Flowchart: What To Do When You Get Stood Up
Posted by: Simcha Whitehill
Filed in:
relationships
8:30AM, Friday July 31st 2009
I just got stood up. It’s sad, but true. Worst of all, it was finally the sex date. Double burn. I don’t know why this last dude left me waiting. My guess is he was either called back into spy service by the FBI or mauled by a tiger. Fingers crossed it was the latter. Just kidding. Sort of. But couldn’t he at least have had the balls to dump me, instead of just leaving me hanging? Sigh.
Unfortunately, for some reason, I get stood up a lot. I’m kind of a pro at it by now. It all started back in high school when my date ditched me the night of my senior prom. And a couple years ago, I spent a Valentine’s Day alone on my sofa in a new red dress crying to Ben & Jerry. (Although that did inspire me to make this music mix, “You Can’t F*#& The Hole In My Heart.”) So, as you can see, I’m an expert with what you should do with the night you had saved for a man who doesn’t show up to share it. Here are some options and outcomes in a handy-dandy flowchart. (CLICK HERE to see it on a larger scale.) Notice, I don’t recommend bitching him out. I’m classy like that. And you obvi have better things to do too, girl!
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shannac02
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 07:51 am: [report]
:( Getting stood up is THE WORST THING EVER! I’m sorry, you’re a beautiful girl, you deserve better. P.S.: Love the flow chart!
kw1223
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 08:33 am: [report]
Awww, I’m sorry. That sucks.
CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 09:15 am: [report]
Everything should end with masturbation.
raqueleza
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 09:19 am: [report]
Sorry Simcha : ( Flaky dudes are so hard to spot, too. At least this happened before you let him get at your candies, right?
Okay Tea
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 10:01 am: [report]
I’m a big fan of the Golden Girls thread on this flow chart.
Well done.
mokti
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 10:01 am: [report]
Hmm… I think there should be some loop redundancy or cross charting in there somewhere.
Humble Bee
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 12:43 pm: [report]
haha. I love the masterbating part. That made me laugh so hard. I’d probabaly follow that line, if stood up. Yeah, don’t sweat it, like you said, your a pro, you can shake it off, and be like ah who cares, my next bitch please..
Dmun
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 02:17 pm: [report]
What on earth is a sex date?
If it is what I think it is (“I’m going to wait until such and such time, on this particular date, to sleep with him”) I would’ve stood you up too.
Well, no, I probably would’ve just stopped calling—why make a date and back out, just don’t make the date.
majicksand
wrote on August 1 2009 @ 11:15 am: [report]
You should look up my friend Chuck. He has the same sorts of problems and I can’t figure out why. Good looking, amazing personality, all around great guy. I told him he’s obviously going for the wrong type of women.
http://www.myspace.com/chuckchuckphoto63