• Relationships

Girl Talk: My Marriage Is A Secret

The true nature of my relationship ambivalence became apparent a few months ago, when a colleague at a work event asked my partner and me if we were married. I shrugged in my typical fashion, looked at the floor, and muttered, “Yeah.” My coworker nodded, then did a double take. “Wait, did you just say yes?” he asked, incredulous that I would seem so unconcerned about asserting my legal and romantic status. I laughed, as did my partner. It isn’t that we aren’t thrilled to be together. We just don’t care if you know it. Keep reading »

Love Vandal: Guts Are Good

Reader Molly snapped this on a beach in Victoria, British Columbia: “My two boys (ages 8 and 9) asked me, ‘Mommy, is loving someone’s guts a bad thing?’ ”

Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send your pic to tips@thefrisky.com. Keep reading »

Dater X: I Am Done With Dating

You haven’t heard from me in a while. Apologies for the radio silence. Here is why I haven’t felt compelled to write lately: For the past three months I have been stuck in the same pattern.

  • Step 1: Vibe with a guy at a party/bar/online and make plans for a date.
  • Step 2: Go on said date and either (a) have an ick time and end things there or (b) have a great time and set up a date two, three, etc.
  • Step 3: As dating continues, get to know and like said person. Usually start sleeping with them circa date four.
  • Step 4: Have an awkward or unsettling talk/phone call/email exchange with said person that makes one or both of us question our potential as partners.
  • Step 5: We decide not to see each other anymore.

And thus, I am left with a G-Chat bar full of guys who, for a short period of time, I talked to constantly—but who I wouldn’t dare to message now or probably ever again. Their names in my phone just seem like a cruel reminder of how hard it is to find someone you could actually have a relationship with.

And so I have decided that I, Dater X, cannot date anymore. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My Friend Called ‘Dibs’ On A Guy We’re Both Interested In”

One of my close friends introduced me to a guy friend of hers recently, and we had immediate chemistry. He’s smart and quick-witted, with big green eyes, and we’re both passionate about our work and have lots in common. The catch (because there has to be one…) is that my friend who introduced us has “dibs.” To my friend, he’s the perfect guy — on paper. They are from the same hometown, are the same religion and he has a of graduate degree like she does. She has also mentioned to me a number of times that he comes from a wealthy family, and while she works now, she would like to be with someone who could amply support her when she has children. In essence, he’s her ideal man, except that in the years that they have known each other (and despite her efforts) he has made it quite clear he’s not interested in being more than friends. The guy has no idea my friend has called dibs on him, and has made it clear he would like to get to know me better. I would like to pursue the romance, but not at the expense of my friendship. Now I feel resentment toward my friend for making it clear she would be furious if we dated. Everyone involved is 30 or nearly so, and at a point where a serious relationship could become a lifetime commitment; I feel like we’re not kids anymore, and the games aren’t helping anyone be happier. So, does calling “dibs” ever stop being acceptable, and if so, how do I help my friend be happy for both of us instead of feeling betrayed? — Down on the Dibs

Keep reading »

25 Reasons Why Men Cheat

This week, everybody’s talking about cheating, all because Jesse James decided to step out on wife Sandra Bullock with a tattooed, white supremacist stripper named Michelle McGee. Now, what everyone wants to know is: Why. James had it all: a beautiful, successful, talented wife, a booming business and fame, a family… Nevertheless, something led him astray. After the jump, 25 reasons men put their willies where they don’t belong. Keep reading »

Why You Should Date Your Best Friend

There’s nothing quite like feeling a spark of attraction between you and someone you just met. Lately though, we’ve been wondering whether it’s better to date a friend, or at least somebody we’ve known longer than just a couple of weeks, and who knows more about us than just our name and phone number. Sure, the transition from friend-to-boyfriend might feel a little sticky at first, but here are five benefits that overrule the awkwardness: Keep reading »

Poll: Does Cheating Make A Person Uglier?

Does cheating make someone "ugly"?

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Dear Wendy: “My Best Friend Keeps Falling For Jerks”

I have known my best friend since we were six years old and she’s a great girl. She’s super smart, pretty, and fun, so obviously she has a lot to offer a guy. A few years ago, her boyfriend (who she referred to as the love of her life) moved to another continent, and while they tried to deal with the distance as best they could, they eventually broke up. In the years since their breakup she’s made some pretty horrible decisions when it comes to guys. And it’s not just that I don’t like the guys she’s dated. She let’s them walk all over her. She hasn’t made the safest decisions when it comes to her sex life either. At first I thought she was just going through a bad boy phase. She’d find a new guy and gush about him all the time, then call me in tears. I’ve picked up the pieces more times than I can count, and I try to support her, but I feel like it’s come to a point where I can’t watch her put herself through it anymore. I want to confront her about it, but I don’t want to seem like I’m scolding her. What should I do? — Over the Drama

Keep reading »

365 Days In Paris: Poser Un Lapin

I got posed a rabbit. And I am not happy about it.

That is to say that Pierre m’a posé un lapin, which is the expression for getting stood up. (Don’t ask me what rabbits have to do with it.)

Technically, no, I didn’t go somewhere and wait around for no one to show up, but what happened Friday night was just as disappointing. Keep reading »

Dealbreaker: The Moralizer

James was the boyfriend who did everything right.

He asked me out first, and asked me out again the very next day. He didn’t play games. He called if he’d be late, if he missed me, just to say hello. He listened patiently. He dressed well. He told me I was beautiful whether I was opera-ready in a ballgown or sweaty from a day-long hike. He’d plan lavish marathon dates with rooftop picnics or bonfires on the beach. He was tall, athletic, and good-looking. He held the door for women, and not just the attractive ones. He loved me.

My friends approved. My brother hung out with him. My parents loved him. James, it seemed, was good enough for everyone.

But no one was good enough for James. Keep reading »

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