Obama’s Got His Own Dildo

There are certain places I expect the President of the U.S. to pop up: CNN, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, etc. Since President Obama is unusually stylish, it’s no surprise that he and the super glam Michelle regularly grace the cover of non-news magazines. The one place I was not expecting to see the handsome face of our fearless leader: a dildo. Oh yes, he’s really got his own stimulus package. Personally, I’ll pass. Luckily for those of us who find that politics rarely leads to fun in the bedroom, but want to show their patriotism in an unusual manner, there is plenty of oddball Obama merchandise out there.

1. Obama “Head Of State” Dildo: I wonder if this dildo was designed as a compliment or an insult to Obama? It could really go either way. [$34.95, Head of State]
2. Obama Chia Pet: Chia pets are oddities in and of themselves. I suppose if you are a massive Obama fan and can’t get enough of him through traditional media, you might as well grow your own. [$18.99, Joseph Enterprises, Amazon]
3. Obama Toilet Paper: On the one hand. wiping your ass with Obama’s face seems wrong (in more ways than one). On the other hand, however, the people at Jeremy Inc. could have put anyone’s face on the toilet paper. Perhaps Obama should see it as an honor that he was chosen over Robert Pattinson. [$9.99, Jeremy Inc]
4. Obama Glow In The Dark Refrigerator Magnet: Because Obama will show us the light that will lead us out of the darkness…or to the fridge for a midnight ice cream snack. [$9.99, Rovakada, Amazon]
5. Obama Wine: I wouldn’t serve this wine at a dinner party. Political Brawls may ensue and at $198 per bottle, I want to sip my wine in bipartisan peace.
6. Obama Coloring Book: This is certainly one way to make America color blind. With the Color Me Extraordinary Barack Obama Coloring Book everyone can be one color, multi colored, striped, dotted…
7. Obama Hot Sauce: All you need is one squirt of Obama hot sauce to add a bit of spice to your life. [$6.45, Hot Sauce]
8. Obama Paper Towel Holder: Obama did say he wanted to clean up Washington. It’s not our fault he didn’t specify how. [28.95, Etsy.com]