Living with other human beings is hard. Like really hard. And sometimes if it’s your best friend, it’s even harder. How do you tell someone you love that they need to do their own dishes and turn the TV volume down and stop having loud sex every single night.
We feel you. In fact, we are you and that’s why we’re giving you some solutions. Read more…
Smack dab in the middle of wet, cold February might not seem like the ideal time for exploring the great outdoors, but if you’re looking for a memorable Valentine’s Day experience, throw on a coat and drag your sweetheart outside. Whether you take a walk through a park, hit up a hiking trail, skip stones on a raging river (good luck), or brave a stormy beach, you’ll be in for an adventure, and you won’t have to worry about fighting the crowds at Olive Garden. Jump in puddles, take pictures, get thoroughly cold and uncomfortable, then head home and get warm together (if you know what I mean). Here is everything you need for a perfectly imperfect outdoorsy Valentine’s Day date… Keep reading »
Not only is February the most barren time of year for decent movies, but it’s when the studios pull out their big guns and aim for our hearts like Cupid with a bazooka and dollar signs in his little cherub eyes. There’s always room for guilty popcorn and Twizzler pleasures, but if you’re craving something a little more complex — Truffles with sea salt! Dutch liquors that taste of delicate cakes and roses! A Bea Arthur from Big Gay Ice Cream! — I’ve got some treats for you.
Most couples book weekend getaways to get closer to their partner. But for some, a stay at a “Divorce Hotel” will finally tear them apart forever and at a bargain price! In the Netherlands, “divorce hotels” are allowing couples to arrange divorces over the course of a weekend complete with legal documentation! During the stay, couples meet with a mediator and a series of do-it-all lawyers who split assets, agree on alimony payments and arrange visitation rights for a single fixed fee. Keep reading »
Alright, gents, the holiday of all holidays is upon us. That’s right, the heart shaped mongoose has stretched its legs, and like the lazy lion relying on the hunt, we need to chase after it. But there’s nothing worse than running after the rodent only to find out that’s it’s a goddamned rat. While Valentine’s Day itself may be a little slice of heaven, the days that follow threaten a year’s worth of love. When our girlfriends talk amongst themselves and it’s revealed that your Duane Reade chocolates were trumped by Jerry’s box of Godiva truffles. Or your dinner and a movie was nothing compared to Sam’s tickets to Carnegie Hall’s “Concert For Lovers.” Out goes any of the goodwill you get for making any effort at all. What I’m suggesting is ground rules, boys. Yes, ground rules. So we all can get on the same page, and no one comes out smelling like a long-stem rose. Here are my proposed V-Day gift-giving guidelines to level the playing field … Keep reading »
We have a clear winner here for worst Valentine’s Day gift idea known to man. And I thought “I love you from top to bottom” toilet paper was bad. Dude, no need to burden yourself with my funeral arrangements. Just in case you were seduced by this convincing ad, “Surprise honey, I got you a coffin!” is not gonna go over well with your woman. [Sci-fi Win]
I often have memory loss, except it’s not due to a car accident as it is for Rachel McAdams’s character, “Paige,” in the soon to be released movie “The Vow”; mine is voluntary. When my husband, Neil, and I had a few chinks in our newlywed armor, we decided to enlist a little help getting past what ailed us and found a marriage counselor who practiced short-term couples therapy. Dr. Get Right To The Point laid it out: decide if you really want to be in the relationship. If so, accept the reality that couples fight, disagree, annoy each other from time to time and generally piss each other off. Then, develop amnesia.
Neil got on board from the get-go, as he’s not much for grudge holding. “A waste of time and energy,” he called it. But the therapist clearly had no idea with whom he was dealing when it came to me. Not only did I have a memory like a steel trap, I held on to every infraction, cruel word and perceived slight with a vice grip. After the jump, how I learned to forget to save my marriage. Keep reading »
Yes, dating and relationships can be hard, but just be glad you’re not a porcupine. Or a dolphin. Or any of the other animals we’ve found with strange and somewhat disturbing mating rituals. At least your boyfriend doesn’t DIE when he has sex with you, like the honey bee, or try to insert his penis into your abdomen, like the bed bug. Click through to read all about it. Keep reading »
In my life, I’ve received enough bad advice to print out and gift wrap Mount Everest. Everyone is quick to offer it, regardless of whether you asked or not … and with so much coming in, it’s hard to separate genuine wisdom from verbal toilet paper. The problem is that you won’t ever know the answer to that until your problem is over, when you can say, “OK, Chad was right. Punching a bull in the nuts isn’t a good idea.” Or, “Greg is full of shit. Punching them more only made him angrier.”
I’ve, admittedly, never been an authority on advice, but what I can do is warn you who to be wary of. Read more…
Sorry to be the wet blanket, everyone. But Valentine’s Day cards that joke about stalkers? Not really funny. There’s a bunch of stalker cards like this one for sale on Zazzle.com, including a particularly disturbing one that says “Be Mine” spelled out in blood above a heart made out of a razor blade. I have a pretty irreverent sense of humor, but I don’t see any humor in joking about violence. Stalking is creepy and scary to people who actually live through it. There’s better ways to be funny if you want to fly your freak flag this Valentine’s Day. [Zazzle.com]
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