Thoughts From Guys On Our IM: What Was Your Worst Sexual Performance?

Dmun
wrote on July 7 2009 @ 12:13 pm: [report]

I never get whiskey dick. I find that odd, but its still true.

Anyway, my own worst experiences are always a chemistry thing—there’s two girls I’ve slept with and it is ALWAYS bad with them. I’ve done it multiple times, with each, just to be sure—sure enough, terrible.

In one case, I dont blame the girl—we just aren’t good together.

The other one tended to snort like a pig and giggle and moan. She’s very strange.

angel001717
wrote on July 7 2009 @ 12:31 pm: [report]

the brooding law school student is every woman’s dream come true! ah now that would be nice. with him its not just all about the hooking up. my ex was only about the sex. nothing else. it sucked (well, the sucking was good for awhile. emphasis on NOT FOR LONG)

the music nerd. ahahaha. but she showed him, thats good. he needed it! (and dont they all at first?)

40yrolddad
wrote on July 7 2009 @ 12:38 pm: [report]

oh, I can think of a number of times I was effectively “on-call” pending her blood work during fertility treatment - that pretty much blew (is there such as thing as an anti-pun?).  lying in a hospital bed recovering from an appendectomy & your wife’s 1st ? to the doc is:  “so how long do we have to wait before we try again?” can certainly take some excitement out of it (no, we didn’t in hospital)...

bogart4017
wrote on July 7 2009 @ 12:56 pm: [report]

I had a test done where the doctors made an incission and shot a camera up through my groin. One of the unfortunate side effects—no nature whatsoever. Not even morning wood.  my wife didnt believe me. One night she jumped my bones—-nothing! SHe must have rolled around for like an hour. Then she finally gave up and said “you need to see a doctor”. Then i burst into flames.

Mainer
wrote on July 7 2009 @ 01:30 pm: [report]

The early high school 3 second sexcapades were the worst! Just didn’t know what to say. Finally, the excuses stopped: “Well, uh, I have a boner for most of the day anyway - if you look at it wrong it’s going off. So sorry I sucked and you barely had time to tie your hair back.”

By the way - what’s with the double standard. If men can’t get hard he is not a man. What is the equivalent for women? Not getting wet? If that happens then it’s the man’s fault too - “well, you’re just not doing it for me.” I think the pressure is higher for the man to perform. Ergo, men are more likely to get embarrassed if they’re bad. I mean, a woman can be bad in bed - she can be about as much fun as a blow up doll - but she can’t really mess up sex can she? Like if she’s normally good at it, have a bad day?

Justine
wrote on July 7 2009 @ 05:45 pm: [report]

Wow, Amelia. Great article.

Shasta
wrote on July 7 2009 @ 08:18 pm: [report]

Brooding Law Student and Mainer got me thinking:

Do we put so much emphasis on a hard member, that it leads men to ultimately disengage emotionally from sex so that they can perform?  Then we women complain that you’re not attuned to our needs.

stiffinp
wrote on August 11 2009 @ 07:34 am: [report]

Hey, you know something. We guys don’t have all the answers!
My worst moment was when my girlfriend and I were making out in the back seat. I was ready to go down on her for the first time. I was right there with her pubic hair tickling my nose, and…. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. We didn’t talk about it or anything. She went and found someone else in a couple of weeks.

I have since rectified myself of that problem!

calenia
wrote on August 25 2009 @ 07:10 pm: [report]

Bring this column back! I need my guys of IM fix.