Mind Of Man: Online Dating Is A Waste Of Time
Posted by: John DeVore
Filed in:
guys
9:00AM, Thursday June 18th 2009
Groucho Marx once famously quipped “I don’t care to belong to a club that would have me as a member.” I sort of feel the same way about online dating sites. There has got to be a better way to meet people, people. Sadly, mental telepathy does not work. Unless you know what I was just thinking, in which case, e-mail me.
I’ve recently begun… researching popular dating sites. Not because I need a date. Ho, no, no, no. I don’t need a date. I’m up to my man boobs in hot lady action. There’s an 85% chance of boobs forecast in my love life. I am the Mayor of Vagtown. No, this research is for you, for all of you. It’s a testament to my generosity of spirit I waded through these interweb love sewers in order to impart some sort of wisdom. Here’s the wisdom: dating sites blow.
Let me get this straight: I’m going to spend a ton of time crafting a persona that is a borderline dishonest amplification of the personality traits I think other people will find attractive so I can find someone who’s done the same thing, and we can both go out and discover that we’re equally compatible doucheopotamuses.
Possibly, if I was in prison, an Alaskan crab fisherman or a morbidly obese shut-in so humongous I had to wash myself with a ShamWow stapled to a broom handle, I could see the value in such sites. But I’m not isolated, nor confined to a forklift. I don’t need a middleman brokering a get together between the potential woman of my dreams and my own abilities to self-sabotage and humiliate myself. I can do this sans an interweb intermediary.
This might or might not be a totally uninformed opinion. The extent of my research began and ended with me signing up for OK Cupid, and failing to finish my profile. Somewhere on OK Cupid, there’s a John DeVore in Queens floating about. I couldn’t even bring myself to pick a pseudonym, which just seemed like the first of many lies required to meet anyone. Do I call myself OptimusGandalf and admit from the get-go that I’m an alpha nerd? Do I overshare a little too much and pick EdgarAllanEeyore? Or do I just admit to being a smartass, pretentious creep and go for HumbertHumbert?
I tried to fill out the profile, but instead, it just filled me with a quiet rage. The self-summary section was baffling. It pushed me into an existential identity crisis. Who am I? Or more importantly, who am I when it comes to who I want someone else to think I am, so they will contact me, go out with me, and eventually touch my genitals. Am I sensitive guy, or a romantic, or sarcastic? Maybe I’m all three. I love long walks, going to see live indie bands, and wha-a-a-atever. I made sure to pepper everything with winking non-sequiturs and casual attempts at pop profundity. Then there was the section where I define myself by the books, movies, and music I listen to. My music list was a near impenetrable list of overly eclectic bands that reflect my excellent taste, punctuated by “and Genesis.” My movies were all ‘80s flicks, foreign films, and David Lynch. By the time I go to books, and wrote “Pynchon,” I was in a full-fledged state of self-loathing.
And then I got to the super annoying question that asked about the first thing people notice about me, and all I could write was “my balls on their face.” Which was totally inappropriate, of course, and I gave up. I gave up, stared blankly at a wall, and ate two toaster waffles. Let me get this straight: I’m going to spend a ton of time crafting a persona that is a borderline dishonest amplification of the personality traits I think other people will find attractive so I can find someone who’s done the same thing, and we can both go out and discover that we’re equally compatible doucheopotamuses. I do not need help in this department. Thank you very much. It’s like a masquerade party in the Twilight Zone: I take off my Brad Pitt mask just so I can reveal Sloth from “The Goonies.”
There are, no doubt, many of you who have met the love of your life via online dating sites. Good for you. Congratulations on basically winning the lottery. I firmly believe I have a better chance of getting a girlfriend dressed like Zeus, stopping women on the street, and bellowing, “Rut with me, mortal beauty, and feel thine mighty, fleshy thunder!” Not that I want a girlfriend. I just broke up with six the other day.
I can deal with the risks of love. The threat of heartbreak is what makes finding that one person who sparks your fuse so precious. But I have to be honest, the online dating thing freaked me out. It touched a nerve, and I’m flummoxed as to why. The only conclusion I could come up with was that, maybe, we deserved them. Perhaps online dating sites accurately reflect a generation of singles so entitled to instant happiness and acceptance, we flock to digital artifices that both feed and coddle our egos. Virtual environments where we can indiscriminately reject dishonest projections of identity, while simultaneously being insulated from the very rejection we dole out. A play land of false romantic promises, and deferred risk. A freaking solipsistic waste of time.
I don’t really know how to meet anyone anymore. Maybe I’ll open a 1970’s style single bar like the Regal Beagle in “Three’s Company.” I’ve heard tales of these places, where singles met to chat and hook up, devoid of modern day phalanxes of disinterested females and the pick-up predators these unfriendly cliques inspired. I will call it John DeVore’s Love Hut.
I’m not the type who demands you do as I say, not as I do. So for now, the only way I know how to meet anyone is to sit in my fourth floor walk up in Queens, stare blankly at walls, eat toaster waffles, and squeeze out telepathic “what’s ups.”
TheFrisky.com is part of the Turner Sports and Entertainment Digital Network
Riley
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 09:17 am: [report]
I prefer a Sloth mask. Way cooler than Brad Pitt.
LinSea
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 09:41 am: [report]
I’ve never dated online but this was HILARIOUS!!!
thanks for the laugh
becktasm
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 09:59 am: [report]
I disagree. I met my boyfriend online (on okcupid, actually), and he’s wonderful. I love him very much. The problem here seems to be with you, not with online dating in general. I don’t recall feeling any self loathing while filling out my profile. And actually, their way of matching (by answering all those multiple choice questions) is pretty spiffy, and it works. My boy and I have so much in common it boggles the mind sometimes.
Maybe online dating really just isn’t for you- maybe you like the initial chance meeting, the fear of rejection, the chance to muck it up horribly with one wrong word, and the white lies one tells and hears when meeting someone for the first time. But I think online dating is wonderful. It gives you chance to really get to know someone (all those late night phone calls) before wasting your time or money on dinner with them, and a chance to meet someone you could really love without having to dredge through all the other billions of strangers in the world as well.
Bottom line: I think you should keep an open mind.
sadie
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 10:19 am: [report]
I like the idea of online dating but could never get into it myself. I am not against it for other people. My grievance with it is how awkward it would be to go on a date with a complete stranger and sit across a table from this stranger for hours with a romantic construct already established. I am meeting a stranger with the goal of having sex. Too too weird and uncomfortable. People that can power through that kind of awkwardness, more power to them.
When I was single I met guys at parties or through friends or at DJ nights/concerts. If I thought a guy was at all interesting I’d invite him to do stuff with me and my friends (no one on one dates) until I got to know him well enough to decide if I liked him enough for a real date. I just needed other people around when I hung out with new guys so the awkwardness wasn’t so intense.
delovely
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 10:21 am: [report]
Did you see the earlier posts on the Frisky?
People these days meet on Craiglist’s Missed Connections. Duh. Way more legit.
EarthGoddess
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 11:40 am: [report]
I met my husband online, but not through a “dating site” so maybe it’s a little different when the intent is clearly romantic in nature. We met as friends to hang out, however we fell in love at first site and knew that the whole “just friends” thing wasn’t gonna happen for us. I actually felt instantly at ease when we met, and not at all nervous, since we already knew so much about each other.
Most of the younger people I know that are in relationships met online. It seems to be the way everyone “meets” anymore, at least in my circle. It’s no longer “How did you two meet?” but “What site were you two on when you started talking?” It’s normal now.
resullins
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 12:14 pm: [report]
Ah, I have to agree with both sides of the fence on this one. I tried the online dating, and the profile-filling-out made me want to rip off my leg and club a baby seal with it. (Don’t get offended, just a joke).
But I also met my current boyfriend on HotorNot.com (stop judging me, I was bored). It’s a site where you get some keywords and a paragraph… and you can leave those blank if you want. Then you literally judge people on how they look (shallow, I know, but rating all the women 1’s makes me feel better about myself) and then if you wish, you can choose to talk to them. My boyfriend and I just started talking on the phone for 3 hours a night, and the rest is history.
So maybe what I experienced was more like meeting someone randomly online… and not so much actual online dating.
shannac02
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 12:57 pm: [report]
Oh, JD, I love you soooo!!!! You are SOOOOOO funny! I love your posts… Do you make t-shirts for your groupies? Cuz, I would like to have one, please?
landesign
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 01:04 pm: [report]
I met my wife in a grocery store where I was stocking shelves. She couldn’t find something and I was very, very
helpful.
brandyalexander
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 01:07 pm: [report]
Granted, there are some real losers on online dating sites, but the fact that some of them have literally millions of members means you are bound to find someone great. I found my current boyfriend in less than 24 hours (no, not kidding), we exchanged three or four emails, talked once, met on Valentine’s Day, and have been together almost five months now.
It may not work for everyone, but there are benefits, like the increased number of people to choose from, and the ability to find others with similar interests. Also, its nice to know that people on these sites are actually looking for relationships, and will tell you plainly, in their profile, what kind of relationship they want.
Jamie Lee
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 01:08 pm: [report]
i have officially added doucheopotamus to my lexicon…Thank you
resullins
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 01:48 pm: [report]
@Jamie: I also am going to have to pick up that coloquialism. I’ve used it once or twice, but have NEVER known how to spell it.
Thanks John!!!
CJSCampbell
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 02:29 pm: [report]
I agree almost wholeheartedly with Sadie.
And the “my balls on their face” line made the soda i was drinking go down the wrong pipe
writergirl
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 04:44 pm: [report]
John, you are funny. The “my balls on their face” line had me spewing ice tea across my monitor.
Instead of crafting an on-line profile you think would MAKE people like you, did you ever consider just being honest?
My husband and I met on-line. Different site than the one you mentioned. I actually specifically filled OUT a profile (and paid the fee!) to be able to meet him. I was bored one night and had done a free search on the site, and he was one of my matches. I saw his picture, read his profile and knew—KNEW—I was going to marry him.
His profile was totally honest. Mine was totally honest. And despite that we met and fell in love anyway.
On line dating does carry some risks. I didn’t date anyone but my husband for reasons stated above. He dated some other women and they were purely insane—his words, not mine. Friends of ours did some on-line dating and it didn’t lead anywhere. Yes, there are horror stories—probably more than good ones—but it isn’t a bad option.
SpecialK
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 04:54 pm: [report]
As Always - Hilarious and right on the money! I too am adding doucheopotamus to my vocabulary. I want that and it’s dictionary entry on my T-Shirt please…
duckie
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 06:53 pm: [report]
Awesome and hilarious. And for some more scientific findings the APA concluded this in a paper about eHarmony: there is a 1 in 500 chance of marrying a match. The average subscriber gets 1.5 matches a month- if that subscriber would date all the matches it would take 346 dates and 19 years to reach a 50% chance of getting married.
there is also a great article in the mag. Scientific American Mind by Robert Epstein on online dating that also suggests these websites: http://www.singleboersen-vergleich.de/dossier-partnervermittlung/us-stanford.pdf and http://www.pewinternet.org/Reports/2006/Online-Dating.aspx
I do know one couple who met on a dating site who are together and very happy.. but I know many more people who have found disappointment.
Lucas Hardeman
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 08:12 pm: [report]
Dude, I’ve tried my hand at all facets of the online dating game. I’m 21-years-old, and as a general rule, nobody my age should really be using these sites, ever. Be that as it may, I have used Match, eHarmony, Adult Friend Finder, Yahoo Personals, Craigslist, a number of (insert city here) Singles.net sites, even JDate (and I know, maybe like three Jewish people), and not one time did I ever actually communicate with, much less find a date.
Devore has a point in pointing out the dumbass questions we’re forced to answer in each profile, in an attempt to make ourselves marketable to the wide array of other fakers and agoraphobic daters staring wistfully at their computer screens.
Call me cynical, but I’ve been raised to understand that communication between two potential lovers is best fostered in PERSON. Not someone compiling a physical and emotional wishlist of what they want their perfect date to be.
Anybody else with me on this?
I Go To 11
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 08:28 pm: [report]
Hey, I met my fiance on OK Cupid! One of my friends also met her fiance on OK Cupid. I know lots of people who’ve met their significant others/fiances/spouses via dating sites. It’s better than trying to navigate the bar scene, in my opinion.
Granted, I had some disappointments with OK Cupid before finally meeting my fiance (like Napoleonic Complex Guy and Unmedicated Bipolar Guy), but at least it worked out in the end.
canadiancutie
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 09:01 pm: [report]
I’ve done online dating. I actually met a guy who I dated for 1.5 years on plentyoffish.com. However, as a general rule, there is way more failure than there is success and most of the people you meet online are weirdos or the type you would relegate to the “friend” category for various reasons (I did meet a guy who I turned into one of my best friends on there… no spark on my part but he’s a great guy).
Generally speaking, if you’re in your 20s I would prefer the old-fashioned methods. However older people (50+) seem to stick exclusively to online dating so I would say that is the best avenue for them.
TexasRanchBuck
wrote on June 18 2009 @ 10:46 pm: [report]
I have met really fantastic intelligent women on Match.com
An Airline pilot, a Federal Judge, Several CEO, a few MDs, flight Attentants, Models, Several Ex Miss USA somethings, book author,
Almost married two of them. One was the best match I have ever had. Dating a stunning RN, 41, College Grad, Outdoors lady, slim, trim, huge brown eyes, long brown hair 5’4” about 120#, great legs and hard tanned body.
I am 67- so don’t try to tell me it doesn’t work.
-Happy trails…
-Tink
DontHaveAnyCoolName
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 04:13 am: [report]
For those who are so negative on the online method, I gotta ask…aren’t there “fakers” in real life? Does that make them better than the online type? When you bemoan the poor odds of meeting “your match” online, have you ever estimated the number of people you encounter in real life, and ALSO have relatively little success in finding a “hit”? I haven’t either, but I bet the odds are WAY worse than online. I think that online dating sites should be taken for what they are: Another way to encounter people in whom you might be interested. No more and no less. One advantage for online I see is that, for the fraction of the people that are at least semi-honest (who is ever really completely honest from the outset, online or in real life), you get some insight into them. And one huge advantage is: you know they are looking too. Yes, you encounter some people who misrespresent themselves and their intentions, and yes the odds of a “hit” are not betting odds, but so what? They call them online “dating” sites, but I think of them simply as another alternative to encountering people…no more an no less.
brandyalexander
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 07:11 am: [report]
@ the last poster, that’s exactly right. Its just another scene, really. The percentage of fakes and weirdos is just about the same as you would find in any coffee shop or bar. If you live in a small town like I do, it really increases your chances of finding a good partner.
And yes, there is something to be said for knowing they are looking, too. I’ve always just sort of fell into relationships half-consciously. So for me, it was nice to meet someone who knew what he wanted as much as I did, and to go about it in a straight-forward and purposeful way.
Kiki T
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 07:55 am: [report]
and you can always try the line , “Hey Baby, what’s your sign?”
brandyalexander
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 08:52 am: [report]
Haha, true. I won’t go wasting any time with the astrologically incompatible (geminis!), either, cause its all up there to see, along with fave music (won’t waste my time hooking up with someone who listens to Creed) and whether or not that person sees him/herself married, with kids, and even how many. Perfect for the nosy and obsessive like myself!
Molly Jean
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 10:25 am: [report]
Hilarious, as usual! I agree - online dating is not for everyone…it sort of scares me, but I think it’s great that people are successfully hooking up - it’s just not for some of us.
But, don’t listen to me since I’m CONVINCED I’m going to meet my beloved like this: I’m going to be bowling with friends & drop an earring or something. Then, later that night, an impossibly handsome janitor(/“starving artist”) is going to find it & say “oh I must find the beautiful girl who wore this earring.” Then he is going to search the entire city for me, find me & we are going to live happily ever after.
Different strokes, I guess.
TexasRanchBuck
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 11:46 am: [report]
It works
the RN I am datign was on 3 dating site but had dropped off and had moved to another city. Using the info I got a from all 3 sites, match.com being the best
I was able to figure out her real e- mail and when I send a bunch of possible yahoo addressed e mails- ONE got through she responded. We met. Sparks flew! We talked for 12 hours straight. Since I had seen her pix I knew whats he looked like and when we met it was love at first sight.
Internet dating works!
Tink
A happy Love story- thanks Match.com
TOO_DOPE
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 12:09 pm: [report]
This touches on why I deleted my Myspace page after 4 years of “myspacing it”
You sit there and pick out the BEST possible pictures of yourself throwin’ up the deuce deuce with your friends at last nights party, choose what to type in your “interests” which are probably lies anyway and basically make up this false image to make yourself feel better. NOT cute.
EarthGoddess
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 12:36 pm: [report]
@TOO_DOPE: MySpace is actually how I met my husband, so I love that site, although I’ve outgrown it now and much prefer Facebook. I only had my profile for a month when we began talking, so it must have been fate that made me sign up. I guess it’s not for everyone, but he online thing worked great for me! I met the man of my dreams within weeks ...
I actually was MORE myself on my MySpace profile, because the anonymity of the Internet allowed me to express myself a little more than I normally would in real life. This site is also that way for me ... I discuss things here that I wouldn’t dream of talking about face to face.
DancerNinja
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 02:20 pm: [report]
I recently started dabbling with online sites. “Dabbling” because I can’t seem to get myself to log on with the regularity required to initiate anything meaningful beyond “I like cats, don’t have any.”
loveitlala
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 03:01 pm: [report]
Wow duckie I love those stats. The thing about online dating is that you have to really, really try. If you are active on the site they will give you a ton of matches. I was on eharmony for a month and got about 10-20 new matches per day. Most people get roped into a year-long contract, stop logging in and evaluating matches, and likely stop recieving matches. I think 1 in 500 chance of marrying any one match is pretty good… especially when you have the brain to weed down their matches even more.
loveitlala
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 03:07 pm: [report]
Anyways, it took me two dates to find my husband. :D But yeah, John, filling out those profiles feels so high stakes! I recently emptied my facebook, because I really don’t need to define myself to my friends in so many words.
bbpickles
wrote on June 19 2009 @ 06:02 pm: [report]
Doucheopotamus! I love it!
I sooo just did a 3 day trial on match.com! Every guys profile says the same thing…Im caring, honest, looking for miss right! WHAT!? How come I haven’t met 1 of those 8,000 men at starbucks or something? Then I thought there has to be a reason this self described loyal, intelligent, good looking man with nothing to give but love, is looking for love on the internet! Probably because he’s a doucheopotamus!
@sadie- I completely agree with the awkwardness of online dating, and the hanging out before one on one’s.
seygra20
wrote on June 20 2009 @ 03:15 pm: [report]
online dating sucks only a bunch of sexual pervs online
stef
wrote on June 22 2009 @ 05:54 am: [report]
The problem with online dating is the surprise element… You really don’t know what your going to get. You think you might have found the person of your dreams, but than they turn out to be a serial killer. But this can be said true with both online dating and meeting a person in real life. It’s all a gamble, and if you are willing to take the risk. Take it.
HitOrMissJudy
wrote on June 22 2009 @ 12:44 pm: [report]
Online dating only widens your pool of potential dates. Quit overthinking it and just activate your profile. If you see someone you want to go out with, ask her. Just like you would if you met her in a bar. FYI, I’ve met far more mental cases in bars than I did online, though this may be because while my freak magnet is a very powerful thing, it apparently can’t reach through the internet. Phew.
TagYerIt
wrote on June 23 2009 @ 06:23 am: [report]
Sadly enough, this article was far more entertaining than any of my online dating experiences…snarfed my coffee laughing…
TexasRanchBuck
wrote on June 23 2009 @ 08:33 am: [report]
I met three widows who husband meet them on lien at match.Com all three marriage worked.
Remember the profile is a work picture of you Your photo up to 16 to 21 pix on some sites show you at your best or worst.
Remember the computer/on line is a telephone with photos if your woman and list your stats as 5’1” x 180# you will only attract Men who prefer rotund woman.
If your honest with your profile you Will get responses woman who write a 50 word profile are not serious and get zip.
match.com guarantees if after 6 months you have not met the man you want, you get another six months fee.
I have tried them all an Match.com is the best. You eliminate dorks & nerd by mail chose only to chat with those men who appeal to you.
Meet in a public place, and ask to see his drivers
license. get his office home cell number. Call his work number to see if he has a job.
call his home at 9 PM Friday night and see if a woman answerers. Many married men in the ranks, so beware.
After you screen them and meet its not different than any other couples first meeting. The Internet never connected anyy one; its two people seeking one another.
Happy hunting Folks
-Tink in Texas
TagYerIt
wrote on June 24 2009 @ 07:45 am: [report]
All of what you said is true and at least to my way of thinking, kind of common sense Tex. But there’s that elusive chemistry thing that I find to be lacking when one fills out a questionnaire with the answers they think their prospective date will want to hear, and usually has little or nothing to do with what stands before you when you finally meet. I’ll take my chances with face to face, at least for now. I like looking my future mistakes (OK maybe not, but I laugh thinking of it this way because I have a twisted sense of humor) straight in the eye. I can kind of gauge the chemistry thing in a chat, but really, you need to be able to kinda sniff each other, like big cats in the jungle or something…
jojo32
wrote on June 24 2009 @ 07:52 am: [report]
I did the whole “What are my best assets” thing when I first filled out my online profile(s). But then I thought, F that! I just wrote a couple of paragraphs about who I am, who I hate, why watching people chew annoys me, and things like that. I didnt want to try to reel someone in who would be interested in me only if I was ‘faking’. Just like in real life, you will be found out eventually.
I’ve gone on first dates with guys I met ‘in person’ where I sat there all ladylike and dabbed the corners of my mouth with the napkin and hated every minute of it. I also went on a really great first date where we drove thru “Wendy’s”, hogged down some fast food and then made out for 2 hours (ended up marrying that one. LOL). Any way you meet someone, you will know who they are at some point. Unless they are REALLY good fakers.
Agree w/ “Stef” - it’s ALL a risk. Take it or dont.
TexasRanchBuck
wrote on June 24 2009 @ 08:09 am: [report]
TAG:
You can get i visual on Match,Com eliminte the dogs lunch chicks…
Second you chat them up “online” and if you have that 6th sense you can detect wit,charm and warmth.
Then after you have check eachother out you meet at Starbuck.
But you are light years ahead of the other dudes and the blind dates. even tho I am short and bald I have a 80% second date percentage, second dates if I want one.
You are far better off than just meeting a lady at Starbucks or a bar.
Internet dating works!
Thanks Amigo
Tink
xanx
wrote on July 8 2009 @ 10:01 am: [report]
Excellent article, you’re right on.
I’m going to take down my profile on okcupid in a week—
I was wondering about all the same questions and came accross this article.
“Perhaps online dating sites accurately reflect a generation of singles so entitled to instant happiness and acceptance, we flock to digital artifices that both feed and coddle our egos.”—couldn’t be said better. And yes, “pick up artists” and “golddiggers”, etc.. People who don’t have guts to take a risk in person, fake romantic prospects, multi-player online games, etc. Online dating is just plain weird. I’m going to clubs a lot and it’s way better chance to meet someone who has common interests, such as likes the same music and likes to dance.
terybery
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 05:07 pm: [report]
I wish I was telepathic. You could have at least saved me some mula, minus the couple bucks for waffles. Have done the dating/bar scene, meet my friend of a friend, blind dates via my parents, and on-line dating. Guess what? I am still single. The final and lasting advice I could only give myself: It will happen if it is supposed to happen. Meanwhile, I am going to do the things I like to do and have some fun-reading endless articles on the internet about sex, relationships and learning new words to call my friends-doucheopotamus. Telepathic message:.........thanks for the laugh…........(I figured that telepathic messages should kind of look like morse code)
HDS1963
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 02:35 am: [report]
I don’t have a problem with online dating. I met my current girlfriend that way. I was very honest in my profile, describing myself exactly. The response was always positive, I had women who lived too far away just write to me saying how refreshing it was for a guy to be so honest.
My girlfriend contacted me because she had just come out of a traumatic relationship but still wanted a regular lover because she likes sex. That was nine months ago and we are very happy and in a relationship now. So out of nowhere we ended up getting loved up. This was through a UK based dating site.
My experience on Ok Cupid however was awful. In the UK it seems to attract women who are so up themselves they are almost circular; the kind of women who think listing a series of left-field authors they claim to have read is going to make them look more attractive. It doesn’t. The number of “normal” women on that site in the UK was very small, with very few having a sense of either fun or humour.
The best thing about internet dating is meeting women from outside your social circle, so you can keep your private life relatively private.
But I cannot state enough how important it is for guys to be honest in their profiles. Women can spot BS at a thousand paces…
Ozymandias
wrote on November 3 2009 @ 10:57 pm: [report]
Please. The only way I’ll ever date is if it’s not a prerequisite to surgically remove the PDA from my freakishly strong kung-fu grip. One day we can mate via the internet and humanity will finally have realized its full capacity for laziness.