Happy National Friendship Day! Let’s make it all about Oprah for a moment, shall we? Oprah says in reference to Gayle (and I’m paraphrasing here), “Nothing’s better than a good friend,” and with the notable exception of a perfectly done French fry, I wholeheartedly agree. There’s really nothing better. If you’re living without, I recommend you fix the situation pronto.
That said, I have no intention of instructing you on how to go about that here; I’m out of practice myself, having slipped into a motley crew of lunatics my freshman year of college and having held on tightly to those lunatics for the better part of 15 years. At this stage, new friends come along only once in a long while. And all I can say in terms of how I find them, is that, well, I don’t really. They find me is how it feels: I’m at a social gathering complaining about my facial hair, when suddenly there’s some new gal beside me who’s like, “My issue has always been my hairy lower back.” So you get to talking and fast-forward five years and she’s the one you call crying about the fact that you’re crying about those Jayonce breakup rumors. So again, I’m not here to tell you how to find her; I’m here to tell you how to assess a new lady friend. How to tell if she’s The One. Or, more specifically a Keeper. Keep reading »
It brings me great pleasure to inform you all that I’ve gone on another successful date with Scar Twin. After our first date, where I oh-so-gracefully mimicked JLaw’s Oscars fall on my way up the stairs at the night’s end, I was eager to redeem myself on date No. 2, and I can pretty confidently say that I did. Keep reading »
Like conducting a job search, online dating is an exercise in patience, compatibility, and, sometimes, rejection. It’s not romantic, but to a certain degree, the search for a suitable partner is not unlike the job hunt. You use the internet to varying degrees of success, clicking and writing emails and then clicking some more, and sometimes, if the cards are in your favor and the stars align, you end up meeting a stranger in a public setting and make awkward small talk while wearing shoes that pinch your toes and more makeup than you would for a Tuesday. When it’s over, you’re euphoric or despondent, alternating between mapping out a future for yourself or envisioning waiting for an email that never arrives. You follow up, you wait, things usually don’t pan out. When you do find success, you realize that it came the way most things in life happen — organically, through people you know. Matched with destiny, your future trips happily towards the light.
This is the best case scenario, a situation that everybody assures you will happen, regardless of how dire it all looks. Keep reading »
So, I know I’m a killjoy. I know that people like to say cute things to each other when they’re in love because those things sound good whether or not they make any sense. But I’ve heard a few too rational people saying gross, unthinking things about their SO’s lately, and it makes me fear for their sense.
My boyfriend is a big dope, and I instituted a rule a long time ago that if he was going to say anything brainlessly dramatic or sentimental to me, he had to say it in a dramatic whisper so I could laugh at it. I just don’t like saying or being told things that are not literally true for the sake of it sounding loving, when expressing love truthfully is so much harder but so much better. Here’s a list of some whisper-worthy, saccharine, and not-very accurate gushiness that just needs to stop happening in the way we talk about our partners. Keep reading »
Last weekend, I got a curious email from OKCupid. I have a profile on the site, but rarely log in and haven’t actually messaged with or gone on a date with anyone in months and months. I still get regular emails about having new matches, but this email subject line stood out immediately: “Match % update for [REDACTED USERNAME].” Hmm. The email (above) alerted me that due to “a diagnostic test,” my match percentage with a specific user had been erroneously reported and the two of us were actually 92 percent compatible, as opposed to the previously determined 32 percent. Keep reading »
The past week has been kinda a bummer for me, and I’ve hit the point where I’ll search for a little happiness just about anywhere. When I saw that someone had asked the Reddit community “What is the best feeling in the world?”, I clicked expecting to see a mix of classics (like peeling the protective plastic off of new gadgets) and the obvious sexual things (which, of course, were there).
What I didn’t expect was to have my heart basically melt out of my body by one user’s completely spot-on list of 86 absolutely perfect pleasures. Read them all on College Candy…
Being the youngest in a large family has its advantages: My siblings provided plenty of grandchildren already, so there’s no pressure on me to make more. (Christmas presents are expensive, y’all.) My family has also known since I was 19 — when I fainted while watching my older sister have a sonogram because it grossed me out so much — that I’m not sure this childbirth thing is for me. So, even after being married for 10 months now, no one in my family has broached the subject of bringing a Bogdanovs-Wakeman into the world.
That being said, minding-one’s-own-beeswax doesn’t hold true with outsiders — as I found out this weekend when a trip to the laundromat turned into more than I’d bargained for. Keep reading »
We’re feeling a little misty-eyed thinking about true love. Maybe it really does exist, you know? Despite the odds and everything. Maybe there’s more to life than playing the field. Well, you can create your own relationship success by looking for the right traits in a woman instead of just swiping right on everyone on Tinder. Let’s take a look at the top 10 things in a significant other that’ll make for a lasting relationship. Read all 10 traits on TResSugar…
For a senior engineering project, a team of students at Hope College in Michigan created an engagement ring box with a tiny camera in it for filming proposals. Now their Ring Cam is taking off as an actual business. When their prototype was still in development, the students asked some of their friends who were getting engaged to try out the camera and film the moment when their now-fiancees said yes. When the team saw the emotional videos the Ring Cam had captured, they knew they had created something special. “It’s definitely one of the most important moments in a couple’s relationship, and to be able to share that instantly with all your friends and family, and actually show them the moment and his or her actual reaction, the genuine surprise, and giddiness — it’s wonderful,” Scott Brandonisio told WZZM News. The creators even took the Ring Cam to an open-call audition for “Shark Tank,” the reality show for aspiring entrepreneurs, though there’s no word yet on whether they’ll head to the next round and make it on the show. Keep reading »
This January, I had a bad job interview. I performed the best I could, but they’d kept me in a room, coming in groups of two or three at a time, grilling me on why I wanted and was qualified for an entry-level customer service job for two straight hours. I’ve been employed in some way or another for the last ten years, and I graduated with honors last year. I couldn’t just say, “I need a better job than I have now, and frankly this is going to be a cakewalk for me.” Some of them said I was underqualified; some of them said I was overqualified. No one really seemed to have a real sense of what they were doing; HR was out for the day, so it was all sales managers. I was so upset and confused afterward that I sat in Merchandise Mart crying for a half hour before working up the courage to get on the train. Keep reading »