Girl Talk: Why I Love My Gray Hair
Posted by: Gillian Holmes
Filed in:
style
8:00AM, Sunday January 25th 2009
My first gray hairs were cause for celebration. My mother, politically liberal, but parentally strict, had forbidden me from coloring my hair “until you start going gray.” So when, at 14, I was able to show her a few silver hairs buried in my thick black mop, I was overjoyed. And, God bless her, she took me straight to the store for the box of burgundy dye that was the obsession of adolescent girls (thanks to Angela on “My So Called Life” of course). By the end of high school, I had grown out a Bonnie Raitt-like gray streak on one side.
I chose to part my hair where the gray grew out the thickest, featuring my unique highlights like a peacock feather. During college, I enjoyed my silvering hair, I think because I never associated it with aging, at least, not in the negative, “beginning the march toward death,” sense.
Then for several years, I colored my hair, and now at 28, I am letting it grow in as is, almost completely white. Last year, when I told my stylist not to touch up my roots, she refused, preparing the bottle of black dye anyway, threatening me with the word “hag.” I got a new stylist.
Many associate prematurely gray hair with severe stress or trauma, as though, from an overabundance of life experience, follicles just give up on the whole pigment thing. The truth is that gray hair is genetic; it can’t be brought on by stress, trauma, or insomnia. I have prematurely grayed because my grandparents on both sides did, too. However, as a young, suburban Midwestern writer trying to make it in a variety of “big cities”—Melbourne, New York, Paris—I have always enjoyed the former association. I like the idea that others see me as quietly and courageously living through a tragedy, like a heroine in a country song.
(Coincidentally, the only woman I have found to look to as an example of dove-haired beauty is country singer Emmylou Harris. Her silver first appeared on the cover of her 1977 album Luxury Liner, when she was just 30.)
These days, most who comment on my hair compare me to the sexy, leather-clad character Rogue of the “X-Men” movies, and I never disabuse anyone of the notion that I am a superhero.
My bad-ass world-saving name? Silver Fox, of course.
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Pipi
wrote on January 25 2009 @ 09:53 am: [report]
I have vitiligo which is a pigment disease that caused me to have one or two gray eyelashes in elementary school. And I have had patches of gray hair since maybe around the age of 10.My hair is blond so many people just think the hairs are super white blond which is cool and all but I wish my whole head would turn gray.
ragnbonebroke
wrote on January 25 2009 @ 11:47 am: [report]
Wow, I have the exact same story… a few gray hairs at 14, now I’m in college and I have the streak on one side. At least I know what’s coming. I’m actually looking forward to going all gray
Lynn
wrote on January 25 2009 @ 01:29 pm: [report]
I’ve had a big chunk of grey hair in the back of my head since I was 13. You can’t tell now, because I dye my hair, but before I dyed it you could see it when I put my hair up in a ponytail.
But, if I were you I would make sure it’s not a medical thing. When my mom noticed my grey chunk, she marched me to the doctor to make sure I didn’t have a thyroid problem, because it can be a sign of that.
Amelia
wrote on January 25 2009 @ 01:32 pm: [report]
You know who rocks a sweet gray streak sometimes? Stacy London, one of the hosts of “What Not To Wear.” I’m not sure if it’s natural and she sometimes dyes it dark, or if she makes it gray as a style statement on occasion, but regardless, she rocks it as I’m sure you do as well!
chloe
wrote on January 25 2009 @ 09:41 pm: [report]
my mom has had white bangs since high school, while the rest of her hair is black. my grandmother had the same deal, but it seems to have skipped my generation. i wish it didnt!
KellyJean
wrote on January 26 2009 @ 06:54 am: [report]
*sigh* I’ve been graying since high school, and at 28, I’m at least 50%. I haven’t stopped dying since the first ones came in at 15 (and probably got the same burgundy you did!) I’ve tried to stop, but I can’t get used to people telling be that I’m “graying early” each time the roots show. Do you think I DON’T know?!? Ha! I should stop dying, and then there’s be 2 of us: Young, sassy, and naturally highlighted!
Seriously?
wrote on January 28 2009 @ 08:58 pm: [report]
I started going gray at around sixteen…well, that’s when I first noticed. I inherited it from my father’s side.
I am now in my 30’s and have more gray than black. I am constantly asked where I get my hair done. People do not believe that I am naturally gray. My gray is in chunks, so it looks like highlights.
I do have to say, my mother is always trying to convince me to color my hair. But, I am proud of it. I wouldn’t be me if I did otherwise.
LaGiulia
wrote on February 1 2009 @ 02:41 pm: [report]
I got my first gray hairs at 28 (I found one in my bangs the day George W. Bush won his first election - doubly depressing). I’m 36 now, and dye my hair religiously. I often catch myself thinking about letting it all go. You know, own my gray hair. I guess having a younger partner doesn’t help
janetc20
wrote on September 15 2009 @ 10:22 am: [report]
Great post! Last night I got the last inch of the color-treated portion of my hair trimmed off so I am now 100% my natural color. That natural color is red, brown and silver—you know, the multi-tonal thing they talk about in the hair color commercials!
I wanted to stop dying my hair before I had to make a choice between “growing out the white stripe” (painful!) and dying my hair until I die.
I encourage everyone to let their hair be what it is—hey, men do it! Why the heck not women?
PS—people with dyed hair do not automatically look younger. People with a youthful style, a fit body, and a good attitude look younger.
samanthaf
wrote on September 16 2009 @ 07:36 am: [report]
I got my first gray hair at 9. My mother used to pull them out until there were too many… Premature gray from my father’s side; my paternal grandmother was silver gray at 18. So salt and pepper for me until late 20’s and mostly silver with a few black strands since then. I’m 51 and still get a lot of complements on the color. Most women who comment say they wish theirs was that color or would go completely white so they didn’t have to color their hair. Enjoy it!
Alli
wrote on December 16 2009 @ 06:49 pm: [report]
The same thing happened to me! My mom finally let me dye my hair for the first time when I was 14 and started sprouting gray hairs right on the top of my head. Now I’m 23, and for some reason (or some gift from god) they haven’t moved anywhere else. Now I rock the gray streak similar to the one that Stacy London has and I absolutely love it!!