a little formal, but I have manners, so I reached out to grab her hand. I instantly regretted not simply waving. When shaking hands, I firmly hold the person’s palm but not their fingers. I hate a limp handshake. This woman, however, was seriously trying to cause some pain as she squeezed my fingers — I was wearing a huge ring on my index finger that she pressed into my middle finger. My friends had the same experience shaking her hand, except later that night my hand swelled and theirs didn’t.
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Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend Still Frequents A Dating Site”

OK, whoa, sorry for posting that fake letter yesterday. Man, you guys took me to task on that one! That’s OK — I can take it as well as I can dish it. And to make it up to you, I’ve got two (very real) letters today. Read on…

My boyfriend and I have been together for going on five months now and things on the whole are going great. He’s super sweet, thoughtful, kind, and affectionate, genuinely enjoys spending time with me, and even at this early stage he’s hinted to me that he can see this relationship continuing for a while. The problem is we met on an online dating site and he’s still listed as single on there. Not only that, but he still logs in pretty frequently (about two or three times a day). Admittedly, I go on there quite a bit too, but I’ve been listed as “seeing someone” for about a month, so there’s no ambiguity about my only being there for a little “window shopping,” if you will. I know he’s not seeing anyone else — I trust him, and frankly, I don’t see how he would have the time anyway. But I’m just worried that deep down he thinks I’m not enough for him and that he’s hoping to meet someone even better. We joke about the site all the time and tease each other whenever one of us happens to see that the other has gotten a new message, but there’s this tiny part of me that’s worried that he’ll actually act on it. I know this is a really stupid and petty thing to be worried about but somehow I can’t let it stop bothering me. How can I ask him about this without seeming super clingy or like a web stalker? Or should I just try and forget about it? — Well-Matched

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Have You Ever Been On The Sex Diet?

I can’t tell you how many diets I’ve been on in my life. The grapefruit diet, the cookie diet, the no-sugar diet, the no-carbs diet, the Atkins diet, the raw diet, the juice diet, Weight Watchers, Nutrisystem, and too many more to list. While I’ve never been terrifically skinny or incredibly overweight, I’ve definitely vacillated in the 20-pounds zone. Sometimes, I’m up. Sometimes, I’m down. Mostly, I go in phases. For years, I’m very good. Other times, I am very bad. In the long run, it does seem like diets don’t really work. You lose it, but it tracks you down and finds you again. I have found one pretty fail-safe method over the years, though. And that’s the sex diet. Keep reading »

30 Things That Make A Woman Feel Beautiful

Look, I’m not going to deny how great it can feel when a man tells a woman she’s beautiful (or any word that’s like “beautiful,” for that matter) — especially if it’s someone she’s equally attracted to/interested in/likes/loves/respects/cares for. As for being told her body’s hot by someone she’s just met? Well, let’s just say we seem to have a difference of opinion on the matter. For the record, I think any mention of a woman’s bod right off the bat is totally creepy and inappropriate, but I respect that some of you disagree. What we can all agree on, though, (I hope!) is that there are lots more things that make a woman feel beautiful than simply being told so by a guy. Check out 30 of those things after the jump. Keep reading »

Dealbreaker: He Was Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde

Chris brought me flowers every week. Chris wined and dined me and took me on spontaneous romantic getaways. Chris called when he said he would, made plans in advance, opened doors, and held hands. But when he wasn’t doing all of those things, Chris was also kind of an a**hole.

There is a moment in every doomed-to-fail union when your relationship jumps the shark, whether you know it or not. Maybe he forgets to calls one time too many or cancels again. Maybe you just wake up one day and realize you’re tired of his face. For me, that moment with Chris came when I told him that my work schedule would make it impossible to hang out for a couple of days. On the brink of a giant promotion, I was coming in early and staying late, and I warned him I would be too busy to grab dinner in the coming 72 hours.

It is a nice feeling when your boyfriend expresses interest in seeing you often and is disappointed when you can’t get together. It’s most certainly not a nice feeling to sit and watch in horror as a grown 36-year-old man gets red in the face, curls his lips into an exaggerated pout, stamps his feet, and makes whining sounds. Keep reading »

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