The Stunning Downfall Of Jude Law
Posted by: Daniela Guernica
Filed in:
guys
12:10PM, Friday July 31st 2009
My Dearest Jude Law,
It was only a few years ago that I was pining after your sexy European bod. You were smart, sly, and so appealing. But now, that sultry smile that once got me all hot and bothered now looks more like a pervy grin. And you kinda just seem like a douchey losertron. You may be trying to win me back by playing Watson in “Sherlock Holmes,” but to tell you the truth, you may have fallen so far from grace that it’s just not possible. You’re like the male Lindsay Lohan.
After the jump, a look at Jude’s short Up and very long Down.
THE WAY UP
- Jude got his first taste of fame across the pond, doing theater in London. His acting expertise brought him to Broadway in “Indiscretions.” He got a Tony nomination, making him one to watch.
- Jude’s big movie break: the futuristic thriller “Gattaca,” alongside Ethan Hawke and Uma Thurman, as the suicidal but genetically perfect Jerome Eugene Morrow. A blockbuster hit.
- Now a Hollywood stud, Jude only made women want him more when he married actress Sadie Frost in 1997. British power couple!
- Jude nabbed an Oscar nomination for his role as Dickie Greenleaf in “The Talented Mr. Ripley.”
- Jude continued his rise to movie star greatness with 2003’s “Cold Mountain.”
- It’s confirmed: People names Jude Law the “Sexiest Man Alive” in 2004. LOSING HIS SHEEN
- Jude and Sadie called it quits after five years of marriage in a very public divorce and custody battle over their three kids.
- While 2004’s “Closer” was an artsy fave, Jude’s adventure flick “Sky Captain and The World of Tomorrow” was a mediocre ride, even with the help of Angelina Jolie.
- Basically an autobiography of his love life, Jude played a total womanizer in 2004’s “Alfie.”
- Then he went and started dating his “Alfie” co-star, Sienna Miller. They looked good together, but never quite came off quite as classy.
- Losing his dramatic flair, Jude took a “Holiday” in the 2006 mildly successful rom-com. DOWN IN THE DUMPS
- Officially making himself a douche bag, Jude had a full-fledged affair with his kids’ nanny, ending his relationship with Sienna.
- Reveling in his womanizing ways, Jude beds one woman after another.
- Trying to get back into the spotlight, Jude cross-dresses as a tranny for the film “Rage.” The movie looks good, but Jude Law as a tranny is just random.
- Jude puts the cherry on the loser-sundae: It’s announced his former lover Samantha Burke will give birth to his love child.
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tattooed_redhead
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 12:04 pm: [report]
He makes my skin crawl. He always has.
I Go To 11
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 12:18 pm: [report]
I’m reminded of Chris Rock referring to Jude Law as a second-rate Russell Crowe at the Oscars a few years back. I always thought that was funny.
Ginger
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 01:58 pm: [report]
Even back when I gave unfair preference to British actors (as opposed to American ones) in terms of deciding talent/attractiveness, I never saw the appeal of Jude Law. He almost had me in ‘I Heart Huckabees’, but he was still my least favorite person in that movie.
BlueVibe
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 02:33 pm: [report]
I never got over seeing him as Bosie in that movie about Oscar Wilde. I can’t think of him as anything but a bitchy gay boy, which now seems very ironic.
wild-ting
wrote on July 31 2009 @ 07:49 pm: [report]
A skinny anorexic-looking man is never sexy.
SassySexpert
wrote on August 1 2009 @ 11:40 am: [report]
I totes agree that Jude Law went downhill - fast - especially from the way he seemed SO hot when I first became familiar with him many years ago when he was in a cute movie called “Music from Another Room” or something like that.
But seriously, how did I miss a movie with Jude Law as a tranny because, although wild-ting obviously would disagree with me, the only thing sexier to me than a skinny anorexic-looking man is a skinny anorexic-looking man in women’s clothing.
muzician
wrote on August 1 2009 @ 04:20 pm: [report]
I have to say that I saw his “Hamlet” performance at Wyndham’s Theater in London and it was incredible!
taalibba
wrote on August 3 2009 @ 09:14 am: [report]
He’s a great actor, but I pretty much decided to completely seperate his real life from movies a while back if I want to enjoy anything he does.
Of course that’s gotten alot easier to do since he stopped doing one “beautiful amoral slut” role after another. That being said, I did enjoy when his character got karmically screwed over by Clive Owen’s in Closer.
Kati-Anne
wrote on August 3 2009 @ 08:49 pm: [report]
The Frisky, are you aware that when you google “the frisky”, under Results from The Frisky, it goes “sex, relationships, friskyscopes, galleries, style, guys, celebs, Jude Law’?
... I always thought that was strange…
dagss
wrote on August 10 2009 @ 07:52 pm: [report]
Him as Joe in A.I. was my favorite, also the death photographer in Road to Perdition. Like many, he’s incredibly talented, I’ve always thought him kind of “dashing”, but alas, troubled human.
judescountrygirl
wrote on September 7 2009 @ 03:27 pm: [report]
Jude gets sexier the older he gets..He is a great actor..We all have rough patches in our lives..Give the guy a break!!!!!!!!!!!!!