Is It True Men Just Want Sex?

shoeluvher
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 07:05 am: [report]

I’m inclined to disagree with this being that in my relationships I tend to be the one who wants sex more. Maybe its just me though…

develange
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 07:29 am: [report]

I also disagree. Whenever I think I’m getting “just sex no strings attached,” the guy wants to move it to the next level. Maybe it’s all just a ploy, though.

Emi
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 07:47 am: [report]

Yup, I want more sex then my boyfriend too.

_jsw_
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 08:15 am: [report]

As with many stereotypes, there’s a grain of truth here. Men do tend to have more of an urge for being with multiple partners, and men tend to be more able to have short flings without any adverse emotional effects. When sizing up partners, I think men might pay more attention to physical attributes than women do, and women probably pay more attention to other aspects.

However, as with all tendencies and stereotypes, this means nothing on an individual basis. And, in the end, as the referenced article states, these urges compete with many other desires and influences.

raqueleza
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 08:18 am: [report]

This is the most inane, inconsequential article on so many levels…why the Frisky would post it is completely beyond me.

And the author’s bio actually says “fairy tales really do come true.” For God’s sake.

DancerNinja
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 08:30 am: [report]

That examiner article was absolutely useless.

_jsw_
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 08:34 am: [report]

@raqueleza: Yes, it’s a bit of a puff piece, but I think TF often posts things for the discussion they might engender, and this article might be one of those that acquires a long comment list (or not). I don’t think it’s more inane or inconsequential than many of the articles here, and I enjoy the mix of serious and less serious ones. Also, yes, her bio does say that about fairy tales, but in the context of what’s also in the bio, I don’t think it’s out of place. I don’t think she literally believes in Cinderella or Snow White or the Golden Goose.

_jsw_
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 08:37 am: [report]

@DancerNinja: I disagree. I thought the hominid picture was adorable. And come on, who can watch the Animals Mating video below it without the catchy song getting stuck in their head?

lostrun
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 10:48 am: [report]

I think this piece is a bad puff piece.  The part that got me was the “women have an instinct to have children.”  Like _jsw_ said, it is a stereotype, but I’m still a bit miffed about it.  Maybe it’s b/c I’m tired of hearing that though I don’t want them now, I’ll want them later on, and this just reinforces that idea.

wild-ting
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 12:26 pm: [report]

I didn’t even click the continue reading link after I read this bullsh*t:

“...as women have an instinct to have children, just like the primates who came before us.”

Maybe if I had the article would have eventually read PSYCH!

_jsw_
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 12:32 pm: [report]

We do have the instinct to have sex, but no one has the “instinct” to have children. The instinct is for the behavior, not the consequence. I do find it interesting that the primates before us had the instinct to have children, since, by definition, children are human. Must’ve led to some pretty damned frustrated primates.

Gingee
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 05:07 pm: [report]

Women do NOT have any instict to breed.  No one has that instinct. 

As for what women want:  Not all women want the same thing.

This article was poorly thought out.

Gingee

Tubal Ligation at age 22, and half of a Childfree by Choice couple

retro chic
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 06:26 pm: [report]

Relax, guys… a puff piece at least attempts to flatter its subject… those leapfrogging chimps? Not so flattering. Otherwise, this has to be the lost episode of Seinfeld, “The Post About Nothing.” Is just harmless weekend filler.

OK, I’ll bite. We shouldn’t confuse conscious human Desire with unconscious animal Instinct. Humans make choices, animals do not. That’s why there’s Birth Control, not Instinct Control.

Isn’t our instinct for Life and survival? I’m mostly sure that can only be accomplished thru children, ie, Extinction Control. The instinct that forms the human Desire for the sexual behavior that results in children that guarantees our survival is just a wee evolutionary technical detail. Or, we’d be sitting in the nonexistent Anthro professor’s drawer by now.

landesign
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 07:23 pm: [report]

Nuff said.

Shasta
wrote on July 12 2009 @ 09:37 pm: [report]

@Editors of the Frisky -

Examiner articles have always been weak. Frisky original content may be puffy, but it’s always insightful and well-written.  John DeVore, Wendy, Amelia, Annika are great Frisky writers.  These Examiner folk think that because they can string a few sentences together they’re the next Carrie Bradshaw.

Pick a different site to post from.

And I didn’t need to see the Monkeys or the Hominid people.

Ick.

Frederica Bimble
wrote on July 13 2009 @ 05:47 am: [report]

Devalange:  I know exactly what you mean.  As soon as I make it clear that I was just wanting to have sex, magically these same guys will ask “can I call you again?”  or “I’d like to get together again.”  My answer would always be:  “Er, no, I clearly said I wasn’t looking for anything and having sex with you again would be leading to something.”  A “one night stand” is just that:  “a one night stand”  this is assuming the only reason they’re asking is for another night of sex.  Let it be me who asks to “see them again” and that old chestnut:  “I wasn’t actually looking for anything” comes rolling out.  My answer to that?  “Sweetie, no one asked you for anything.”  Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

Also, for some reason, I have the ability to say before the event:  “I’m not looking for anything” but I have yet to meet the man who doesn’t wait until after the fact.  It is tacky, you know. I’ve been called “rude” in the past because I tell people straight up what I think or feel.  I find it truly vulgar for a man to try to “convince” a woman to have sex with him by false flattery or pursuing her and then knowing all along, it was just a “game” to them, to let the person they’ve just had sex with know after the deed that they “weren’t looking for anything.” 

What’s a woman to do?  We have needs and hey, who knows, that person we’re sharing our bodies with may just be that person we’d like to spend some real time with so why does Western society expect women to pretend not to like sex in order to have some man “court” them and then wait until a “respectable” time to have sex with them.  Women can separate emotion and sex but I often wonder if men can actually do that.  If you have to make up a lie by saying “I wasn’t looking for anything” then who are you really kidding? 

I, at the age of 40 am now trying these techniques to “get a man”.  Sure, I can pretend I don’t want sex so the man will “stick around” but what happens when he ends up being unsatisfactory in bed?  Men go on about how you shouldn’t try to “change them” yet women are expected to waste a few dates, months or (insert ridiculous time span) in order to keep a man who may turn out to be lousy in bed. 

We’re not in the dark ages anymore.  As for the article, just silly, really and it prompts me to ask “how old is the writer?”  Someone of little experience, regardless of their age.

Gingee
wrote on July 13 2009 @ 09:54 am: [report]

Hurrah to Frederica Bimble:

That is the best approach:  Telling the dude that you want to exchange goods and services for goods and services.

If he is Any Good, and is rational, he won’t mind.

“What’s a woman to do?”

What I did:  Got my Cha-Cha lined up.  Every happy
single gal has their Cha-Cha, the man you call when you want only Good Sex.

bogart4017
wrote on July 13 2009 @ 11:05 am: [report]

Frederica: Yeay!!! I can appreciate a woman who is going to be honest and just straight up say “satisfy me sexually and then get the hell out”. I’ve only had one like that and it was THE BEST sex i had in years.

Gingee
wrote on July 13 2009 @ 11:20 am: [report]

You lucky fella:

What I proposed to one guy: That I stop at his house, do him, and be on my way, no strings attached. No sleepover.

He declined. We’re still friends, but he’s one of those who needs a lot of romancing.  TMW:  Too Much Work.