Love In The Stratosphere: Learn How To Join The Mile-High Club

It would be hard to find a more fitting pair than of sex and travel. Here, one adventurer, who has kissed an uncounted number of men who don’t share her zip code, shares her experience combining the two through more than 30 countries.

Long flights aren’t just for, well, flying. While you’re thousands of feet above ground, why not join a certain club? You know exactly what I mean. While I’m not an expert on helping you find that handsome, adventurous someone for your tryst, I can definitely help with the logistics, especially now that planes are feeling more like sardine cans lately (thank you fuel prices). And joining the MHC is really the best way to end any vacation.

Two people walking together towards one back bathroom looks shady. Make sure that a minute or so has elapsed before you walk down the airplane aisle.

Don’t Skip The Foreplay
Take some time to enjoy the friendly skies while you’re in your seats, because once you’re in the bathroom, there’s no time to waste (unless you want flight attendants knocking at the door).

Timing Really Is Everything
On long-haul flights, airlines often dim the lights after a meal to give passengers the chance to sleep. Take this as your cue to start preparations. Since fellow flyers will be dozing off, you’ll get fewer knowing stares when you head back to your seat.

Space It Out
Two people walking together towards one back bathroom looks shady. Make sure that a minute or so has elapsed before you walk down the airplane aisle. In the meantime, read a book or magazine to help you appear less anxious to any surrounding seatmates.

Don’t Get Locked Out
Since locking the door will automatically alert the flight crew that a passenger is in the restroom, it’s best to keep the door unlocked until the next person walks in. That way, it looks like the bathroom was vacant and entered only by the second person.

Prepare To Be Uncomfortable
Bathroom stalls on an airplane really are as cramped as they look, but it’s not like the backseat of your dumpy high school car was any better. With some maneuvering, it can be done.

Relax
As much fun as movies or books make joining the mile-high club out to be, they’re not entirely truthful, as there are often complications (ahem) involved. Just chill and try to get carried away in the moment. Of course, a glass of wine (free on most international flights) will help with this.

Share And Repeat
Part of the fun of having sex on the plane in a tiny, tiny bathroom is that you get to tell your friends. Just don’t make the mistake I did and tell your future boyfriend.