I bounded down the stairs to show my mom my new frilly red dress. 

“Oh Kimmi! You look so pretty! That is such a pretty red dress!”

I stopped mid-twirl, put my hands on my four-year-old hips, and looked at her accusingly. “You don’t like my blue dress?” I asked.

Flash-forward 30 years, and that easily hurt, overly dramatic little girl has become an easily hurt, overly dramatic woman. I’m not sure why, but I have always jumped to conclusions and distorted the truth, turning compliments into insults and finding ways to feel slighted in any kind of situation or exchange. 

“What are you up to tomorrow night?” The Juggler asked me last Tuesday morning. We were on the train to work, as had become our routine over the past two weeks. He held the pole with one hand, his other wrapped around my back, playing with the ends of my hair.

“It’s my cousin’s birthday party. Ugh,” I said, imagining how much I would rather be staying up into the wee hours of the night going from foreplay to sex, foreplay to sex, as had also become our routine, than twiddling my thumbs at a party with my family. I searched my head for the next evening I didn’t have plans. “But I’m free Friday,” I said.

“Cool,” he said, giving me a lingering kiss that totally turned me on again, before sliding out of the subway doors. “I’ll talk to you before then.”

Only he didn’t.

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Parent Trap” whose live-in boyfriend’s children were spending the summer with them and getting on her last nerve. “I feel like I have no space, all my stuff is moved around, no food is ever in the fridge and worst of all, all they want to do is play with me! I mean it’s great that they love me and accept me in their lives and all but I’m starting to resent them,” she wrote. She said it was starting to affect her relationship with her boyfriend, that he questioned her ability to have a child of her own one day, and that she was even considering breaking up with him because of the kids. So, did she break up with him? Did they figure out a way to make time for their relationship while caring for the kids full-time? Find out all after the jump.

Reader Jeremiah sent in this beautifully photographed piece of love graffiti. He wrote: “This can be located in Offenbach a.M., Germany along some train tracks. I drive past it every day and thought it would fit nicely with the Love Vandal collection. It has been there for months.”

Have you seen graffiti that’s kind of sweet (even if it is against the law)? Send your pic to tips@thefrisky.com.

A couple weeks ago, I posted a list of 15 signs you’re just friends to help those of you in male-female friendships determine whether your pal is strictly a pal and nothing more. If you’re still feeling a little unsure what the status of your relationship is, maybe today’s list will help you a little more. After the jump, 15 signs you’re more than just friends (or friends with benefits).

In my early 20s, I wore size 24 jeans and my enormous boobs demanded an H-cup bra, a letter no woman should have to associate with lingerie sizing. I couldn’t fit into restaurant booths or through the subway turnstile. I even once held up an entire roller coaster ride at Six Flags so I could get back onto the platform when the seat belt wouldn’t buckle around me—a character-building experience to say the least. I’d dropped out of college, didn’t have any job prospects and I was in a serious romantic relationship with a man who was actually gay (and a little nuts). It was a dark, lonely time in my life mired in lots of bong-hitting and double-cheeseburgering. 

After surprising myself by punching said gay boyfriend in the mouth one night during a screaming match (to which he responded by pulling my hair for 20 minutes – so gay!), I met my own ugly rock bottom. What came next was a brief stint as a homeless, fat girl living out of her Honda. There was, as they say, nowhere else to go but up. 

One of my first really serious adult relationships happened when I was in my early- to mid-20s. We ended things after about three years, two of which we spent living together, and although our breakup was extremely heart-wrenching and hurtful, over the years we have been able to develop a much stronger relationship as friends. When he started dating his current girlfriend last summer, I wasn’t surprised when I didn’t hear from him as much (previously we had been hanging out an average of twice a week, sometimes more) because sometimes that’s just how things go when you meet someone new. But as the six month mark passed and my conversations with him were few and far between, I began to wonder what the deal was. He confided in me that his girlfriend had trust issues — MAJOR ones. (She was checking his browsing history on his computer, she made him de-friend me on Facebook, and every time he brought up my name or made an attempt to hang out with me, an argument would ensue.) They’ve been dating a year now and I’ve still never met her. The last time I talked to him — we’ve managed to see each other a handful of times since he started dating his girlfriend — he mentioned that he is thinking of proposing. I would like for his girlfriend to get the chance to know me. Additionally, I know my ex misses our friendship and still cares about me deeply, enough so that he has always stuck up for me and made sure she understood that her jealousy and trust issues were HERS, and not caused by anything I did. Should I make an attempt to befriend his girlfriend so that she becomes more comfortable with me? — The Ex

OK, so I know that this site, Pink Kisses, is designed to help women get over bad breakups. But something about it is so horribly Scary Sadshaw, so terribly desperate and faux “you go girl” that I actually feel more depressed now that I’ve seen this clip. The service aims to help women recover from failed relationships, because “moving on is the best revenge” (actually, the saying is, “living well is the best revenge,” but whatever) and, for a fee, will send you a basket of crap to make you feel better about your breakup. I don’t know, but I think trying to make a buck on women who are dealing with breakups seems a little, well, tacky. Then again, we all need a bouquet of roses every once in a while.

What if you found out the man (or woman) of your dreams was dying of an incurable illness? Would you stay, or would you go? This weekend the New York Times Modern Love column brought to light a real-life dilemma for thousands of people: What happens when it turns out the love of your life has a terminal illness? Written by writer Kerri Sandburg, “On the Precipice, Wings Spread” follows the author’s 18-year relationship with an HIV-positive man.

I am a 41-year-old professional man married to a beautiful woman. For the past few years I have felt that there has to be more to life than what I’ve been living as it’s been the same thing day in and day out for the past 10 years. I’ve never cheated on my wife, but I just need something more, and I think that could be it. My wife doesn’t like to have sex that often, but I need it every day, and although I would love to talk to her, I’m the type of person who doesn’t speak up or say anything. I have just been so depressed and I feel like I have given up on things. I did take medication, but it made me feel empty and very tired every day, so I gave it up and now I’m so depressed I’m not sure what to do. I just feel like if I could have another woman just one time that I would feel better, but the guilt would eat me up. Not sure why I feel like another woman would help, but I’m just drawn in that direction. I know you would say don’t do it—even though I feel like I need to—but what if I don’t do it, what can I do to feel better? — Married and Unhappy

Last week I posted nine “life tips” I plan to pass down to any potential kids I may have some day. You readers commented with some of your own tips—which most of us would be wise to heed. After the jump, 15 of your best life tips.

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Pregnant and Terrified” whose booty call friend got her pregnant. She knew she wanted to get an abortion, but wasn’t sure she should tell her casual sex partner for fear of freaking him out or scaring him off. She also worried he’d be against abortion and would try to talk her out of terminating the pregnancy. I told her that scaring him shouldn’t be her concern and that “he’s as responsible for the pregnancy as you are so there’s no reason you should feel the need to sugar-coat the news or soften the shock.” I also told her to explain that she felt he deserved to know, but that it’s her body and she’s decided to get an abortion. So, did she tell him the news? Did he freak out or was he there for her? Find out after the jump.

I was in my early 20s, living in New York City and barely scraping by. Even though I was making ends meet by some combination of waiting tables/temping/focus groups, I still always had enough money to pay my rent and indulge in highly caloric, fruity martinis. Before I was on my own, my father instilled in me the importance of monitoring my money so I never overdrafted my measly bank account or bounced one of those fairy checks I was so excited to order.

Virgo (August 23-September 22)
Sorry to say you are going to be your own worst enemy this week, as somehow you’ll be weighing out the wrong pros and cons to get to your answers. However, try all you might, you know the right answer is in that nagging pit inside your stomach that you just have to deal with. Life sometimes isn’t that pretty and right now is one of those moments. CONTINUE READING ...

So there’s this guy that I have had a major crush on for about five years now.  His birthday is Feb. 9 (Aquarius), and my birthday is Sept. 24 (Libra).  I’ve gotten quite a few signs from him that he is interested in me, but seeing as we are both rather shy, neither of us have done anything.  So my question is, is there anything that I can do to encourage him to do something, or is there anything in particular that I can do that would ... entice him, for lack of a better word, or even sort of draw him in?  I don’t see him much anymore, but I have him as a friend on Facebook, so I have some access to what’s going on in his life.  Like I said, I’ve liked this guy for about five or six years now and I’m tired of this game we’ve been playing.  I look at him; he looks away. He looks at me and I look away.  We seem to have lots in common personality wise. We’re both kind of sarcastic and we both have the same sense of humor, but we are also both kind of shy, which makes this sort of thing kind of difficult.  Plus, neither of us have had a lot of experience with the opposite sex.  Anyway, what should I do? —Nat