The Fuss About Foreplay
Posted by: DivineCaroline.com
Filed in:
sex
1:00PM, Monday September 7th 2009
I have a confession to make. Before I was married, I used to hate foreplay. I found myself rushing through the preliminaries, anxiously pushing towards the main event. I mean really, who has time for ear nibbles and a kiss on the back of the thigh? I had foolishly assumed that I was more thoroughly evolved, less needy, and more perfectly suited to a heterosexual relationship in terms of my needs and libido. A typical session involved me smiling in tolerance while I submitted to a thorough toe sucking, and then asking for what I had wanted all along. Way back when, I actually endured foreplay. After five years of marriage, I sit here and wonder…what changed?
In the beginning, there was light—in our bedroom I mean. We were a new couple. Sex was exciting. The lights were on. Lingerie was a must. And my future husband was virile and thrilling in every sense. And then, lo and behold, after the first few months of sex, he acquiesced to my requests and foreplay was kept to a minimum. Could it be? Would I be freed from the prison known as petting? We progressed wildly, free of any rules, and then, just as our relationship began to build and deepen, our sex became more and more shallow. He responded to my dissatisfaction with a rather uninspired thirty seconds of nipple-tweaking. I responded to his humdrum technique with less and less passionate involvement. We were engaged, in love, and utterly bored with sex. How could this happen to me? I’d always been the girl who loved sex in any form—boring or otherwise. Then it hit me. I loved sex in any and every form, and our coupling had become just one form—formulaic. Read more ...
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Dave The Rave
wrote on September 7 2009 @ 06:46 pm: [report]
This article was published over two years ago! Maybe they waited until now to show it here because either they finally got what they wanted or just gave up.
Yes, sex can be many things to many people, but it takes teamwork to get thru the rough spots.
snap
wrote on September 7 2009 @ 06:57 pm: [report]
insightful article!
wonderfultonight
wrote on September 7 2009 @ 10:06 pm: [report]
I’m glad these two worked things out - if, indeed they did - or did they just “settle?” “NO physical chemistry?” They were engaged and they were already bored? I think it’s a shame that she turned her guy down when he was only trying to please her. Foreplay is important and so is afterplay. There are a great many ways to keep sex from becoming boring. I couldn’t be in this type of relationship myself, but if they are happy with it…...OK - different strokes for different folks.
babylaceface
wrote on September 8 2009 @ 12:50 am: [report]
@sexy4u - say yes to sex toys! so much fun when you use them as a surprise. like hmmm i wonder what could be in his pocket tonight? handcuffs! makin sexytime even more fun!
@wonderfultonight - I agree with you completely. foreplay and afterplay can sometimes be the best part. its sad that they were having problem so soon! yikes
Tart and Soul
wrote on September 8 2009 @ 10:30 am: [report]
Sex without foreplay simmers. Sex with foreplay is volcanic! No encounter should be without it.
yesaguy
wrote on September 9 2009 @ 05:51 am: [report]
i would say either way, and foreplay i great for me to do toward the women im with, but from my stand part ( i dont care to much for a women to sit and just play around with me and tease me, but dont get me wrong it is fun every once in a long while but thats it ) Dont read into that and think i dont like foreplaying with my partner ( cause that is not what was said ) most women i have been with do go stir crazy for foreplay. but i will say if you cant be open with your partner either by body motion, or actualy talking. well you got a 3 in 1,000 chance of its gona be everything you love. yes may like it or like it alot, but to enjoy every bit from the second befor you even think of haveing sex to the end, and being in that just pure exstacy, noting like it in the world. please i beg you women who are not open and feel ashemd ( for some reason, i dont know why ) but speak up and if your not pleased with your body, well we can tell and we get tired of telling you know we like it or love it. i mean realy after telling you 10 times ( enough is enough ) it is a major turn off
stiffinp
wrote on September 10 2009 @ 06:59 pm: [report]
Maybe she should try a different partner. Like the character Richard Fish said once about relationships. It went something like,“After a while of knowing someone, and things start to get old, all you have left is the sex. And if you don’t have that….” Get the point!
Jitterbugs232
wrote on September 24 2009 @ 06:16 pm: [report]
Foreplay all the way couldn’t get it all started without to get a great finish