Why Do You Have Sex?

melsie0381
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:25 pm: [report]

Well, I know that I have sex because it makes me feel amazing and I love the intimacy it creates with my partner. Afterwards, it feels like we could do anything! It’s the greatest high out there and if I EVER have sex for any of those reasons that are in that book, I think I just might give up on life…

skywalk
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:25 pm: [report]

Yeah WTF?

writergirl
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:27 pm: [report]

Because I want to….

Perceptible
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:35 pm: [report]

Only to procreate, as god intended.

NOT!

Riley
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:36 pm: [report]

I have sex because I paid for the whole 10 minutes and I’m getting my money’s worth.

jeccabean
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:37 pm: [report]

I read this article on another site and I was astonished. They must have found some really deprived women. I have sex because I LIKE it.

pinkjellyfish
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:37 pm: [report]

Because it feels amazing and I enjoy it! “..most women do not find most men sexually attractive at all”? That does sound a little hard to believe. Personally, I sometimes have extremely horny moods where almost every man I see looks like a tasty piece of meat Boy, do I need a boyfriend…

thegr8brownie
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:49 pm: [report]

I’m not sure you gals are understanding that statistic. Most men find the majority of women sexually attractive, while most women do not find most men sexually attractive. Meaning, men will hump just about anything, women will not. That stat doesn’t say that women are not attracted to guys.

And I BET that these 1000 girls (which is a typical sample group) is a pretty good indication of why the majority of women have sex. I’m sure age and income level and moral backgrounds and etc. play a huge role in the reason that many of you may not be thinking about.

@Ami, how old are you, and did you even read this book? You sound pretty sure of everything to be knocking it so hard.

One Big Voice
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:51 pm: [report]

“because my prom date said he was going to roll over and fall asleep unless I did it with him. Kind of date rape-y, right?”

You poor dear! I can see how you had no other choice, faced with that awful decision: have sex with that guy or ... um,not?

FAIL

lilrockgoddess4u
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:53 pm: [report]

The reason I have sex 95$% of the time is b/c I want to get off and am too lazy to do it myself. The other 5% of the time its to please my man.

pinksatinsheets
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:58 pm: [report]

I have never had sex out of anything but desire. I think my appetite is kinda big, because it sounds like a lot of people have sex to please their partner, whereas I’ve never done this, because I’m pretty much always up for it… My guy and I have been together just two years, so maybe my appetite will dwindle down in the coming years…

belligerentjane
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:58 pm: [report]

In hopes that he’ll finish on my face.

kristy1584
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 01:59 pm: [report]

Bc I love it and its wonderful and addicting and feels great and relaxes me…I do have sex when I have a headache too bc it does make it go away and its much faster than excedrine! ha! Plus its a good workout too!! The best (and most fun) way to burn calories!!

ootie
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:11 pm: [report]

I think the biggest reasons for me would be (not in order)....
1. Because I want to have some fun
2. Because I’m horny
3. Because I want to feel close to my boyfriend
4. Because my boyfriend wants to have sex
5. Because I’m in bed but not that sleepy
6. Because I’m wearing cute undies and want to show them off

hlnbabe
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:20 pm: [report]

@thegr8brownie: I agree with you. I think most men find attractiveness almost all women, where women do not necessarily find ALL men to be attractive. I also think you hit the nail on the head with variances in economic, moral, and societal arenas.

@Ami: I initially reacted like yourself. I always have sex because I think it’s awesome and I love it. But I also thought for a minute. I thoroughly enjoy sex, but I can look at a few times in the past where even if I said it’s because I was horny, I was really just being insecure and had underlying reasons. If you interview a diverse group of women from different situations, you’re bound to find a lot of people who may not be as “enlightened” about sex. Moreover, I think if most women really think hard about it, they’ll realize even the strongest of us have had sex for reasons beyond our brazen appetites.

hlnbabe
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:23 pm: [report]

@ootie: 5 & 6… loves it! Sometimes just cause I finally shaved my legs!

Queen Frostine
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:31 pm: [report]

Who has sex for presents? Are they good presents?

ootie
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:31 pm: [report]

@hlnbabe: ahaha I totally do that as well. The same reason as when I’m wearing cute underwear as when I just shaved—I don’t want it to go to waste!

ootie
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:32 pm: [report]

@Queen Frostine: good question.  I don’t think any amount of sex would inspire my boyfriend to get me a present. Except maybe a new bottle of lube or something.

brandyalexander
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:34 pm: [report]

@OneBigVoice: Completely agree, that quote is ridiculous. 

@thegr8brownie: I agree with this statistic as well.  As a woman, I probably find about 5% of men to be sexually attractive. 

Oh, and I have sex because:
1. I am horny.
2. I am horny.

impoddity
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:35 pm: [report]

@pinkjellyfish:  i know how you feel.  Walking around a university everyday with hawt 20-somethings only exacerbates the “condition”.

hlnbabe
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:36 pm: [report]

@ootie: exactly! haha!

spatula
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 02:49 pm: [report]

OK, I think the statistic may be pretty accurate. Let’s face it, we ladies are more visually appealing than men, in general. We care more (usually). Also, I think it’s easier for females to be considered ‘sexually attractive’ than it is for males. (because, as someone mentioned, most men will hump damn near anything)

That said, I have only ever had sex because i reeeallyyyy wanted to.

Lynn
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 03:16 pm: [report]

I must be missing out because I don’t recall ever getting sex presents!

Anyway, I’m wondering if this book claims that women *mostly* have sex for those dumb reasons, or if they *sometimes* do. I usually have sex because I’m horny, but there has been a couple times when I’ve done it because the guy wanted it and I just gave in because it was easier than having him get mad at being rejected. That’s not my main reason, but I can’t say that the ONLY reason I’ve EVER done it is because my loins are aflame.

UptwnGrl05
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 03:22 pm: [report]

I love that the book seems to focus on the depressing aspects of why women have sex…what happened to having sex because sex is fun and you want to?! I love that everyone on here flat out says it’s because they’re horny or want it, or (@ootie) because of cute undies!! I’ve been there, we all have. Although, I would really like to meet the guys that give out presents that easily. I’m lucky if my boyfriend will get me a glass of water after!!

I Go To 11
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 03:26 pm: [report]

Sorry, not buying the whole “take out the trash” excuse. Lame! It’s one of the sorriest reasons I’ve ever heard for having sex. “If you take out the nasty garbage, we can do the nasty afterwards.” WTH?

I’m more inclined to side with quote #4 in the post. Although, sometimes, truth be told, I’d rather have chocolate than sex. Both are satisfying in their own ways. Mmm, I want some chocolate now…maybe some sex after my fiance gets home…dangit, now you’ve got my mind going!

majicksand
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 03:32 pm: [report]

I’ve had sex for any number of stupid reasons in the past—usually related in some way to either his wants or my insecurities.  Now?  I just want my husband all the time.  Tired? Sick? Just finished having amazing sex 5 minutes ago?  Doesn’t matter; I’m ready.  Insane multiple orgasms.  That’s all I’m saying.

Humble Bee
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 03:46 pm: [report]

I do it for love baby!
buuut I haven’t found any…. :(
boy do I miss having sex though…
my friends all freak out and get all excited when I tell them I haven’t had sex in almost a year. They automatically jump out of their seat and start trying to hook me up with their cousins and co-workers so that I could get laid. I’m fine though. I want to find the right person to have sex with and when I do, we’ll do it all the time.

CaleeKay
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 03:48 pm: [report]

@brandyalexander - um, i dont know where you live, but you must be somewhere sheltered. only 5% of men? really? girl you need to get out or something.

i have sex for two reasons.

1. because i want it.
2. because he wants it.

and i enjoy it everytime.

obviously there are women with other reasons, but i think they should interview many OTHER women, because there really are a ton of women who flat out -enjoy it.

if i were them, i would take a frisky poll, because it sure seems like we are all for it ;]

effing hickster
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 04:11 pm: [report]

@Humble Bee: I sure wish friends would help out guys who have that problem the way they wanted to for you.

But then again, being a guy, I’m expected to fix things myself.

mayorbubbles
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 04:54 pm: [report]

@ thegr8brownie

Is your avatar Milo Ventimiglia?

staramour
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 04:57 pm: [report]

@CayleeKay - love your two reasons! 

I wonder who these 1000 women are.  I realize that’s a large #, but maybe they didn’t get a wide variety in that 1000… gosh I hope so, because I feel like such an outlier!

bettyboo
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 04:58 pm: [report]

my first thought was, the women who answered this are obviously in cr@p relationships..  In the bad old days with my ex doing it to shut him up so I could go to sleep wasn’t unknown..  fortunately I’m now with a guy I love dearly and lust after more or less constantly so it tends to be ‘because we’re in the same room..’  ;0)

develange
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 05:11 pm: [report]

I guess I just have low standards, because I can find something at least “somewhat sexually attractive” in most men.  Or I’m just really horny.

But yeah, there are men who I have absolutely no desire to bang.

I think (or like to think) most men have standards, and would not just #&@$% anything with a vagina. There are going to plenty of women they don’t find even “somewhat sexually attractive.” I hope.

Knitter79
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 05:37 pm: [report]

I can see how some couples could get to the point where sex isn’t just about pleasure anymore.  After the first few years with my ex there were definitely nights that we had sex because I could get to sleep faster if I just had sex with him instead of having to put up with him pestering me for sex (and then him being moody the next day).  I guess that falls under the ‘keep the peace’ category.

pagankinktress
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 06:24 pm: [report]

Hmmm….

I’d like to know the particulars about the women they surveyed for this book.  Were they single? Married? In long term relationships?  My money is on the married/long term relationship demographic—it sounds to me like they focused on women who’ve been with a partner for a while and who no longer see sex as a way to express oneself.  Which quite honestly, is sad…but I know a lot of married couples who claim sex kinda goes downhill after a while.  It suddenly becomes obligatory and a tool to manipulate with. 

What *should* be studied is why that becomes a trend in long term/married relationships in the first place.  I mean, what does *that* imply about women and men’s attitudes toward sex?  That’d be more interesting to research…and probably even more useful.

DancingGeek
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 06:35 pm: [report]

UM- Because it’s freaking awesome???!!!!!

tishfish44
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 07:05 pm: [report]

Wait… when do I NOT want to have sex?  Sorry to be “that” girl, but seriously.  It’s never BAD, as in, so bad I wish I wasn’t doing it.  Plus, it’s a good extra workout or two or three during the day.  Seriously.  I have never started having sex only to eventually change my mind and end it mid-coitus.  You know?  It’s just a lot of FUN!

theoldman
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 07:07 pm: [report]

@pagankinktress Only if they got people who are fuddy duddies. @ootie how about something like the avatar?  1905 Italian silk embroidered stockings; got those for my girl.  Just because we get older doesn’t mean we lose our lust for life.

tishfish44
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 07:10 pm: [report]

@pagankinktress I’ve also been with my husband for eight years now and we do it regularly and as often as possible and for no apparent reason.  We have recently snuck out of the house to do it in our car during our own house party.  I do not have sex with my hubby to manipulate him into anything- and that would be very sad if I did.

That said…  I think you’re right that *some* women use sex as a tool for manipulation.  Maybe *some* women’s husbands are finding it elsewhere in response.  I don’t know.  Maybe these same women would enjoy sex more themselves if they didn’t see it as a chore in order to get another chore accomplished?

Everyone who love someone, get on it tonight! 

effing hickster
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 08:29 pm: [report]

Generally, I have sex because she lets me.

lawyrgrl
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 08:39 pm: [report]

1.  Because batteries are expensive.
2.  To amuse my dogs.  (Love the expressions on their faces.  “They’re doing it wrong!  Oh, wait, now they have it right.  Nope, back to doing it wrong…”)
3.  Because my sheets are too damned clean.
4.  To avoid cleaning the oven.
5.  So that the hair on the back of my head gets that sexy knotted frizzy look that is all the rage this season.
6.  Because I like it when the neighbors call the police about the strange noises coming from my house.
7.  Because those sofa cushions aren’t going to stain themselves!

pagankinktress
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 08:57 pm: [report]

@effing hickster: Hahaha…ok, that made me chuckle!

@tishfish44: I genuinely think that is fantastic that you and your hubby continue to enjoy each other and *desire* one another.  Good for you! What do you think the secret is to maintaining that level of desire and hotness in a long term relationship?  What has worked for you and your mate?

I should also clarify; I don’t think that *all* long term couples experience a shift in their sexual relationships.  On some level, in our society, its almost expected…but yet, it is not the case for everyone.

Revolutionary Girl
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 09:02 pm: [report]

I have sex because its the most beautiful and wonderful feeling in the world to smile at my partner after we both got off and cuddle.

F*ck those 1000 women. Geeze!

KeyLimePie
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 09:37 pm: [report]

I agree, I am only attracted to a tiny percentage of men.

But when I finally find one I’m attracted to, I can’t get enough sex with him.

Angelamayn
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 09:40 pm: [report]

I already knew I was missing out, but I know I’m not the only girl who has never had the pleasure of actually experiencing any spine-tingling sensations or “explosions” from having sex! ha. I still want sex, but it does nothing for me. When I was younger I had sex with semi-attractive guys just to see…
“will I have an orgasm THIS time??” Nope. Nothing.

So, I’d be one of those chicks saying that I’ll have sex to please my partner for sure. I’ll have sex if I’m bored and yeah, I’ll have sex if it gets the trash taken out too.

Red_Lady
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 09:42 pm: [report]

Sex is a great cure for headaches!  I had a killer one a few nights ago, and after some good lovin’ I was feeling MUCH better. 
But generally, I have sex because I’m horny, or because my bf is.

LauraRB
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 10:48 pm: [report]

I definitely agree with the percentages… when I first meet a man, until I know if he’s cool/intelligent/good, all I can really say about him is “he’s not deformed.”  I rarely think a man is hot at first sight… even with celebrities, you have an idea about their personality… even if it’s wayyyy off!  But I think most men would be perfectly happy to never know the personality of a women and would bang her anyway, muffin-tops and all!  And I have had sex for many reasons… none of which involve domestic chores.  But certainly: because I was horny, because he was horny and he wouldn’t let me go to sleep until he got some, because it would be too awkward to say no at that point, because I wanted the guy to know I cared even if I wasn’t feeling horny at that time, and many other less noble reasons.  The thing is, even though we try to elevate sex to this semi-holy act, it ain’t!!  Our closest (and most peaceful/happy) genetic relatives, the bonobos, are matriarchal and use sex for everything!  They do it (in many more ways and with damn near everyone in their troop than any other species) to get food, to show affection, to say sorry, ‘cause they’re bored, etc, etc etc.  Basically, sex for them is the biggest and most versatile band-aid!

onewriter
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 11:45 pm: [report]

@bettyboo I could have written your comment…

I have a man I crave.  Just being in the room with him,  thinking of him, smelling his scent when I hug him.  I don’t think he cares for sex as often as I want it, but it could also be that I won’t get off either.  (long boring story you don’t need or want to hear)  So, long story short.  I do it to make him feel good.  I do it because I love him very much.  I do it because I crave him.  And I do it because eventually, I may feel comfortable finishing for him.  (In the meantime, I try and make sure he is satisfied)

CaleeKay
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 12:17 am: [report]

I really like that word-crave. I crave my man. That is a great description word! You’ve inspired me to use that on him.

margschrader
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 01:31 am: [report]

I have sex because my boyfriend literally makes me hot.  When I think about him, my body gets warmer.  I get wet putting my make-up on, drying my hair, driving to see him, being in the same place clothed, watching him shave.

I have sex because I like the way it feels when he climaxes and the way that makes me feel.

I have sex because I am in love.

skywalk
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 05:30 am: [report]

@Angelamayn: it isn’t as easy for every women to have an O, but there are likely a few things going on for you not to have experienced one at all.
1.  You’re might not be comfortable with yourself so if you’re not comfortable with you how can you be comfortable (relaxed) with someone else is touching you, so You may not be relaxing and when I’m not relaxed I can’t have an O either.  So you have to comfortable yourself and there are a few ways to work that out.
2.  You haven’t been with the right man, but this is hard to tell unless you get over step number 1 because if your pushing him away because you don’t feel comfortable than there is little he can do.
3.  So if you follow 1 & 2, by getting comfortable and knowledgeable about yourself, you find a great guy, who is comfortable and knowledgeable (or willing to learn) at this point you need to experiment, experiment, experiment, I know sometimes something will work for me one night and not the next but experiments is all part of the fun.
4.  There could be medical or other reasons you are having trouble but I would go the tried and true route first.

onewriter
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 05:41 am: [report]

@margshrader YES YES YES!!!  I soooo understand.  And I too love it when he finishes, because I feel that really usually waaayyy enjoyed himself.  Sometimes it can be so strong.  I love it.  Granted, it’s over after that, but he is a big snuggler and NEVER goes to sleep after that without cuddling up with me.

*sam*
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 05:51 am: [report]

I have sex because I have the sex drive of a rabbit. 2, 3 times a night is the norm during the week, and when we’re home alone on the weekends it increases slightly. We have sex because we can’t seem to get enough of one another and every orgasm we have only makes us crave another. In short, we’re addicted to each other.

That being said, I have (on rare occasions, like when I’m extremely depressed or *really* stressed out & upset) had sex to please him. Also, when I was younger (OK, like a few years ago, whatever) I had sex bc I was lonely and had absolutely no self-esteem left over from my previous relationship. I’ve also done it out of pity (once). However, all of these times are in the VAST minority of my sexual escapades.

canadiancutie
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 06:06 am: [report]

Well, I agree and disagree with the main points. I only “crave” sex with a particular man if I’m very attracted to the man, that’s true. But if said man IS attractive in my eyes, then I will crave it all the time for a myriad of reasons, none of which are “just to make him happy,” or I wouldn’t initiate so damn much of the time.

hereshestands
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 06:08 am: [report]

I have sex cause I loove my bf and cause I get horny. Pretty simple. Oh and who doesn’t love sex!

canadiancutie
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 06:11 am: [report]

Perhaps my high sex drive all boils down to the fact that I only date taller guys with gorgeous smiles, fit bodies, and blonde hair. Maybe if I wasn’t so insistent on dating guys I’m extremely attracted to, I would be on-side with the 1000 women in this survey.

stiffinp
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 06:19 am: [report]

Regarding a much earlier comment. NO, some men will not hump anything!

catscratchfever
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 08:15 am: [report]

It’s cool if I sometimes have sex to cure a headache, though, right?  Because I get some monster headaches, and sex works. 

@ Queen Frostine - I also want to know who is getting/giving presents in exchange for sex.  I could be having sex AND getting presents?!

tishfish44
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 08:33 am: [report]

@pagankinktress Good question.    I can think of three things, two that work for everyone and one that doesn’t.
1 - taking care of ourselves.  We both work out and desire to be attractive to each other. Doesn’t hurt. 

2- spontaneity (duh).  Bored?  Jump him!  Doesn’t matter where you are.  Again, even if I think I’m not in the mood, once we get going, I’m totally in it, thinking “WHY didn’t I think I was in the mood???”

3 - We have very different work schedules (he works overnights Wed-Sat) and I work days Mon-Thurs.  We see less of each other than most couples, so it’s hard to get too “routine” or aggravate/bore each other.

Sorry for too much information. 

brandyalexander
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 08:50 am: [report]

@CayleeKay: Nope, I live in a little college town on the East Coast and spend most of my weekends in Philly or New York.  I just have very specific standards… current boy is a 6’1” Indian model with a chiseled jawline, huge, dark eyes, and amazing body… omg… here I go again… mmm…
Sorry, but the majority of men are just “meh,” to me, or worse, gross.  It sounds strange, but although I consider myself straight, or mostly straight , I find more women to be physically attractive, and I think in general women take more time taking care of their hair, makeup, clothes, bodies.  Of course attraction can grow as you get to know someone, but for me, the percentage of men for whom I feel immediate physical attraction is probably about 5%, maybe less.

majicksand
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 10:38 am: [report]

@brandy: I agree except my “qualifications” are a little different.  Accepted “super-hot” qualities are a no-brainer, but I always find myself attracted to guys with some indefinable spark, some of whom would never be regarded as “super-hot” by most women.  I’m not sure what it is because they all look different.  Dark hair, light hair, 6’2”, 5’9”, doesn’t seem to make a difference.  I’d say personality, but I see it from across the room.  They are always artistic in some fashion (painters, musicians, etc.), but I don’t know how one “sees” that.  Maybe it’s how they carry themselves?  I dunno.

The point of my ramble is that it doesn’t happen often.  I’ve dated (and/or slept with) guys in the past because they were fabulous eye-candy or became attracive due to personality, but the ones who got me hot instantly were few and far between.

Oh, and I want to know about this present thing too.  I guess I technically do get presents if you count the fact that my husband let’s me buy whatever I want, but I’m not sure that’s the same thing.  How do I get in on this present thing?  I like presents!

PotteryGirl
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 11:14 am: [report]

One reason - it’s awesome.  But I have to say, if the presents are good like a pair of Kate Spade shoes or maybe a Louiv V. purse - I could totally rethink my stance on only having sex because I want to and really, really, really enjoy it.  LOL!

And if my current place of employement represents any kind of demographic, there are a lot of very unnattractive people out there!  I think men have lower standards than women do.

brandyalexander
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 11:34 am: [report]

@majick: Yeah, they’ve all been a little different, too.  Most of them I would say I felt an instant attraction to, though with two, it was more of a friendship that slowly caught on fire.  But as for instant attraction, like just people watching in the city, I stick by my initial reaction… its definitly less than 5%. Those are the guys that I think, looks, check, now if he can only have a decent and likable personality, plus a mutual attraction, I will be one happy girl.  These fellows are mercifully few and far between, otherwise I’d never get out of bed…

_jsw_
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 01:27 pm: [report]

I’m guessing that this question isn’t asked on many men’s sites. It’d be somewhat akin to asking “Why do you eat when you’re hungry?”

Once I resume having sex, I’ll remember the reasons why I did. I think it had something to do with it feeling good and making me feel closer to my partner, although maybe it was just for the exercise.

majicksand
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 01:34 pm: [report]

@jsw: Come on, jsw.  You can’t fool us.  It’s all about dominance and control with you. You’re “creepy” and violent remember?  Just ask luvtara!

_jsw_
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 01:40 pm: [report]

@majicksand: Shhhhh!!!

I can’t lure unsuspecting women into my trap if you tell them about it!

Squidtermz
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 02:46 pm: [report]

@riley - I usually try to finish as fast as I can and ask for half my money back.

Claireific
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 02:48 pm: [report]

Aww! Dr. Buss was my undergraduate advisor! He’s awesome. But if it helps, this study was *probably* done on college-aged females. He’s a psychology professor at The University of Texas at Austin. And I’ll agree with some of the detractors here; if you did a study that hinged on what amounts to sexual satisfaction in women (“I have sex for orgasms/connection” v. “I have sex to get my boyfriend to leave me alone so I can get some sleep”) it makes sense for there to be this result in women aged 18-24, who aren’t yet at their expected sexual peak.

majicksand
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 03:02 pm: [report]

@claireific:  I don’t know about that.  I’m insatiable at 36, but I remember my late teens and early twenties as being sex-o-rama central.  3 or 4 times a day for months at a time.  Because I wanted it.  I had a lot more time and a lot less responsibility back then.  I also had more energy and no worries that the kids might interrupt while trying to break down my bedroom door because they need a glass of water.

I think these women have bigger issues than not being at their sexual peak.  I also think that “so he’ll take out the trash” generates more conversation than “because I like sex”, therefore, sells more.

_jsw_
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 03:06 pm: [report]

@majicksand: Once I perfect cloning, may I have, oh, a hair sample from you?

majicksand
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 03:14 pm: [report]

@jsw: Only if you promise that you will also be cloning yourself and my mini-me will be for your “son”.  Otherwise you’d be the “creepy old guy” banging the hot co-ed by the time she was any use to you.  My mini-me would not be into that.  Ewww!

_jsw_
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 03:16 pm: [report]

@majicksand: I’d accelerate the age. She’d come out closer to my age. Once I can magically clone people, I’m sure I’ll be able to magically age them as well.

lawyrgrl
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 03:37 pm: [report]

Can we get back to the presents issue?  Has this been resolved?  Because I would REALLY like to know how to get my freak on and then get presents!  Kind of like my birthday and the 4th of July wrapped up in one spakly package….

lawyrgrl
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 03:38 pm: [report]

Ugh!  SpaRkly - not spakly!  Attempt at being funny - FAIL

majicksand
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 03:48 pm: [report]

@jsw: Boy, wouldn’t that make it weird for you two to go out to dinner with my husband and me!?  I mean, seriously, I’d have to check in to make sure you were treating her right.  Oh, and I reserve the right to name her too.  I’ve got five pages of girl names I’ve never gotten to use, and she would be “me”, so it seems only fair.

writergirl
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 03:59 pm: [report]

@lawyrgrl—to combine sex and presents you give lots of blow jobs.

writergirl
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 04:00 pm: [report]

and they are generally sparkly presents, too!

effing hickster
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 04:16 pm: [report]

@writergirl: Don’t you mean spackly?

spark
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 05:29 pm: [report]

because i LOVE LOVE LOVE it!

condomelite1
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 09:21 pm: [report]

Because it gives me something to do.

Shiny Objects
wrote on September 11 2009 @ 10:26 pm: [report]

A. cause the cable went out
2. he’s snoring & I can’t sleep anyway
Tres. Margaritas!
IV. Cause I look & feel amazing in these thigh-highs.

tangerine-eve
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 12:28 am: [report]

I think this should be the simplest answer ever. I have sex because it makes me happy in some way. Most of the time, it makes me physically happy. The other like 5% of the time, it makes my partner happy, which in turn still makes me happy. I guess I’m still the naive and sexually-selfish 19 year old, but still, I’m hoping (wishfully) that I can always keep it this simple.

1. I like sex.
2. Even if I don’t get complete pleasure out of it, I enjoy seeing my boyfriend in ecstasy.

And that;s enough for me.

majicksand
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 09:42 am: [report]

@shiny objects: I love your list.  My favorite part amy have been A,2,tres,IV

Wow, I just realized that we kinda missed a big one.  There was one jesting comment, but I don’t think it counts.  Sometimes (like nearly every day this month) I have sex to get pregnant.  Duh?

GirlvWorld
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 10:22 am: [report]

Wow… People will take our your trash and give you presents if you have sex with them??  Clearly, I am not utilizing all of my potential.

http://www.blog.#&@$%.com

MSK
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 03:56 pm: [report]

I LOVE sex. I love it because it feels amazing, because I like feeling sexy in bed, and because I love my husband. There are many more reasons, but these are the top three that come to mind.

magenta generation
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 08:11 pm: [report]

I have had sex because I wanted the guy to love me; which I don’t think works- they can love you more but to get/be loved by a guy um, no.  That was then…celibacy is now. Deciding to wait for Mr.Right instead of Mr.Right now. 

Question. Does masturbation (um, sex for one) count or are we only talking about inter(outer)course? LOL.

CaleeKay
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 10:00 pm: [report]

is it just me, or has this articles comments gone on far too long…

onewriter
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 10:30 pm: [report]

it’s not just you…but when I got the email from this link, I thought it was for another one I’m following.  I must say, it’s getting old watching people bash other people on a topic that was not even the original.  ugh…lame lame lame.  Get a grip people!  You know?  there must be a million things to talk about, why keep yapping on the same one-and it wasn’t even the subject of the article originally.  I almost feel like I need to start that again.  lol I wanted more info, not arguments about something else entirely

_jsw_
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 10:50 pm: [report]

Did the email alert system mix up links?

I’m not seeing any arguments or bashing here.

onewriter
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 11:27 pm: [report]

not on this one love, on the “how to thrill an uncircumsized male” one…it’s not even that now.  it’s been hijacked into which is better cut or not…grrrr

*sam*
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 09:11 am: [report]

@gulbadan: PLEASE quit littering the comment threads with irrelevant info and a link to your private blog. If you don’t have anything ON TOPIC to contribute, do us ALL a favor and shut up!!

Stargazer401
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 10:39 am: [report]

Unless the sample group was a random sample, these women were not representative of the female population as a whole.  Gosh, I’m tired of books, movies, etc that paint women as asexual, nagging shrews.

CheezeDoodles
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 07:22 pm: [report]

@Stargazer:  well put.  <golf clap here>

Why do I have sex?  If I had to whittle it down to a top 5, they are:

1. because I want to / he wants to
2. because I just caught a whiff of the boyfriend’s cologne and the way it mixes with his skin chemistry—HUMMINA, HUMMINA
3. because I’m horny and don’t feel like flying solo
4. because I watched something on RedTube that has me going
5. because I’m tired of watching him flip channels incessantly!  The ‘ol “Deflect-and-Redirect” strategy.  (LOL)

babylaceface
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 01:27 am: [report]

my reasons are
1. because i love him
2. because im horny almost constanly
3. because it feels like every great thing in the world combined plus some
4. because even those moments where im not horny he knows how to turn me on
5. because no one has ever loved me as much as him and the closeness we share is unlike anything else i have ever experienced
6. to watch the faces and listen to the noises he makes while im pleasing him. love it.

ashleye
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 06:15 am: [report]

This book sounds a little ridiculous to me…I have sex because I love to feel my boyfriend. Sex is amazing and it makes him and I adore each other that much more. You can have release when you have sex. It’s the greatest thing in the world and I am rather insatiable when it comes to sex.

ladybutterfly
wrote on September 15 2009 @ 12:21 pm: [report]

so i just read this article and i read all the comments, and i liked the fact that people posted because we are sticking up for the proud sexually active women who just are like me and think that having sex is great because it is awesome, i have both married and unmarried friends that love sex and range in age and race and all that, but i have a few that use sex as a tool to get something out of it, i think there is probably a percentage of women who are in bad relationships, and use sex as a weapon towards the guy to get him to stay to get him to do what they want, withholding sex and giving sex for anything but the enjoyment and fun and intimacy of two people is just wrong.. and i think both men and women who are in a situation like that need to evaluate their relationship and get help. it is a insane idea that some women get presents for having sex…that is kinda wrong u would even like that… if your not a hooker u shouldnt get anything for putting out but enjoyment….though we all love presents….i think the times have changed more women like sex like having it like talking about it being open, we like to feel hot and wanted and sexually aroused and we are proud to let it show. ive known plenty of men who are scared off by that, i dont think men just have sex with anyone who has a vagina…......i also think it is sad that women have to have sex to keep their man happy and because he wants it so i give it to him, or because i dont want to fight him…so fight make up sex is way better then just spreading ur legs,,i think it is cool that women are speaking out about how things are really because people read garbage books like that and because it has experts or drs saying crap like that they believe it…so that is just my opinions

loves sex!

LousyReputation
wrote on September 16 2009 @ 10:43 am: [report]

I have sex because my boyfriend is an amazing lover… And who wouldn’t want to have great sex all the time!

Especially when he uses such great lines as “Take me to bed or lose me forever,” because he knows that top Gun is my favourtie movie of all time!

Shannon87
wrote on September 16 2009 @ 09:36 pm: [report]

Yes, you should have sex because he wants to, but it should be that you want to make him happy and that you are enjoying it as well. If you’re not enjoying it then I think it may be because you are not doing something quite right. And if you’re having sex just to steer clear of a petty argument, then I say have the argument. 9 times out of 10 the sex after the fight is better anyway. And is it really an astounding 84% of women that feel this way? I almost feel sad that these women seem to be missing out on what is one of the greatest pleasures in life. There has to be more than 16% of women that enjoy this amazing act as much, if not even more, than I do.

effing hickster
wrote on September 17 2009 @ 07:31 am: [report]

@majicksand: That sex to get pregnant comment reminds me of that great scene in the movie Election.

Diane McAllister: You gonna do it? Come on. Fill me up! Come on! Fill me up! Yeah! Good job!

LMAO!

bigred
wrote on September 17 2009 @ 03:20 pm: [report]

because it feels good…. http://mpreviews.com

majicksand
wrote on September 17 2009 @ 03:28 pm: [report]

This is the third time in less than a minute I’ve seen the above link. (checking email)  Ugh!  If you are only commenting in order to plug your own site, GO AWAY!  It’s annoying to those of us who are commenting because we feel we have something relevant to say.

_jsw_
wrote on September 17 2009 @ 03:32 pm: [report]

@majicksand: Reported.

majicksand
wrote on September 17 2009 @ 03:35 pm: [report]

@jsw: Oh, right.  Uhh, I didn’t think of that.   Where would I be without you?  You’re my techie hero!

Bomb w/ the best hair
wrote on September 17 2009 @ 07:23 pm: [report]

I have sex because once you have had a G-spot orgasam, you never want to stop having sex!! I have a huge sexual appitite, like a man would, so i want it alllll the time!! Mmmmmmm ;0

ChocoBoo
wrote on September 22 2009 @ 07:21 am: [report]

Let’s see, I have sex with my man (and myself) because:
1. it feels soo good
2. orgasms make me happy and prevent me from killing my clients
3. sweating and panting counts as a work-out
4. I love that mushy “goo goo, ga ga” feeling I get after we’re done

So umm, no I don’t get down just to cure a headache, maybe to cure a clit-ache though..