So you’ve finally found The One (or at least The One For The Foreseeable Future) and you’ve committed to a serious relationship. Now what? In our weekly column, Life After Dating, women discuss the unique joys and challenges of coupledom.
When I was single and dating people who were definitely not right for me, I would often go to coupled friends for advice. They’d respond to my list of complaints that “he didn’t like to read books” or “he wanted to spend an unnatural amount of time with his guy friends, is he gay?” with platitudes like, “When you love someone you accept them exactly as they are” or “I wouldn’t change a thing about so and so.”
I took them at their word, thinking that when I was dating the right person someday, all of his flaws and all of my impulses to want to change or fix would magically fade away. I am finally dating the right person and can say with certainty that my coupled friends weren’t giving it to me straight. Perhaps they were simplifying it for me in a way that I could understand, or maybe they were lying. Either way, I think it’s less about accepting your partner’s inability to be on time, or his habit of making pasta at 2 a.m., and more that your love for him allows you to overlook these foibles. Because, let’s face it, you are anal about street clothes making contact with your sheets, you watch TV at a terribly loud volume and you might have an issue with hoarding beauty supplies. You are so grateful that he overlooks these things. Keep reading »
Generally, honesty is a good policy, but sometimes life calls for you to fake it. Not to the point of self-delusion or denial, just long enough to get through or get by. Occasional faking doesn’t make you a liar, an impostor, or a fraud, it makes you smart. Strutting in to the interview for your dream job exuding confidence when you really feel like a quivering pile of insecurity, for example, is not just smart, but necessary. From feigning surprise when you learn the big secret you already knew about to pretending to love your mother-in-law’s beef stroganoff, here are a few things that are completely and totally OK to fake. Keep reading »
Pisces (February 20-March 20): The mental fog will clear and you’ll be able to make sense of everything. So, get back into the swing of things by following your impulses faster and harder than ever, and trust they’ll bring you the best results. The less you plan, the better you will be, as who you wake up as will feel like a total 180 from who you’ll be when you go to bed. Think sweet to sultry, and all will be bright.
Best Day To Get Lucky: Tuesday, March 18 Keep reading »
There’s more to being ready to be in a committed relationship than a combination of emotional preparedness and luck: it turns out that there are certain traits that can predict whether someone is going to cohabit or marry. Keep reading »
Moving in together is a big step. Does it make things better or worse? How soon is too soon? Does it lead to breakups — or worse, the D word? Well, a recent study shows that premarital cohabitation isn’t linked with divorce — at all. In fact, the research out of University of North Carolina, Greensboro shows that two-thirds of new marriages in the United States start with cohabitation. Phew. But that doesn’t mean it’s all hearts and roses. Read more on Your Tango…
Our open mindedness to friends-with-benefits lifestyles is coming around, once again, to bite us in the bum. A new study reveals that 60 percent of newlyweds have slept with at least two guests invited to their wedding. You might think this is normal enough, considering typically everyone has at least one ex and sometimes people remain friends with their exes, but the next statistic I’m about to lay on you makes this whole thing a little more scandalous. Read more on College Candy…
At my boutique job, I see a lot of guys shopping with their wives and girlfriends. Some of them are amazing shopping partners, helping their ladies pick out cute dresses and offering helpful feedback in the dressing room. Some of them are completely disengaged, plopping down on a chair immediately upon entering the store and grunting one-syllable responses when prompted, never looking up from their iPhones. And the rest are … less than pleasant: sighing dramatically, making snide comments, complaining constantly. Listen, you don’t have to love going shopping (lord knows we hate it half the time), but if you do agree to accompany your lady to the mall, you might as well try to make the best of it. Here are a few dos and don’ts to help you be the best shopping partner you can be… Keep reading »
“I’m sooo busy!”
I’m soooo over this phrase. So over it I want to throw something when a person says it. Usually at them. I’m sooo busy is code for, “I don’t care enough about you to remember to text or call or see you.” Telling someone you’re sooo busy isn’t an excuse. It’s an insult.
You know who’s busy? Doctors. Doctors are busy. You know who else? New mothers. I would not trade places with them for a minute. Everyone else? Nope. You’re really not that busy.
We all want to think we’re that busy. But, we’re usually busy playing Candy Crush or perusing other people’s “busy” lives on Facebook or watching “Scandal.” We’ve become too lazy to pick up the phone and get back to someone. Keep reading »
Today is March 14th, Pi Day, and in honor of this nerdiest of holidays, we thought we’d help you infuse some math swagger into your flirting game. Because come on, what is sexier than math? Nothing. Nothing is sexier than math. Here are 10 pickup lines sure to charm your way into a hot date, or at least score you a sexy romp on your horizontal axis, if you know what we mean…