When Women Bully, We Hurt Each Other
Posted by: Catherine Strawn
Filed in:
news
10:30AM, Monday May 11th 2009
A survey by the Workplace Bullying Institute found that most bullies are men—but 40 percent are women. While male bullies attack men and women, female bullies tend to go after their own kind, targeting other women more than 70 percent of the time.
My guess is that some women who want to feel powerful feel the need to dominate others, and lording over other women can be easier than commanding men. With the economy the way it is, people are trying to get ahead, and some are taking not-so-nice measures to get there. In case you’re not sure whether someone is bullying you, tactics can include being glared at in a hostile manner, being given the silent treatment, and having others fail to deny false rumors about you. Sounds like pretty catty behavior, doesn’t it?
One reason researchers believe women resort to bullying is because many women don’t know how to lead any other way, so they attack and embarrass one another. Sadly, even when women resort to these tactics, they don’t get ahead. Gender stereotyping research suggests that no matter how women lead, they are perceived as “never just right,” and sadly women must work twice as hard as men to achieve the same recognition and to prove they can lead.
How do men bully? How do women bully? Do men and women perceive the same actions as bullying? [NY Times]
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EarthGoddess
wrote on May 11 2009 @ 11:01 am: [report]
No surprise here. I’ve always thought that men are more direct and less subtle (for sure) than women are. Women are usually more sneaky and will find more creative ways to manipulate the situation to suit their needs. So, the female bully will sometimes not be perceived as one by the outside observer. This combined with the fact that more men than women (even in executive positions) have lost their jobs in the recession has more and more women competing for the Alpha Female position in their workplace. It’s kind of the opposite of the Good Old Boys attitude where they protect their own. Instead we’ve been programmed to be against each other and the “Mean Girls” high school attitude returns. It’s sad really.
Humble Bee
wrote on May 11 2009 @ 11:10 am: [report]
TOOOTALLY. My friend doens’t even realize she’s getting bullied at work. These women pretend to be her friend, them make fun of her constantly, peer pressure her to do things so that eventually she can get in trouble. YET my friend says, “oh no, its all in good fun” She wants to fit in with them, and they kind of pressure her to gossip with them. She doesn’t want to stay quiet because then they’ll call her a goody too shoes. I would rather just smile, stay quiet and do my work.
I feel like men bully a different way, they are more clear about it. They will literally tease you and laugh in your face then say. “Oh i’m only kidding, you know your good enough”. PPFFFTT.. damn right I do. I don’t mind their sarcastic comments anymore. I just smile, cause’ in my head i’m thinking, thanks for the motivation biotch.
CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on May 11 2009 @ 11:19 am: [report]
The fairer sex indeed.
Ahh wordplay on a Monday, cathartic.
Jessica
wrote on May 11 2009 @ 04:41 pm: [report]
I’ve actually never been bullied by women in the workplace, only by men.
Fla_girl
wrote on May 11 2009 @ 04:58 pm: [report]
All I have to say is I go to work to do my job, if I make a few friends along the way all the better. But I try not to get myself caught up in all the BS drama!