Politically Incorrect: From Miley Cyrus To Mary Rambin
Posted by: Amelia McDonell-Parry
Filed in:
news
3:30PM, Tuesday February 3rd 2009
In recent years, a bevy of celebrities—from A-list to Z-list—have been busted using language or behaving in a way that goes against typical societal notions of political correctness. And thanks to the Internet, everyone on the planet is the wiser. This week, a photograph of Miley Cyrus slanting her eyes in a mock-Asian gesture hit the web. Fans, haters, and the Asian-American community were on her instantly, demanding an apology. Suffice it to say, if you’re anywhere near the public eye, you have to be smart if you’re going to be offensive.
The fact of the matter is, most of us have offensive, crude, off-color moments, and they may even be moments we share with among friends—as Miley probably thought she was doing. But, if busted, we would probably be quick to reassure that the racist or homophobic or sexist joke we just told, does not, in any way, mean that we are racist, homophobic, or sexist in general. And we aren’t! But racism and sexism and homophobia are not so dead—or dead at all—that offensive jokes are anything other than offensive, especially when someone overhears and tells you they’re offended.
Take Mary Rambin. I SO hate to bring her up again, but she keeps throwing up softballs and I’m up to bat. Last night, as Mary was “lifecasting” getting her hair cut, her fellow blog, Julia Allison, posted this exchange.
Mary: I’m not like spiky hair crazy girl.
Julia: You are now!
Mary: I look like a dyke from the back.
Julia: This is true. But a hot one.
So listen, I have used the word “dyke” plenty of times before, among friends. Sure, I could totally pull out the age old “but I have soooo many gay friends and family members” excuse to justify it, but the thing is, I know using that word is offensive to some people, so I would never say it in mixed company and especially not on a public blog allegedly read by “hundreds of thousands of people.” (I also wouldn’t stereotype what “dykes” look like.) And some of those readers said they were offended, I definitely wouldn’t just alter the post so my offending remarks were removed, as if they had never been said. I would acknowledge that I had offended people and that I understood why my remark was offensive, and that putting it on a public blog, as if it was no big deal, was even more offensive because it assumes that everyone else is just as cool with that kind of language. When you make a living providing a service or entertainment to an audience, you have a responsibility to that audience. It does with the territory.
Mary and Miley are not alone. Mel Gibson was caught using anti-Semitic language when pulled over by a police officer a few years ago; when Isiah Washington reportedly called his “Grey’s Anatomy” co-star a derogatory homophobic epithet, the entire blogosphere knew within hours; and Prince Harry has been photographed wearing a Hitler costume and caught on video using a racist word to describe a Arab man and the U.K. papers have been all over him for it, as further evidence that he’s un-King-like. So, celebrities, take note. If you’re going to say or do something that’s offensive to a community of people, know your audience—and if a camera or microphone is anywhere nearby. And most of all, be ready to apologize, because even if you really, really didn’t intend to offend, you did.
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par3
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 03:46 pm: [report]
this also means ‘i’m so blazed right now my eyes are _______ed out’... fill in the blanks budsmokers.
jazzyj
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 05:05 pm: [report]
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve been called snowflake, breeder, white bitch or some reference to the gender of the person I act out my dirty Easter bunny fantasies with, I would not be in need of employment. I’m sort of amazed at the double standard, and I wonder how it’s going to stop when only white people are held to the standard. I mean, imagine if I - an evil cracker - called some non-crackerfied stranger a food item related to his or her skin color? How many white people really believe they can do that? How long would it take to hit youtube if I went around Memphis, TN, calling people in gas stations words like snowflake applied to a different race? I can’t even bring myself to write an example here. I realize there are some major historical factors going into this, but really, when are we ALL going to say enough is enough? We can’t really ask of other people anything we aren’t willing to give ourselves. The further back into history so much goes, the more everyone is just perpetuating it. We really need to move on, and if we do, maybe, just maybe twenty years or fifty years from now we won’t need to say politically correct anymore because biases will die out.
btw, par3, I would totally think that Miley was high if it weren’t for the Asian dude whose back is turned. It may just be a coincidence and she just puffed a blunt with her buddies there. Imagine how awful that would be? Out herself as a pot smoker or play a racist? What would you choose in her Disney position?
theothergyllenhaal
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 05:26 pm: [report]
“So listen, I have used the word “dyke” plenty of times before, among friends…I know using that word is offensive to some people, so I would never say it in mixed company and especially not on a public blog allegedly read by “hundreds of thousands of people.””
I think you just did.
Amelia
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 05:28 pm: [report]
@theothergyllenhaal Only in the context of this post, criticizing the casual use on Mary Rambin’s blog.
jazzyj
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 05:40 pm: [report]
Omg, this is exactly what I’m talking about. If people don’t want to hear the d word, don’t use it. How many times did someone say the dreaded d word on this week’s episode of the L Word? How many times was it said in the lesbian bar around the corner from my house last weekend? We can’t reasonably expect everyone to have his or her own dictionary of acceptable language based on skin color or sexual preference and expect NOT to be othered by the very segregated dictionaries we are all so in favor of. It’s a vicious cycle with perpetuation coming from all sides.
eden
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 06:23 pm: [report]
Miley Cyrus is what… 16? Yeah, she needs to be smarter, but cut her *some* slack, she’s a kid.
elthrilla
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 06:39 pm: [report]
I kinda gotta agree with theothergyllenhaal…
Chelle
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 06:45 pm: [report]
I wonder what the guy in front of her thought when he saw the picture. @jazzyj- The racial slur, “cracker”, has nothing to do with food. It actually dates back to the days of slavery when there was a “whip cracker”. So, unfortunately, it’s more offensive than you thought. Snowflake sounds pretty to me but it’s not necessarily the word itself, it’s the intention and the attitude of the way it is used.
jazzyj
wrote on February 3 2009 @ 06:59 pm: [report]
@Chelle - for real - and how moronic too because I don’t think any whip crackers are still around. In fact, I bet they ALL died decades ago. I wonder what the guy in front of her thought too.
@theothergyllenhall - I’m sorry for my earlier comment. You didn’t use the word and I think that your point had nothing to do with certain groups of people being able to use it and not others. That’s the only thing that really irritates me. I don’t like to hear women being called whores, so I don’t call other women whores. That was all I was saying.
HarlemGirl
wrote on February 4 2009 @ 10:16 am: [report]
@jazzyj -where do you live that people are calling you names all of the time?
Unfortunately, we live in a world where EVERYONE can’t say EVERYTHING…grow up, get over it, its life.
I mean really, why do you want to say “it” so bad? Why the uproar because you can’t use certain words? For instance, why would this kid at my office be so upset that he got punched in the nose for calling a black kid the “n-word” at a bar? I laughed and laughed and laughed…he would have had every right to stand up for himself if this kid had called him any of the names that were referenced above.
His reason? He thought it was ok because he heard them use it.
TheIneffablesoandso
wrote on February 4 2009 @ 04:23 pm: [report]
I don’t get it. It’s okay to say privately but not publicly? I don’t see this private public distinction when it comes to using terms that can be construed as derogatory. Would it be okay say for a white person to use the n-word at home because their friends and family don’t mind as long as they don’t publicly say it? I don’t follow the logic. Mary Rambin’s public apology now echoes your sentiments, suggesting (at least in my interpretation of her post) that it wasn’t the casual use of the term that was offensive but the fact that it was posted publicly that made it a problem. I totally disagree. But to each her own.
TheIneffablesoandso
wrote on February 4 2009 @ 04:39 pm: [report]
And to clarify, it wasn’t just the use of the term I took issue with but also the fact that it was used in a derogatory manner and it perpetuated/created sterotypes. Doing that in private among friends doesn’t make it okay.
Mary did not apologize for her actual comment or show that she thinks it inherently wrong. Her apology, at least as I read it, seemed to suggest that her only problem with the conversation was the fact that it had been made public.
MoxieintheCity
wrote on February 4 2009 @ 04:49 pm: [report]
The most offensive part of the Mary/Julia exchange is the fact that Julia Allison POSTED IT ON HER BLOG in the hopes people would link to NonSociety. Seriously. How much lower do these women have to go just for some page views? You just know Julia was sitting there the whole time Mary was talkign thinking, “Oh my God. This is blog GOLD! I’ll post this, then Gawker will repost it, then The Frisky, Then Salon…”
This woman is heinous.
And Mary…I know you’re reading this. Get out now. She’s totally bringing you down with her.
csr48614
wrote on February 9 2009 @ 04:33 pm: [report]
Ya… the Miley thing… for sakes, she’s a KID!! Anyone that thinks she was “being mean” or intended anything other than being silly and having fun w/ her friends obviously never WAS or HAD a kid! Pleeeeeease! These kids have to grow up fast enough. Do they have to learn PC the hard way too?
Slack- definately… Loosten up! Take life a little more seriously and yourself a little LESS seriously and quit building your soap box out of a CHILD!