Hugh Hefner Can’t Tell His New Twins Apart

At a recent Playmate of the Year party, Hugh Hefner fessed up that he can’t actually tell his new twin girlfriends, Kristina and Karissa Shannon, apart. “I have one little trick, one has a little mark,” he said, motioning to his neck. “Other than that, I don’t know.” It sounds like that’s not the only thing Hef didn’t know. Both of these twins also have an arrest record. Oops.

To be honest Hef, we can’t tell them apart either. I never thought I would care, but I kinda miss the old “Girls Next Door” with their adorable quirks and distinct personalities. A friend of mine was at the mansion earlier this month and said Hef looked miserable. Maybe he misses Holly Madison? But then again, Hef didn’t ask our opinion. After the jump, a run-down on Kristina and Karissa.

• Kristina and Karissa are 20-year-old identical twins from Tampa, Florida. They will be Playboy‘s Miss July (Karissa) and Miss August (Kristina) this year, sharing the honors a special double issue. The two became Hef’s girlfriends late last year, after Kendra Wilkinson and Bridget Marquardt moved out of the Playboy Mansion. Around the same time, Crystal Harris replaced Holly Madison as his “head” girlfriend. You know, the one he shares a bed with.
• In January 2008, both girls were charged with aggravated assault after getting into a fight at a house party in St. Petersburg, Florida. Karissa was also arrested with a misdemeanor battery charge in November 2007, after beating one of her colleagues with a beer bottle while working as a waitress at “Wing House.” [Daily Mail] — If the relationships fail, Hef could always take the girls on as security.
• The Shannon sisters aren’t Hefner’s first set of twins. He also dated Sandy and Mandy Bentley in 2000. [Daily News] — No news on whether he beds both twins at once, but isn’t that the fantasy? Weird incestuous twin threesome sex?
• Though little is known about the girls, their MySpace profiles offer a glimpse into their personalities. Karissa says, “Obstacles r put into your life to see if wut u want is worth fighting for!!!” From this information, we know that she can’t spell. Meanwhile, Kristina expounds, “Love me without fear. Trust me without wondering. Love me without restrictions. Want me without demands. Accept me how I am. A love like that will be ETERNAL!” Which means she is needy and creepy. [Daily News]
• Holly Madison was heartbroken after she realized Hef would never settle down with her. But she still shows support (kinda) for his new Playboy posse. “I would never try to personally pick Hef’s new girlfriend,” she told Us Weekly. “I would like him to take his time and actually get to know somebody—which he never does! But as long as he’s having fun, I’m happy for him!” [UsMagazine]

Hopefully, the tough twins take it easy on Hef, ‘cause who knows how many more seasons he can pitch (tent) in.