If there are a million ways to do something wrong, there should be at least a few ways to do a thing right. In this series, Janet and Emily tackle your questions from two different perspectives. The result, we hope, is two right answers.
Janet is a stone-cold rationalist, baker, and monotreme from Australia. Her boobs played the field briefly before marrying themselves off to a skier-dude. Emily is from the Midwest, and is a single, straight, agnostic, whiskey-drinking softball player who’d love to use her Pinterest wedding board before all the pics go out of style. Both Janet and Emily are writers and comedians in New York.
Hi, not to be uncool, but my problem has to do with the return of “Game of Thrones.” The show is super violent, so I’m not particularly into it, but my boyfriend insists on watching it live that night. The thing is I think he’s only watching it for all the sexy stuff that happens in the show. In the season premiere, there was a scene where he yelled at the TV “take it off!” and sure enough, a male character pulled off the robes of all the women in the room like a minute later. He clearly gets excited, he’ll bounce his knee during these scenes. This is a creepy turnoff to me. — No Head For Ned Tonight Keep reading »
In a world filled with online dating, Tinder, Facebook messages, one-night stands, speed dating, match-making and good old-fashioned true love, where’s a hot bitch to turn to for solid dating advice? Well, why not history? Sure, names and dates and technology changes over time, but human nature doesn’t. If we look back at some hot bitches in history, we can figure out timeless ways to turn a hottie’s head or learn from the devastating mistakes of breakups gone by.
[Illustration of 17th century couple via Shutterstock]
The Otherhood: a growing population of educated, professional women in their 30s and 40s who have yet to find love or start a family. In fact, statistics show that almost 50 percent of American women are childless — yet our society still isn’t quite sure how to treat these women, placing all sorts of assumptions and opinions on them without truly understanding their decisions.
Enter Melanie Notkin, the successful founder of Savvy Auntie and a vocal representation of this demographic. Melanie’s new book, Otherhood: Modern Women Finding A New Kind Of Happiness, is part memoir and part reflection, digging deep into world of these women and the challenges they face. Keep reading »
The other night when a number I didn’t recognize flashed on my phone, I decided to answer the call and was greeted with a cheerful, “Hey there, it’s Andrew.”
“Andrew?” I replied, clearly confused about who was on the other end of the line. “I’m sorry. Andrew who?”
“From the bar on Saturday night. You gave me your number,” he said, sounding slightly defeated by my forgetfulness.
And then it hit me. I knew exactly who he was. He was my OKCupid run-in. Keep reading »
We knew that some conservatives have a boner for (heterosexual, of course) marriage. But did you know they get equally hard for stopping couples from being able to divorce? As Scott Keyes writes in a must-read piece for The Washington Post, politicians in over a dozen states have introduced bills making it harder for a couple to end their union. Keep reading »
Today is Nick and my 10-year anniversary. TEN YEARS. A decade. One-twentieth of a lifetime if we both live to be 200, which we plan to. I’m not usually super sentimental about anniversaries, if only because I’m like a doofy sitcom husband when it comes to remembering exact dates, but I couldn’t help but get a little reflective and nostalgic last night when I was thinking back on all we’ve been through and all the fun we’ve had. Here are 10 things I’ve learned — about relationships, life, and myself — in the past 10 years. Keep reading »
Aries (March 21-April 19): It’s going to be a nail-biter week, as all parts of your life converge into a moment that has you thinking about things in an utterly drastic way. Chances are there will be a lot of uneasiness to plow through this week, which will mean needing to maintain a resolute attitude. Remind yourself that you are the sign of victory and without one, there is no compromise.
Best Day To Get Lucky: Tuesday, April 15 Keep reading »
As a father of three children, it takes quite a bit of teeth-gritting for me to admit that parents can be the most eye-roll-inducing shitbags on the planet. We don’t mean to be. The problem is that we’ve lived life before kids and we’ve lived life with them, whereas our counterparts have only experienced the former. This makes every kid-related topic that comes out of our mouths sound condescending and patronizing. I don’t think most parents understand that, so on behalf of not-spawn-having people everywhere, allow me to tell parents to shut the fuck up when they consider saying the following. Read more on Cracked…