Tips From A Recessionista: 15 Tips For Throwing A Budget Wedding
Posted by: Wendy Atterberry
Filed in:
relationships
9:00AM, Wednesday April 15th 2009
Since I started planning a wedding in one of the most expensive cities in the world (New York City) during the worst economic climate since the Great Depression, I’ve picked up a few tips on cutting costs and staying sane without compromising too much on what I want. If you’re willing to be flexible and open to nontraditional ideas, you can have the “perfect” wedding, whatever your budget may be. After the jump, 15 tips for throwing a budget wedding.
1. Quit “Shoulding” All Over Yourself
The biggest cost-cutting tactic in planning a wedding is focusing on what you want, not what you think you should do, have, or wear. Just because every bridal magazine and your Great Aunt Sally say you have to have a $1,200 veil, doesn’t mean you do! In fact, you don’t have to have a veil at all. You don’t have to have Save the Date cards, a three-tiered cake, or a poofy white gown if you don’t want them. These aren’t the things that make a wedding a wedding. YOU, and your betrothed, saying your vows, expressing your love, and making a commitment to each other is what makes a wedding a wedding. Everything else is icing on the cake (or pie, if that’s what you prefer).
2. Choose A Free Or Cheap Location
Most banquet halls are ridiculously expensive. Before you drop a deposit that could pay for a home, think about places you could say your vows that won’t put you in debt. Backyards, parks, restaurants, your best friend’s parents’ enormous house, even a community rec room can be wonderfully intimate spots for a wedding. After researching lots of places, my fiancé and I settled on a small garden in Central Park. It costs a fraction of what some of the raw spaces and reception halls in the city would cost, and it comes with its own flowers! Afterwards, we’re having our reception at a restaurant, where we’re paying about a quarter what a typical caterer would charge per person. Choosing a restaurant for a reception is a fantastic way to keep costs down, particularly if you find one that doesn’t charge a booking fee.
3. Avoid Wedding Rush Hour
Saturday night is the rush hour of weddings, so restaurants and wedding halls will cost more on that night than, say, on a Friday afternoon. For religious reasons, my fiancé and I couldn’t have a wedding on a Saturday, and since we wanted to celebrate with our friends into the night, we decided a Sunday wouldn’t work either. So we’re going with a Friday morning ceremony, followed by a lunch reception and a party at our apartment later that night, and we’re saving hundreds of dollars in the process. Also, keep in mind that spring and summer are the peak wedding seasons. Consider off-peak months to save even more bucks on your wedding.
4. Have A Potluck
Wanna really save a bundle on food? Invite everyone to bring a dish in lieu of a gift. You’ll have a great variety of eats, and you won’t be stuck returning a bunch of toasters you don’t need.
5. Keep The Wedding Small
Consider making the wedding family-only or only inviting immediate family and close friends. Resist the urge to invite everyone’s plus-one, unless their plus-one is someone you actually know well. Think about inviting one group of people to the reception — often the most expensive part of a wedding — and having a BYO party at your apartment for a more inclusive group of people. Who says you have to buy dinner for everyone you want to celebrate your special day with?
6. Use Your Friends And Family
Do you have friends who are talented with a sewing machine, know their way around a camera, play the fiddle like a pro, or have baking skills that put Martha Stewart to shame? Great! Ask them for assistance in making a dress, taking pictures, providing music for the ceremony, and making your wedding cake. Always offer to pay, but don’t be surprised if they offer their services at a big discount or even for free as a wedding gift. Be careful, though: If your wedding — and friendship — would be ruined if any of those aspects don’t turn out perfectly, go ahead and splurge on a pro.
7. Use Family Heirlooms
If there are engagement rings or wedding bands sitting in a drawer or safety deposit box somewhere, get them out and consider giving them life again. I’m using my great-grandmother’s engagement ring from 1928 as my own, and I couldn’t be happier with it. The money that would have gone to a brand new ring is going to help fund our honeymoon. If there’s a wedding gown, veil, handbag, engagement ring, wedding band — anything! — in the family you like well enough to use for yourself, do. Not only can it save you a ton of money, it’s a special gesture to boot.
8. Take Advantage of Students
For every service you need, there’s a student willing to provide it for a nominal fee in exchange for experience. If you live in a big city like New York, for example, you’ve got students from some of the most renowned schools and programs in the world at your fingertips. My fiancé and I plan to hire Julliard students to play music at our ceremony, but even if you don’t live in a big city, you’ll find plenty of talented apprentices eager for experience. Scour Craigslist and contact schools for names, but be sure to ask for samples before you commit. The last thing you want is a shoddy makeup job or a crappy cake on your big day because you failed to sample the goods first.
JUST SKIP IT
9. Skip the DJ and make a great playlist for your iPod that you can blast at the reception. Does anyone really enjoy the doing the Funky Chicken anyway?
10. Skip the tiered cake that can cost hundreds of dollars, and go with a large, simple sheet cake. Better yet, get a tiered pastry tray and a bunch of cupcakes instead. They’ll taste better, and no one will get stuck in a corner cutting a cake all night.
11. Skip the bridal boutiques and look for your dress in department stores, bargain shops, and online sites like eBay, Etsy, and vintage shops like Unique-Vintage.com.
12. Skip the Save the Date cards! Call or email people, and let them know you’ve picked a date. You’ll save a couple hundred bucks and a branch or two of a small tree.
13. Skip the expensive florist and grab some flowers at a local flower shop or grocery store and make your own bouquet. Use a few buds and some greenery as centerpieces, instead of huge arrangements. Scour thrift shops, garage sales, and eBay for interesting vases, mugs, or tchotchkes to use as fun focal points. For a few bucks, a small, tin watering can filled with daisies can make a greater impression than a pricey rose arrangement.
14. Skip the wedding party. The people who are closest and mean the most to you don’t need to wear a special outfit or hold your bouquet to know they’re important in your life. Write a little note to those people, if you want, thanking them for their support, and save yourself the price of those token wedding party gifts no one really has any use for anyway.
15. Skip the pricey rehearsal dinner and have a pizza party. There’s enough formality in a wedding, and everyone will be happy to blow off some steam before the big day.
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CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 09:46 am: [report]
Good post, even though the majority won’t pick up on it. I however hold out hope, that some will take a couple pointers.
Annika Harris
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 09:58 am: [report]
My cousin used all her family to throw a budget wedding. Our grandmother and great aunt made most of the food. She bought a delicious cake at Sam’s Club and bought some rather classy decorations, like candle votives, at the Dollar or More store. And she had her cousins put up decorations and flowers. Plus, she had the wedding at a location that could accommodate the wedding and reception. Also, if you don’t want to make an iTunes playlist, you or a friend probably knows a DJ who would give you a discount because he’s just happy to have some work.
retro chic
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 10:07 am: [report]
Great article, Wendy… but did you hack my list? The ostentatious weddings get reviewed, the intimate ones get remembered.
I think I’ve been living in an alternate universe having always embraced this approach during all economic times! I daresay this recession has made inroads into common-sense consciousness. Yay!
Wendy Atterberry
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 10:12 am: [report]
I really don’t have anything against ostentatious weddings. I mean, if it’s a couple’s dream to have a big blowout and they can afford it. more power to them. But I hate to think of people going into debt for such a wedding because they can’t imagine any other way to make the occasion special.
tabby
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 10:14 am: [report]
Thanks for the tips! I am planning my own budget wedding.
We are going to use the local county park because it is already decorated by nature, has warm memories from my childhood, and it is cheap! For $200 we can rent a large pavilion made of stone for the whole day and also be able to have the ceremony right there on a suspension bridge. One stop shopping!
Annika Harris
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 10:17 am: [report]
@tabby That sounds like a pretty location.
greenmona011
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 10:20 am: [report]
Awesome article, its nice to know that there are logical people out there, after all its only for one day & the love you have for the other person is more important than overspending on one time day. =) I’m engaged & i plan to use my love for Arts&Crafts;as decorations.(I do origami & Scrapbooking) I also sow, in fact i was thinking of getting started on my dress =D!!!
retro chic
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 10:31 am: [report]
Exactly, Wendy, these times should inspire creativity, not turn a dream into a nightmare rivaling a second mortgage or school loan debt you hear so much of… a win-win, I’d say. And, I still think the intimate ones are lovelier because of the handcrafted touches and the rallying of loving others that make it so.
A post debriefing brides’ 20/20 hindsight feelings of “ostentatious” weddings might be interesting, too.
tosweetheart
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 01:36 pm: [report]
Ebay is great for dresses… I bought mine there for $36 NEW and including shipping. I had it altered in my local area. That is a big savings, as dresses are super expensive for a one day party.
: )
shannac02
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 01:41 pm: [report]
I realize that it’s a totally different world, but coming from a SMALL town with a HUGE family, this is the way we’ve always done things… Friends and family always pitch in and get everything done. There is no wedding coordinator, no expensive florists, no wedding specialty shops… Just us, doing everything. While its not as posh as having designer everything, as long as you are creative or have very creative friends/family, you can make anything look like a million bucks!
sarahwin
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 02:31 pm: [report]
I had a gorgeous wedding for 110 people for less than 10k, straight out of ideas I picked up from Martha Stewart mags—
-Used the lakeside clubhouse at my parent’s lakehouse for free
-Gorgeous gown at sample sale that I later flipped on ebay for MORE than I paid
-DJ was mom’s next door neighbor (free)
-Bought own liquor, good wine by the case, hired local college student to bartend.
-Bought glasses from ikea (cheaper than renting)
-Small cake from local bakery, sheet cake hidden away
-Mom’s friend was a florist—they spent the morning gathering local flowers, also cute tiny painted potted plants scattered on tables.
-Mom actually had a friend who somehow got her free tablecloths to borrow to match wedding colors (great to have a resourceful mom)
-Saw adorable candle/hurricanes on birch platforms in Martha Stewart- had stepdad make birch platforms for me with a tree from their yard, bought cheap hurricanes/candles at xmas tree store, sent them home with guests who loved them
-Skipped a champagne toast for everyone and instead splurged on a stash of extra good stuff for those who actually appreciated it
-Put ad in craigslist for photojournalist style photographer who wanted to build their portfolio—for $600 TOTAL got gorgeous snaps from artsy but totally professional newbie
-Copied ideas from fancy stationers I admired, sent them off to a cheapo digital printer, I think cost a couple hundred bucks total (skipped cheesy tissue, etc).
-And yes, we had awesome food from a local caterer with full staff and sit down dinner.
I am sure we had more tips, and we were lucky to have a gorgeous room with views of the lake, but guests told me it was the most FUN wedding they’d ever been to.
Yellow
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 03:50 pm: [report]
My brother and sister-in-law used many of these same ideas for their wedding, and it was fantastic! Perhaps my favorite money saving idea was their cake—instead of one huge, expensive wedding cake, they got one small cake for each table (ten or so), each in different flavors. It’s far cheaper to fly under the radar and get a dozen delicious cakes from a bakery than it is to red flag your cake order with a big fat “wedding”. And actually, they didn’t even use a bakery, they just enlisted her aunts to bake for them! In addition to the savings, they also provided enough so everyone could find something they liked, and created an instant conversation starter/room circulator. Genius!
retro chic
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 04:26 pm: [report]
Wendy, #10, Skip the Cake… my thoughts exactly… on a previous Wedding post a few days ago: “Cupcakes or other delicacies organically arranged, unique in presentation and for easy serving…” heehee
Sofjna
wrote on April 15 2009 @ 10:44 pm: [report]
@Wendy- I love that you are using your great grandmother’s ring as your engagment ring. I would love to have an old ring like that instead of something mass produced. They’re so pretty, and yours has nice memories behind it. As for the Save the Date cards, I’ve never understood those. I always thought that’s what the invatation was for.
@Yellow- I want to do mini cakes on the tables. I think it would be so much cooler to have each table cut their own cake. Plus, you can have a great centerpiece instead of flowers.
V for Vixen
wrote on April 16 2009 @ 07:51 am: [report]
Right on. My husband and I hated the idea of a big, expensive wedding. We kept things simple, got married at City Hall, had a small reception for close friends and family, and skipped the cake. You don’t HAVE to do anything except pay for the ceremony, so don’t let the bridal industry try to take you hostage!
SimplyDiva
wrote on April 16 2009 @ 09:16 am: [report]
As a wedding planner, you won’t believe what I am about to say….but one of the biggest ways to cut costs is to hire a planner! You can usually find one that will charge you a flat fee based on how big/small your wedding will be and they already know the ways to cut your costs. They also have contacts and inside knowledge of the cheaper deals and steals and can pass those on to you. It’s someone who already knows what you’re trying to find out!
If nothing else, you should at least contact one to find out if you can get a list of vendors in your price range. I have NEVER heard a couple say that they spent more money with a wedding planner.
Here’s just one example…for brides on a budget….I never hire a professional photographer. I call the university and get a photography student in their last year and arrange with the professor for them to receive internship credit for doing a set number of weddings for me FOR FREE!
Western_Red
wrote on April 16 2009 @ 11:49 am: [report]
Uhm, can I say, just skip the traditional wedding? Destination weddings, aside from the travel costs, are much cheaper in terms of extras. My husband and I got married on a beach in Mexico with 18 people and it was fabulous. Most resorts offer free wedding packages with optional buy in extras. We let people do their own thing for the majority of their time in Mexico, just asked them to party with us on our wedding day. Yes, travel can be expensive, but we helped out a few of our friends with travel costs (b/c we wanted them there with us) and still spent less than $5k on the whole shebang. Plus, we didn’t have to smooze with Mom’s hairdresser or Dad’s golfing buddy or sister’s boyfriend of the month - it was all close friends and family.
weddingroadtrip
wrote on April 16 2009 @ 01:27 pm: [report]
I agree with some of the ideas- but I have to say- not really big on the potluck. Inviting people to a celebration but then asking them to bring their own food feels really cheap to me. I’m all for creativity- but I’d rather cook the food myself then ask my friends and family to do it. Then again- they might want to bring their own food if I’m the one in the kitchen
jakrynic
wrote on June 26 2009 @ 07:44 pm: [report]
Looks like you pretty much summed up my wedding! I’m eeking in just under $11K! No wedding party, just my future stepson and a flower girl (he wanted help). I’m growing my own centerpieces - wheatgrass in steel wash basins from IKEA (around $50). Flowers from the pick-your-own place. I booked a venue from a very popular caterer who just opened their own venue and is looking to get the word out(at about half price). Instead of a cake - we are doing cupcakes and a dessert table. I found an awesome photographer who previously worked in the City by recently moved to our area and wants to “do weddings for fun”. My dress is off the rack from Nordstroms and needs no alteration. Finally - our “rehearsal dinner” - Pizza and poker in my parents back yard!