Levi Johnston Experiencing Penis-Size Crisis
Posted by: Susannah Breslin
Filed in:
celebs
8:30AM, Thursday November 5th 2009
Oh, no! Frisky favorite Levi Johnston is having some type of penis-related existential crisis prior to his upcoming nudie Playgirl pictorial. The New York Post reports that Levi is worried about the size of his pecker. “We hear that the father of Sarah Palin’s grandson has been telling folks at the magazine he is worried about how his manhood may look during the shoot.” What if he’s a grower, not a shower? What if when he takes it all off, he doesn’t measure up? The purported shoot location is, unsurprisingly, an ice rink (nice, er, puck?), and rumor has it Levi is worried the chill may cause some unflattering shrinkage. Levi’s man-friend Tank says it ain’t so, but perhaps an on-set fluffer would be in order? [New York Post]
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intuition
wrote on November 5 2009 @ 08:39 am: [report]
Or they could just photoshop his penis to Levi’s standards. Seems to be the running trend in photos and advertisments.
Perceptible
wrote on November 5 2009 @ 08:48 am: [report]
Hmmm… perhaps he should have thought of this before he signed on? intuition is right, they can just photoshop it!
EastCoastMale
wrote on November 5 2009 @ 09:12 am: [report]
If he needs a fluffer, he should just get his ex mother in law, she is great at attempting to make something out of nothing and not succeeding. Suh-nap
Secret Story Time
wrote on November 5 2009 @ 04:08 pm: [report]
My guess is that his PENIS is UP to the task at hand.
Secretia
equnsuocha
wrote on November 5 2009 @ 04:21 pm: [report]
@ECM awesome!
I have to say I love this lil SOB. I can’t wait until he spills it all. This is what you get when you advocate abstinence only teaching and force yourself and your knocked up teenage daughter into the public spotlight. I feel for Bristol but sometimes in a war against stupid there is collateral damage. Go Levi!!
PS I really think he should keep his pecker in his pants though
bogart4017
wrote on November 6 2009 @ 02:45 pm: [report]
You know what they say—Don’t go near the water if you can’t swim the tide.