Mind Of Man: Gentlemen Prefer Redheads
Posted by: John DeVore
Filed in:
guys
11:00AM, Wednesday August 12th 2009
A reader wrote in asking me why most men are “fascinated” with redheads. In this instance, I think “fascinated” is a nice way of saying “obsessed.” She admitted to being a redhead, and, therefore, the object of such ardor. She’s asked these men why they are so drawn to the crimson-haired, and the best she ever got out of them was “Redheads iz just hawt, yo!” This is true, but it is not the whole truth.
I wouldn’t say most men love redheads. A sizable majority, sure. And those men who love redheads likely focus on them because of their genetic rarity. The universe makes only so many redheads, and so it makes an impression when a man is beauty-napalmed by one. I have had a lifelong attraction to redheads: their alabaster skin, constellations of freckles, and combustible temperaments. This is an aberrant preoccupation.
Hair color is neither a dealmaker nor dealbreaker. I’ve probably dated 50 percent brunettes, 50 percent blonds. I love both, and I’ve never encountered the usual stereotypes affixed to their hair tones. The blonds I’ve dated have never been stupid or vapid. In fact, many have been bookish and wickedly funny. Likewise, my brunette girlfriends have defied the standard definitions. In my experience, blonds don’t have any more fun than brunettes. The women who have the most fun are those women who give themselves permission to have fun.
So, how do I explain a personal craving for flame brains? I could blame biology, how it makes a certain evolutionary logic that Man would pursue those women who, by virtue of a few mutated chromosomes, stand out from the crowd. I could be projecting my own prejudices and desires onto these women, as they are no feistier than any other person. I could be unforgivably superficial in this instance, drooling over a certain type of woman because she looks like a human red hot. But the real answer has more to do with my experience. I’ve never been able to date one. And I am John DeVore, Thunder Love God of Suspiciously Disingenuous Emo Dude Prose.
Every single she-ruby I’ve ever attempted to date has failed to acknowledge my existence, taken a flamethrower to my heart, or disappeared in the morning like a cinnamon mist. Maybe this is poetic justice, the price one pays for chasing someone based on a single physical attribute. There was the redhead in high school who used to make out with me after school in the woods. She tasted like bubblegum, glowed in the sun, and dated every boy except for me. I was utterly in love with a little redhead in college who seemed to shoot sparks out of her mouth every time she talked about her passions, from art to politics to music. I finally got a chance to kiss the sprite after years of mooning over her, sending her poems, talking late into the night about her favorite topics, which included the occult, Northern Irish politics, and “Why All The Boys Who Aren’t You Be Crazy?” We were at an Irish pub where laddies from “back home” were pounding pints. She and I were a little drunk, and I kissed her at the bar, and the seven-foot-tall leprechaun with a hook instead of a left hand took offense to my putting my mitts on such a bonny lass. I deceive you not: bro had a hook. A hook! I’m happy that I managed to get her into a cab, and get me far away, before the local IRA chapter took a shillelagh to my Texas noggin.
I spent an entire weekend with a redhead whose milky back was a riot of freckles. We did things that still make me sweat. Of course, there was no third day of hot jungle love, nor any subsequent day thereafter, because she informed me with the emotional detachment of a Vulcan that she was “just exploring” her options. I won’t judge a whole group of people by three examples. Clearly, my minor fetish somehow sabotaged any success I might have had with them. I accept responsibility.
I’m pretty sure a taste for the gingers is solely a guy thing. I’ve not known many women who are mad, mad, mad for dudes with licorice red locks. One female friend of mine calls them “living corpses.” So, maybe women will never understand why men like me are infatuated with scarlet bangs. I mean, redheads aren’t magical creatures, like unicorns. They are human beings, like you and me. Still, Christina Hendricks, if you’re reading this, send me a message through this website.
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Riley
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:07 am: [report]
Natural redheads. Not emo red hair with jet black eyebrows.
skywalk
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:11 am: [report]
Hey we may feel more pain, but we are hot so I’ll take it!
redheads not warheads
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:18 am: [report]
Of course this Ginger agrees.
Rose
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:21 am: [report]
Well, I’m a woman and I love male redheads (I think female redheads look great, too, I just don’t swing that way). Had the crush of a lifetime on a strawberry blonde friend of my brother, with his gray eyes and wide shoulders and super-cute freckles…..mmmmm.
M_A_C
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:25 am: [report]
Do red head men even exist? I mean, beyond Bonaduce (who used to live next door to ex, btw, in Los Feliz). I’ve maybe seen 2 in my whole life (including Danny shirtless every time I went out there).
CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:26 am: [report]
I own a shillelagh, and I like redheads.
skywalk
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:29 am: [report]
I know tons of red head men, it may just be where you live? Portland, Maine has their fair share!! I’ve only seen a couple of cute male red heads though, I’m attracted to dark completed men, at least that what I seem to date.
H. Blue
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:41 am: [report]
Christina Hendricks is a natural blonde.
writergirl
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:42 am: [report]
There is something mysterious about red heads. I always wanted to be one, but could never get the color just right. So blond I am.
FrzKey
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:42 am: [report]
I had to create an account to inform you - Hell Yeah women like redheads too! I just find far fewer hot redheaded males around to pursue. Now if Seth Green would ever just come back to Philly…
skywalk
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:47 am: [report]
My husband said he was never into red heads until he met me, now he checks them out all the time! I have strawberry blond hair and when I put blond highlights in my hair became it too blond and my husband hated it. He was like a started dating a red head and now I’m married to a blond this s*cks. So I let it all grow out and am sticking with my red hair. The only thing is as you get older your hair typically gets darker and in some redheads it turns brown!
DancerNinja
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:05 am: [report]
Being a redhead sucked when you are young and wanted to fit in, but I’m pretty happy with my genetic lottery win now.
And my brother was lucky enough to be brunette, though his beard comes in auburn.
Downside: I have to wear mascara and eyebrow coloring every day so I have facial features. Poop.
silvergurl
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:07 am: [report]
your writing makes me drool! gosh, i heart you, john devore. and i happen to like male redheads—although not all of them….
SomeGuy84
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:16 am: [report]
This is actually the first I’ve heard of this redhead infatuation men have. I am not especially crazy about redheads nor can I ever recall any of my friends having talked about especially liking redheads.
Brunettes are the ones that give me butterflies.
Then again, maybe there just aren’t that many around where I live.
MissMissy
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:23 am: [report]
I’m an inner redhead. I dyed for about 15 years until I saw everyone woman on the planet with my color red. I went back to my dark brown, but am so much happier as my inner redhead. Everyone says I come alive as a ginger.
AND .. I have a GREAT affinity toward male redheads. It all started with Richie Cunningham - I have no logical explanation, I just thought he was adorable. And now, Eric Stoltz… humina! I even have a date with a 6’5” redhead tomorrow - HOT DAWG!
shamrockin
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:25 am: [report]
A human red-hot! HA!
I am a natural redhead, and I went through some awful stuff for being ginger-haired in elementary school. It’s funny now how the same guys back then gave me all kinds of hell, but now want to check to see if the carpet matches the drapes…
Actually, I did fancy a fellow redhead back in the day. He was kind and always stuck up for me. I asked him to be my “steady” freshman year of high school, and was denied. That really stunk.
skywalk
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:27 am: [report]
I think one reason I don’t like male red heads is because when I was a kid there was a neighbor of mine that had red hair and some people would sing that K I S S I N G up in a tree song. I was like what are you crazy he’s ugly and I just don’t get it the only reason we should be together is because have red hair!
skywalk
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:29 am: [report]
Maybe being a red head and being teased when we were younger made us better as adults? It WAS tough being a red head.
shamrockin
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:36 am: [report]
Skywalk, I thing you may be right. I’m always quick to defend children who are getting picked on, rather than just ignore it. Childhood was hard, and kids are so mean.
Shasta
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:49 am: [report]
The red-hair thing just doesn’t work for men.
They come off as albino instead of albaster. As kids they’re cute but somehow it becomes arrested development. It’s impossible to take them seriously, and I think most have a horrible complex because of it.
Unless you can parlay it into a movie career - Ron Howard Seth Rogen (he’s really a red-head?)
pinkjellyfish
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 12:11 pm: [report]
Bobby Flay is one redhead I’d love to have any day of the week, and then he can make me a burger.
bogart4017
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 12:12 pm: [report]
I was always scared of redheads. You know how youth comes with irrational fears. Now i have a healthy respect for them. I know if i was a redhead i’d resent it if i were called “red” like all the other redheads i know.
skywalk
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 12:16 pm: [report]
@pinkjellyfish: You got that right!
phlebotnum
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 12:20 pm: [report]
So…should I be happy to be unusual or wary of being fetishized? It’s strange being a natural redhead, because I always get two different vibes that are hard to distinguish. One is definitely the creepy fetishized catcalling (hey, red, where you going?). The other is the more low key but still strange vibe of feeling like the guy you’re flirting with assumes you’ll be way more sexually, um, “adventurous” and he hints as much when you first meet.
But then again, my current boyfriend love my long ginger (well, more copper) hair but doesn’t give fetish vibes off at all.
theattack
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 12:25 pm: [report]
I wish I had auburn hair so bad, but instead I have my medium tone brunette hair. I would never dye my hair though, because I prefer my body to be mostly natural (no tattoos or dyes or perms, but I’ll keep shaving). The thought of having auburn hair makes me want to break my own rules though. Such a gorgeous color!
Antiquity
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 01:21 pm: [report]
This redhead would date you John Devore.
lol. I love your writing.
@skywalk I think you are right. It must be a regional thing because I have rarely seen a redheaded guy in Indiana but when I travel to Chicago I usually see quite a few. -shrugs- Maybe there should be a study done on that. lol.
Radix
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 01:33 pm: [report]
I’ve been reading your stuff for a while & just wanted to say how much I enjoy it—thanks for the great posts :D
& making me look busy @ work
Netty
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 01:36 pm: [report]
Ew. Ew at all of the comment flirting to John DeVore.
marchimark
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 01:36 pm: [report]
I’m a natural blonde, but I’ve been dying my hair red for a few years now. Um.. for me, life as a redheads is much more fun. I don’t mind being called “Red” or “Ginger”.. My hair is a great ice breaker, actually. I’m freer to be myself and not apologize for it. I’m sassy instead of bitchy, passionate instead of obstinate, and Irish instead of drunk. I’m charming! I love it!!
Radix
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 01:43 pm: [report]
Hmm.. no flirtation here. Just liked the post.
GreenAura
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 01:47 pm: [report]
My mom is a natural red and although I love her, I really try to be nothing like her. She’s ditzy, bitchy, unhealthy, she’s a follower, she exaggerates everything, she’s lazy, spoiled, talks in baby talk around her parents and doesn’t work (even though there is nothing preventing her from working, she just doesn’t want to). So she completely destroyed my view of natural reds. Sorry Gingers, but I can’t help but equate you to my mom! Horrible, I know. Oh but there is an exception… Isla Fisher. My word, I have such a girl crush on her!!
skywalk
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 01:49 pm: [report]
That is how I am with names, if someone I don’t like has a unique name I never like that name again or vice versa. Seem juvenile, but true.
jennifer24
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 01:53 pm: [report]
I use to hate my red head and freckles when I was a kid.
Now it makes me stand out and I LOVE it
CadenO
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 02:31 pm: [report]
I never found red-headed men attractive. The corpse-skin and creepy light blue eyes would have me reaching for my holy artifacts and flame-thrower…
However, the other day I was You-Tubing and watched a whole bunch of Danny Elfman/Oingo Boingo videos. Holy moly, I almost burst into flames! Most of them were from when he was in his early & mid-30’s, back in the mid 1980s or so. He’s definitely an exception, and even today in his 50’s he’s got it going on.
Seth Green is another red cutie. But generally, the guys just don’t look so hot when they’re red (especially when they get older), but many of the women look great.
Nikki Dowling
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 02:41 pm: [report]
YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!
anoldguy
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 02:41 pm: [report]
What’s not to like about redheaded girls? Cute-as-a-button at 4, eyebrow-canting thoughtful skeptic at 16, hottie at 24, gorgeous at 40 and beyond. Some (not all, but certainly some) of the smartest, funniest, sexiest women I’ve known have been redheads.
Can I explain the attraction? Not a bit. I just enjoy it.
LostInStars
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 03:03 pm: [report]
I dated a ginger dude for several years, I loved his hair, his freckles, his stunning green eyes. Meeeooow. And as I swing both ways, ginger ladies are especially gorgeous to me. /sigh
And I’m a ginger too, hey! Ginger mania! Haha.
sklut
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 03:29 pm: [report]
“Your beauty is beyond compare, With flaming locks of auburn hair, With ivory skin and eyes of emerald green”
Need I say more? Dolly Parton is right on the money with ‘Jolene’. As a natural ginger I prefer ginger men as well because I want cute little red headed babies some day.
elisem76
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 04:05 pm: [report]
How funny…I recently explained to my husband that I began dying my naturally auburn hair way redder as soon as my mom let me in high school due to my childhood obsession with Nancy Drew. I told him that once I hit college, and had experimented with requisite black-as-tar goth-girl ‘do for awhile, I went back to red because of Agent Scully on The X-Files and the fact that people told me I was a dead-ringer for her with the red hair. And now, I’m still a red-head, cause, well, it rocks.
*sam*
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 04:33 pm: [report]
I think ginger guys are hot
seth green is a total cutie, but, I prefer the big, Irish types… you know, with the full beard… there was one in my high school, and to this day, I still think he’s one of the hottest guys I’ve ever seen in person… *drools*
though, I’ve never dated one or really even befriended one. just ogled from afar… :/
H. Blue
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 05:36 pm: [report]
whatever happened to drooling after blondes? it seems most men prefer brunettes.. (or gingers) sad…
tattooed_redhead
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 08:45 pm: [report]
Echoing the other redhead comments - hated it sooooo much when I was a kid! But I had a pretty good comeback for the taunt ‘carrot top’ - ‘carrot tops are *green*, stupid!’. That usually shut them up pretty fast.
But now? *Love* my red hair (sometimes I even dye it redder than it is!) and I even don’t mind my freckles.
My ex husband tried over and over again to explain the fascination that a lot of men have for redhead. I never understood it. But now, I don’t know, maybe because I’m older and I’m more comfortable with my sexuality, I get it. I see that some men see us as more exciting and mysterious, and I run with it!
dahveed
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 09:17 pm: [report]
Damn, we’re pretty shallow to sort women into groups based on hair color - a trait that about 1/2 the women in the US change or alter through dying. I’ve dated women who changed their hair color during the relationship and it didn’t seem to change who they were.
For me, good looking women come in every hair color and style, well except bald (as I type this I realize that Natalie Portman was shaved in the movie “V” and she was still good looking, so I take back that bald statement).
Laurel
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 10:24 pm: [report]
The guy I dated all through high school had a thing for redheads, so I dyed my hair red (naturally lightish brown) for years. I feel like I got more attention from men when my hair was red than I do now, when my hair is its natural color. I know I’m the same person inside, and I act the same, so all I can contribute it to is the hair color. I think it’s totally bs. A woman is who she is, regardless of the color (or style) of her hair.
_jsw_
wrote on August 12 2009 @ 11:17 pm: [report]
I’ve dated a fair number of redheads. Well… OK, one. But she was quite amazing in many ways and was, among other things, one of the best kissers I’ve known. However, the fact that she was a redhead, although awesome, had nothing to do with how amazing she was. It was a cool perk, that’s all.
I dig redheads, yes, but not exclusively.
onewriter
wrote on August 13 2009 @ 12:03 am: [report]
Reds are awesome…and the temper thing is bs. My dad, My ex and My son are all reds and ALL would be even tempered if my ex didnt’ have issues relating to his childhood. Fiesty? never. I’ve got red highlights, not full red, but I’ve got plenty of drive and spirit. It all depends on the person.
Hello Kitty
wrote on August 13 2009 @ 06:13 am: [report]
I am a natural redhead, unfortunatelly, my whole life from about 14 to 20 I’ve been dying my hair blonde due to my inner hate for having red hair. Now, that I’ve let my hair grow out naturally for the past few years I am astounded at how much more attention I get in comparison to being blonde. There are men on the street that would just come and compliment me, and I agree I think redhead are definitely the unicorn of the female world, men only want them because they are so rare and can’t easily have them… in my opinion.
toxicstar
wrote on August 13 2009 @ 09:52 am: [report]
I love red-haired men and have had numerous crushes on them throughout my life thus far. There’s some fire and sensitivity there that other men I’ve dated just haven’t matched yet. I really resent the people that think they have “corpse-skin”, really? Come on people. A tall red-haired man with broad shoulders and a strong jaw is HOT.
DancerNinja
wrote on August 13 2009 @ 11:42 am: [report]
I don’t think I get any more attention from men than the next lady, but then again, I’ve never had another hair color to compare.
fullapple
wrote on August 13 2009 @ 04:52 pm: [report]
I have an obsession with red-headed men. I admit it. It’s not that silly stereotype about passionate red-heads. If anything, most red-headed men I have found myself entangled with tend to be of the shy, temperate variety.
I cannot help myself from crushing on a shy, geeky, red-headed boy.
And a cute red-headed girl can always turn my head. And then there’s Christina Hendricks. I’d go…hop the fence for her.
gingerlove
wrote on August 13 2009 @ 08:12 pm: [report]
My screenname should speak for itself. I’ve dealt with redheads my whole life. My mother, my oldest sister, myself (more strawberry than red), my daughter, my dog and the love of my life. Red headed men? Don’t know about all but wouldn’t trade the one I have for tall dark anything!
George
wrote on August 13 2009 @ 11:13 pm: [report]
Personally, I think it’s more the fair skin that goes with natural blondness or redness and the freckles that so often are found on the latter. Hair color is not important; it’s the complexion that usually goes with it.
Ellis
wrote on August 13 2009 @ 11:22 pm: [report]
Just saying, red-headed men? They are pretty awesome. I have the impression that they’re either a bit gangly and given to easily looking nerdy, or are all bearded and cuddly. Perhaps not everyone’s cup of tea, but it’s not as if they’re without fans.
Daddy-O
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 03:37 am: [report]
I just had to scroll back to the top of the article to make sure I didn’t write it. I always seem to end up with blondes even thought all my friends & family know I adore redheads, yet have never gone out with one. It is a running joke in my family whenever they meet the new girl…they always say they’ll know it’s the one I’m going to marry when I bring home the redhead. They may be on to something!
skywalk
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 05:08 am: [report]
As I said in Maine we have more than our fair share of red-headed men and now I’m actually taking the time and checking them out and I saw the best looking red-head that I’ve ever seen last night. But I still think its harder for some of them to pull it off. But now that I’m looking I’m liking what I’m seeing. I guess us female red-heads don’t have it all wrapped up!
majicksand
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 01:35 pm: [report]
I love being a red-head. Green-eyed, Irish descent… all of it. My husband loves it too. I gave my kids animal “alter-egos” when they were little, and my husband had one when I met him. I didn’t have one, so I asked my husband what he thought I should be. He didn’t even need to think about it. He just said “rabbit”. I didn’t get it. “Well, Jessica Rabbit, of course,” he explained as he smiled and raised a sultry eyebrow.
I’m thinking about getting a red sequinned dress for New Year’s. hehe!
Daddy-O
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 01:50 pm: [report]
@majicksand - Oh, NO fair…now you’re just teasing us!!
majicksand
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 02:11 pm: [report]
Nope, not at all, Daddy-O. No teasing involved. I assure you that my husband will be allowed to appreciate the dress from the floor at the foot of our bed by the end of the night. Oh, sorry, was that TMI?
I really, really enjoy being a red-head. I have a great time trying to prove the stereotype!
Daddy-O
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 02:25 pm: [report]
Oh MS…you are killing me here. Not TMI, I just don’t know how much more I can handle. I may literally die here at my desk.
As for proving the stereotype, I would say mission accomplished.
How did your husband get so lucky???
majicksand
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 02:46 pm: [report]
@Daddy-O: My husband and I disagree on this point. He says he’s lucky, but I think I’m the lucky one. After all, part of the stereotype is the hot-temper! I found a man who takes my occasional bouts of insanity in stride. I guess he figures it’s the trade off for my “wild” side.
Daddy-O
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 02:53 pm: [report]
Isn’t that the definition of a great relationship, when both sides feel they’re the lucky one? If not, it should be.
Sounds like a hell of a deal to me.
majicksand
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 03:15 pm: [report]
I totally agree. *goofy grin*
I asked my husband what the fascination is. He said there’s a mystique about natural redheads that other women don’t have. According to him, it cannot be achieved with dye. He says redheads are confident and in-charge yet playful. He loves the passionate side even though it sometimes turns explosive.
Whatever. I’m just glad I found such a great guy to put up with me.
Daddy-O
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 03:23 pm: [report]
Your husband clearly gets it, as does the author. I don’t know if I could even describe it, but I’ve had it for as long as I have been interested in girls, and I’m pretty sure it’s not going anywhere!
You two sound like you make a great couple…congrats and enjoy! You wouldn’t happen to have any single sisters late 20’s to early 30’s, would you?
majicksand
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 03:34 pm: [report]
Thanks. I actually do have a sister, and she’s 34. She’s a brunette though. Sorry :(
Daddy-O
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 04:27 pm: [report]
Some girls have all the luck…
George
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 04:42 pm: [report]
Hah! I would say some GUYS have all the luck.
CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 06:17 pm: [report]
I like redheads, let me count the ways:
Riley Shy, Ashley Haze, Beaue Marie, Dani Jensen, Flick Shagwell, Marie McCray, Molly Rome, Scarlett Pain, Tobi Pacific, Tommie Ryden, Trinity Post….
Rose4
wrote on August 14 2009 @ 06:50 pm: [report]
To Arnoldguy—you made my evening when you said that redheads over 40 are gorgeous. I’m 45 & worrying that my looks are fading, but you just cheered me up. Thank you!
painted_lady
wrote on August 17 2009 @ 02:04 am: [report]
@Rose4,
My mother is a natural redhead, 55 and beautiful as she’s ever been. She’s aging gracefully, and she says when her hair color fades to gray (it’s more of a dark strawberry blond now where it used to be deep auburn) she’s going to find the most ridiculously bright shade of fake red she can just to be outrageous, which I think is part of what’s making her age so wonderfully. She’s never stopped having fun!
No worries that your looks are fading, darling: you may, relatively speaking, grow old, but if you’re anything like my mother, just refuse to grow up!
SDH
wrote on August 17 2009 @ 02:09 pm: [report]
Hot red-headed guys do exist, they’re just rarely as hot. But sure, they exist. Two words: Eric Stoltz.
veronicainla
wrote on August 17 2009 @ 06:16 pm: [report]
I love redheaded guys. Not like the weird orange or strawberry blonde, but firey red or auburn? Mmmm…
nezume
wrote on August 18 2009 @ 09:11 pm: [report]
Red heads are the best! Totally got picked on in elementary. Anne of Green Gables was my hero and salvation! Hated it with a passion and my mom never let me dye my hair. Now I love it, but yes, definitely 2 schools of though that we get, the creepers that just love redheads to varying degrees, and the guys who love us for who we are (and various extra perks!)
nezume
wrote on August 19 2009 @ 12:59 am: [report]
Oh, and no matter how creative you think you are, calling me “red” isn’t. It only reminds me of a certain attorney I once dated who also liked to call me “tigre”.
reddeb
wrote on August 24 2009 @ 12:56 am: [report]
I have near waist length aurburn hair. I must say, even at a very early age when children would tease me I knew they would all one day be envious. I was indeed a creative little tyke. As a preschooler/young elementary student I would respond to the standard, “Why is your hair that color?” with: 1. I stole it from a Nun, she wasn’t really using it, keeping it hidden like that. 2. I left it out in the rain and it rusted. 3. I am actually a Viking.
I have an ex-boyfriend that is a ginger as well and I’d have to say the chemistry was pretty hot. I do think that as young children redheads are treated so differently, by adults that usually find us adorable, by other children that see this and can be jealous or cruel, that we do grow up to have personality traits in common. While I am not so comfortable being the focus of someone’s fetish I do understand someone generalizing and saying they find redheads exciting or fun because I do think it is possible we share more in common than just coloring.
gingerlover
wrote on August 26 2009 @ 09:02 pm: [report]
GINGERS ARE ADORABLE..
I´M A BRUNETTE AND SIMPLY DIE FOR THEM…
I FIND THEM IRRESISTIBLE…
_jsw_
wrote on August 26 2009 @ 09:05 pm: [report]
@ gingerlover: Welcome to The Frisky! You might want to try clicking that pesky “caps lock” key until the little light goes off. Just a suggestion.
onewriter
wrote on August 26 2009 @ 10:31 pm: [report]
hahahaha!!!
Orangetang
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 02:34 pm: [report]
Good god! There are women who think we red-headed men are attractive? Are you insane? Please crazy ladies, contact me. I can use the self-esteem boost. Since I was prepubescent, society has been telling me that I am somehow subhuman, not even mammalian, a carrot-top, a freckle-faced strawberry, if you will.
And @gingerlover, please ignore _jsw_ and feel free to keep your cap locks on. The intesity of your positive regard is greatly appreciated.
gingerlover
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 05:15 pm: [report]
@ orangetang LOL… completely ignored JSW.. I DON´T MIND SCREAMING TO THE WORLD THAT THE GINGERS ARE THE CUTEST GUYS EVER…
I´m a proud ginger lover!!!!
And no, i´m not insane… and i have lots of mates that find gingers cute.. haha u should check the pages of gingers in fb, i am like part of all of them, and defend them with my life… haha also check NARHP, i also fight in that one a looot!!!
lol
GO GINGERS… CUTE AND ADORABLE GINGERS!!!
I WANNA MARRY A GINGER!!!
Anaxa
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 08:02 pm: [report]
Honey, we like gingers, too. Reds make me a little feisty ;D
amylouod
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 06:19 pm: [report]
1- i love the red headed men… oh, so much.
2- stop calling us gingers, jerkstore.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Red_hair#Gingerism_.28prejudice.2Fdiscrimination_towards_redheads.29
lothius
wrote on September 15 2009 @ 09:31 am: [report]
I’m 43 and have dated several redheads and almost married one, sort of. I am one of the numerous men captivated by redheads. Even now 20 years later I’m still hot for them. I married a dishwater blond and its OK, but she’ not a redhead. For me redheads are different. Besides their looks, they act according to the upbringing and as red heads they’ve been treated differently than other girls and they act accordingly.
For me the attraction is purely aesthetic. I love the red contrasting against the pale skin and I love freckles on anyone. So again we’re talking attraction to contrast. I’m partial to redheads with green eyes. THe eyes pop and the red pops and the freckles pop and so doses their skin. I love them the way I love my favorite food or ice cream flavor, my favorite colors such.
All in all, I have found that sexually they tend to be more adventurous and are also more confident. I think that being red makes them have to be different and I’m attracted to that too. So I would guess that maybe we are all attracted to them because they are different and not the same ‘ol crackers.
titianblonde
wrote on September 16 2009 @ 12:57 am: [report]
While this article accurately describes the engrossment of some men with redheads, I dispute Mr. Devores’ conclusion that “...a taste for the gingers is solely a guy thing…women will never understand why men like me are infatuated with scarlet women…And those men who love redheads likely focus on them because of their genetic rarity. The universe makes only so many redheads, and so it makes an impression when a man is beauty-napalmed by one.”
Has the author inadvertently exposed his prejudice against the open and dramatic cultural shift in the sexual mores of western women? Does Mr. Devore intend to suggest that women are incapable of appreciating the unusual and captivating beauty of a sub-species of their own sex?
I propose that Mr. Devore suffers from a lack of perception due to his “...lifelong attraction to redheads: their alabaster skin, constellations of freckles, and combustible temperaments. This is an aberrant preoccupation.”
Why is an preoccupation with Redheads aberrant? I suggest that such a fascination indicates a taste for the incomparable and demonstrates a connoisseurship of the palate of female pulchritude.
I am a Redhead - my shade is referred to as ‘Titian Blonde’... I proudly toss 4 feet of never-dyed tresses combining every shade of auburn, red and blonde streaks and highlights. Prone to spontaneously combustion, I have no freckles, naturally dark eyebrows, blue eyes, my draperies match the carpet, and indeed, I glow in the sun.
More to the point, I emphatically disprove the authors’ contention that such a preference is a purely male phenom.
I casually dismissed lesbian advances for more than 40 years. The woman who successfully completed a pass at me was a 5’10 Strawberry Blonde with pink alabaster skin covered with freckles. She irrevocably altered the way I look at all women and inspired my own aberrant preoccupation with Redheads.
Having been overwhelmed by a Redhead, I dispute Mr. Devores’ assertion that they are not supernaturally enchanting. “...redheads aren’t magical creatures, like unicorns. They are human beings, like you and me.”
Nonsense. My Strawberry Blonde wore a silken thong strung with pearls as pink as her peaks; her beauty was novel and transformative - and her magic remains as rare and precious as any unicorn.
I would never have recognized the power and joy of my own mutated chromosomes without a Redhead to entice and bewitch me.
reddeb
wrote on September 16 2009 @ 01:25 am: [report]
@lothius
Although nothing chases me away faster than a man telling of his life long obsession with redheads I do agree with much of what you have said. I think it’s true that we have been treated so differently since childhood, whether it was harassed or admiration and that treatment likely helped cultivate our personalities. I also wonder if similar to the super hot models who say men never ask them out if we become more confident and bolder with men because by a certain age we realize that while men are attracted they are often intimidated by our looks/rarity. I do think I am more adventurous sexually, I don’t know that many other natural redheads to know if that is a common trait.
@titianblonde
Oddly, I have actually been told I was as a unicorn twice in the last month, so yes, I would agree with you as well. =)
effing hickster
wrote on September 16 2009 @ 01:56 am: [report]
You can’t deny the beauty of gingers like Amy Adams or Nicole Kidman (is Claire Danes a ginger or a blonde?), I still prefer women with a little deeper red, sometimes treading into auburn territory. Maybe because I prefer brown or green eyes to blue.
For me, it’s women like Isla Fisher, or Kate Mara—so beautiful.
titianblonde
wrote on September 16 2009 @ 03:08 am: [report]
I was well into my 40’s before understanding the power of Being a Redhead.
Always frustrated by the attention my hair garnered, I never understood the essential and fundamental connection between my hair and my Self…and certainly never acknowledged the potential for devastation a Redhead creates for those who are compelled to pursue. As my lovers swirled around me, I had no ability to manage the havoc.
Regrets being pointless, I have learned to embrace this wonderful difference and revel in the freedom of Being a Redhead - a combustible, glowing, righteously crazy Redhead. It is the most fun I can imagine; it is Who I Am.
Just this year I began to wear a tiny, sterling unicorn charm given when I was 19. The charm is always noticed by those susceptible to the mystique of Redheads.
lothius
wrote on September 16 2009 @ 08:13 am: [report]
@reddeb : My family has at least 6 reds, male and female, so intimidation never comes into play for me any more than it would have with any other hue. My preoccupation with redheads isn’t life altering other than falling madly in love with two of them back to back and then when the second one and I broke up and ended up back with the first only to see it blow up a few months later. I’m taken with imagery of them that is stuck in my mind. Reds stand out in a crowd and I’m an attention seeker. I stand out too because I’m a bit goofy and tend to perform in public, so red matches my personality. I think author is from the old school of male intellect of objectifying females as less. No doubt that my experiences with redheads color me more than those men who haven’t, and I think that gives me a little insight, though not that much. My experiences with them where great and even when it was bad, it was better than with average women. I wouldn’t trade my wife, but if I were single again, I would look for a redhead because I KNOW that I will at least have an interesting life and get to look at great beauty each day.
titianblonde
wrote on September 18 2009 @ 10:23 pm: [report]
@reddeb: What I am impressed with on this blog is the understanding that for the Lover of Redheads, sexual orientation is immaterial. Wonder why the author hasn’t picked up on that?
Fun and entertaining book on Redheads: http://marionroach.com/
Ongoing blog on the subject: http://thesisterproject.com/roach/calling-all-red-headed-sisters/#more-388
Great T-Shirts for the genetically mutated beauty:
http://realmofredheads.com/store/index.php/action/item/id/345/prevaction/item/previd/39/prevstart//
lothius
wrote on September 18 2009 @ 10:30 pm: [report]
titianblonde - The Author isn’t into Redheads, he’s into himself. How can he pick up on something he doesn’t understand.
titianblonde
wrote on September 18 2009 @ 10:33 pm: [report]
@lothius: It is, I suppose, too much to hope that the man would stick to topics about which he knows something…anything, really.
lothius
wrote on September 18 2009 @ 10:38 pm: [report]
@titianblonde LOL… Maybe he’ll write an article about how men picked up women in the 50’s…
titianblonde
wrote on September 18 2009 @ 11:10 pm: [report]
@lothius: OUCH. Or maybe he’ll continue to focus on his interpersonal failures…clearly, the man is not up for the paradigmatic shift necessary to endure, much less enjoy, a Redhead.
onewriter
wrote on September 18 2009 @ 11:17 pm: [report]
you guys are all starting to sound like immature locker room kids trying to strut what little they have….or is that it? You are feeling insecure because someone can talk about stuff-even if it doesn’t make them look good, and laugh about it, and invite laughter. hm…maybe you all don’t belong on this site. go make your own where you can bash people all you want and falsly inflate your egos. we don’t need your kind of crap here
titianblonde
wrote on September 18 2009 @ 11:48 pm: [report]
@onewriter: as opposed to, say…scolding strangers?
Your personal desire and need for crap, here or elsewhere, is not germane. Further, inferring a plurality of individuals with no need of my kind of crap is presumptuous.
Op Ed in the Public Domain, particularly within the Blogosphere, is intrinsically an invitation to engage.
Redheads - inherently incendiary, irreverent, ineffably impossible and incredibly illuminating.
What color be your tresses?
CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 12:26 am: [report]
Redheads are purty. Freckly is nice too.
Or just dump me in a kiddy pool with a bar of Irish Spring and I’ll be happy.
majicksand
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 08:21 am: [report]
@titanblonde: I am a natural red, and I love John DeVore’s articles. Now what?
onewriter
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 08:29 am: [report]
@titanblonde what? you’re sooooo knowledgeable and yet you can’t guess what color of hair I have? Leave the site if you don’t like it. There was nothing wrong with his article on red heads. Your attitude sucks. Go start a site with lothius…you and your loathsome friend can bash anyone you want. And we won’t be subjected to it.
titianblonde
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 08:58 am: [report]
@onewriter:
By any chance, do you Bass fish? Angling is an acquired skill, if you do not.
This was poor sport - not much craft required; you vaccummed up that hook. As it has been ridiculously easy to land you, I will not rate you a citation catch.
@majicksand:
Now What? Now we sit back and watch @onewriter flop around on the shoals of indignation…coughing up his hook.
NOW, it’s fun.
titianblonde
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 09:13 am: [report]
...red highlights.
onewriter
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 09:27 am: [report]
you’re weird…and yes, I’ve got red hair
titianblonde
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 09:36 am: [report]
@onewriter:
Why, yes I am…thus illustrating the central thesis of Mr. Devore’s increasingly fruitful and entertaining article.
With all such respect due, you previously wrote: ‘I’ve got red highlights, not full red, but I’ve got plenty of drive and spirit. It all depends on the person.’
onewriter
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 10:12 am: [report]
good memory. I’m not a flaming red like my son. But I like my red. I just hope he or his kids have kids with a red to keep the gene alive
majicksand
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 10:26 am: [report]
Red hair is not a requirement or an excuse to be a bitch.
onewriter
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 10:30 am: [report]
neither is being a woman a requirement.
majicksand
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 10:33 am: [report]
My comment wasn’t directed at you, onewriter.
titianblonde
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 12:13 pm: [report]
Is foul language allowed on this site?
Such a threadbare rubric. As it happens, I am surfeit with a choice melange of pejorative aspersions…please, allow me:
Harridan, vituperator, termagant, hag, battle ax, calumniator, old cow, shrew, ...
http://beatsentropy.com/2007/04/05/bitch-etymology-and-select-typologies/
Type 4: Bad Ass Bitches
Best described in the August 2006 Beats Entropy post of the same name,
bad ass bitches are the elite of their gender.
They are as Jack Sparrow is to pirates, as shotguns are to zombie hunters, as mint-chocolate-sex-lube is to all other lubricants.
Simply put they are best of the best, who remind us that contrary thousands of years of misogyny, paternalism and patriarchy – the human spirit cannot be contained or limited by invasive categorizations of masculine and feminine.
Coarse haste and hyperbole indicate an appalling paucity of humor.
Now, insult me properly.
majicksand
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 12:49 pm: [report]
“Big” words lose all value when they are used expressly to lend the appearance of intelligence.
titianblonde
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 01:10 pm: [report]
So, no slur?
majicksand
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 01:20 pm: [report]
Thank you for proving my point.
_jsw_
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 01:54 pm: [report]
Ah, titianblonde, it’s so nice to see you on the site. I’m sure your perceptive intellect will be welcomed here, evidenced by your continued referral to onewriter as a man when her first comment clearly indicated her gender. I’m happy that I can refer to her comment here, because I’d hate for you to have to venture beyond this one article and look elsewhere on the site to gain some sort of perspective before you begin insulting your fellow members.
If you’d like to be considered a “bad ass bitch”, you’re going to have to do better.
*sam*
wrote on September 19 2009 @ 04:11 pm: [report]
aww, did I miss the party?? D*mn. Better luck next time I suppose. *sigh*
sexcandyfireflies87
wrote on September 20 2009 @ 04:49 pm: [report]
I’m not full on fledge red head, but I was born with natural red highlights. I was born a blonde who later turned borderline brunette, yet still retained her redhead highlights. I dye my hair blonde now, but its always had that hint of strawberry blonde in my hair. I once did go and dye it red, actually a few different shades everytime I did a touch up, but people would tell me left and right now beautifully natural I looked with red hair. I loved it but after a year and half of being red i ended up being blonde again. I did have one ex boyfriend that hated red heads. He told me it was because of a girl he liked when he was very young was mean to him and called him this horrible names that from then on he hated red heads. He told me to never be one again. Good thing I’m not dating him anymore…
ChocoBoo
wrote on September 22 2009 @ 06:38 am: [report]
Bless ginger men! After becoming an unwitting slave to Josh Homme from QOTSA, I’ve been more into redheads than ever before. Josh Homme= hunka hunka burnin’love!
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_Oaaj59t126M/SYMf0NNrJmI/AAAAAAAAAVs/r38zTlAgEEM/s400/josh_homme.jpg
rokgdss4
wrote on October 29 2009 @ 06:32 pm: [report]
I have always had a thing for gingers, and now I finally got one of my own! There are lots of things that make him drool-worthy, but I think the redhead part is what made me notice him in the first place. I have also always had a desire to be one. Does that say something weird about me? Haha.