Quickies!: Lorena Gallo Throws Down With John Bobbitt

retro chic
wrote on May 6 2009 @ 05:20 pm: [report]

Yoo-hoo, anyone? My Flash Player just went on strike. Does anyone know what items were in the “Women still need help in deciphering the top 10 dude breakup excuses because we usually just say exactly what we mean. [Lemondrop]” post? Link:
http://www.lemondrop.com/2009/05/06/top-ten-dude-break-up-excuses-and-what-they-really-mean/

Thank you!
rc

tabby
wrote on May 6 2009 @ 05:36 pm: [report]

@retro chic, Here you go:

10. I don’t want to hold you back from living your own life. “You’re holding me back—from the chance of having a threesome before I die.”

9. Commitment totally freaks me out. “I liked it better in my comfort zone—when I could text you drunk at 3 a.m. for a night of sloppy sex that neither of us would remember very well in the morning.”

8. I need to concentrate on my music career. “Getting wasted on canned beer in a garage while obliterating what’s left of my hearing is just more important to me than finding an honest emotional connection right now.”

7. I’ve been hurt before, and I can’t trust anyone right now. “My ex-girlfriend tried to convince me that an ‘open relationship’ was natural. She also told me that candle wax is a suitable bedroom aid. Turns out she was wrong on both counts—and I’ve got the scars to prove it.”

6. I don’t want to ruin our friendship. “If we keep this up, I might screw up any chance of ever sleeping with your friends.”

5. We’re just at different points in our lives. “You’re thinking about going back to grad school to finally get that degree in social work. I’m thinking about eating an entire pizza while watching a “Family Guy” marathon.”

4. We both need to grow as people first. “I’ve got a lot of juvenile partying to do before my idea of a ‘hot night’ has anything to do with renting a Matthew McConaughey rom-com.”

3. I feel tied down and need a little room to breathe. This means your dude is feeling squirmy—and thinks YOU suddenly want a baby or something.

2. It’s not you, it’s me. This is the classic cop-out for a good reason: It’s vague enough to mean absolutely nothing. It also makes the dude sound tortured and mysterious—which is a one-way ticket to intense breakup sex.

1. You’re too good for me. Flattery will get a dude everywhere. The best part? This one’s probably true.

retro chic
wrote on May 6 2009 @ 06:07 pm: [report]

Thanks, tabby! Much better.
—-
I swear, I can hear drum rolls and Dave Letterman’s voice reading one of his Top 10 lists! (maybe it is one). Dear-dear, I used N°2 once or twice… but friends say they get 6/8/10 the most.

hawaiianpeach
wrote on May 6 2009 @ 08:12 pm: [report]

From the looks of this clip John DESERVED to have his knob bobbed!