Genius Idea: Divorce Registries
Posted by: Amelia McDonell-Parry
Filed in:
relationships
2:00PM, Monday October 20th 2008
It’s no secret that those in charge of deciding what and who deserves a holiday, the legal system, the government, and even the universe has something against single people. That explains why people getting married get to register for whatever expensive crap they want and people actually buy it for them—because we’ve been inudated since birth with the knowledge that people who are in love DESERVE PRESENTS.
Well, I’m here to say, that’s B.S. Why don’t we have divorce registries? And parties for people who have just been dumped and no longer have pots and pans because they’re crummy ex took them when he moved out? I got lost four times driving to Ikea this weekend because the ex took our (okay, his) dresser so I needed a new one. I didn’t end up buying a dresser, however, because A) the box weighed 300 pounds and I’m too pathetically weak to carry it and B) I don’t have a second person to help me put furniture together anymore anyway. I did come home with candles, wine glasses, and picture frames.
The point is, couples are celebrated. But what if one half of the couple decides to be a doofus and takes off—with half of the couple’s stuff? It seems to me that there’s no better time for gifts than when you’re depressed. I think there should be divorce and breakup registries so that people can reacquire the things they’ve lost in the split. Like those pots and pans I mentioned. I had to cook dinner in these weird metals bowls last night. It was a total fire hazard.
TheFrisky.com is part of the Turner Sports and Entertainment Digital Network
Constance
wrote on October 20 2008 @ 06:31 pm: [report]
I completely agree! Not only for scumbags that leave you with nothing, but what about people that have to leave in a hurry, and can’t take anything with them? I slept on the floor for a month after I left my husband b/c I left in 4 hours while he was at work, and had no bed or couch or anything.
toyen
wrote on October 20 2008 @ 07:16 pm: [report]
Oh, if only we could make this happen. I need a towel rack, a new favorite lamp for the bedroom, and ice cube trays. That bastard took ice cube trays!
toyen
wrote on October 20 2008 @ 07:19 pm: [report]
I must be in the anger part of relationship grief. Heh. I was so passionate, I hit submit prematurely!
As is, those candles and wine glasses will serve you well. My friends always seem to come bearing the 1.5 liter bottle of wine post break-up for me… that’s gift enough, I guess, though the hangover that goes with it is not.
Amelia
wrote on October 20 2008 @ 07:26 pm: [report]
I really think this could be my get rich quick scheme. DivorceRegistry.com appears to be available!
toyen
wrote on October 20 2008 @ 07:29 pm: [report]
Do it! You’ve got the skills! I can hope with web programming…
Simosa
wrote on October 20 2008 @ 07:42 pm: [report]
hola. you can’t publish that and not buy it.
Amelia
wrote on October 20 2008 @ 08:00 pm: [report]
This is embarrassing. I only know how to write for the web. How do I buy a domain name?!
xcmgxRobin
wrote on October 20 2008 @ 10:30 pm: [report]
This is the best idea I’ve heard in a long time! And SL, your enthusiasm makes me smile. I’m right there with you, drinking the wine and cringing at the hangover!
DrB
wrote on October 22 2008 @ 07:28 am: [report]
But, um…your idea really doesn’t apply to singles per se. Being in a couple is still necessary—no couple, no divorce. So now I, unattached all my life, would not only be obliged to give gifts at the cementing of a couple, but at the dissolution of one, too? OK, fine, but only if there’s some event that allows us genuine singles to claim gifts from the rest of you.
Angela
wrote on October 22 2008 @ 01:29 pm: [report]
So let me see if I have this correct as to what YOU want…
you got tons of #&@$% from people at your bridal shower. Then you got more #&@$% from people at the wedding. Then some who chose to have kids, get even more #&@$% from people at the baby shower. Now you want more #&@$% from the “people” because your marriage didn’t work out!
That’s a lot of #&@$%!
Amelia
wrote on October 22 2008 @ 01:37 pm: [report]
@Angela Well, this applies to couples who are just cohabiting not just married and getting divorced. The cohabiting people haven’t gotte #### from anyone!
Angela
wrote on October 22 2008 @ 02:03 pm: [report]
My mistake…your idea is called “Divorce Registries”
You can’t have a divorce without a marriage.
Maybe call it “Break-up Registries”.
Note: never a good idea to move in with your significant other without a legal commitment.
Always be able to take care and support yourself, you will never be in the position to need anything from anyone. Then one day you will get a gift from a friend and it will be true, not pity.
Lindsay Goldenberg
wrote on October 22 2008 @ 02:05 pm: [report]
Go to http://www.godaddy.com and buy it!!