Fathers Have Bigger Influence Over Women's Career Choices

Father Knows Best: More Women Are Following In Dad’s Footsteps

Posted by: Amelia McDonell-Parry Filed in: relationships
1:00PM, Friday February 27th 2009

As we’ve written about before, fathers have a profound influence over their daughters, especially when it comes to relationships. Many people believe that women either seek out partners that are a lot like their dads or as different from them as can be. But two new studies reveal that women are actually more influenced by their fathers than their mothers when it comes to choosing their career paths.

The University of Maryland studied the career choices among women born between 1909 and 1977 and discovered that 18 percent of women born in the final decade of the study pursued the same career their father, compared with 6 percent of those born in the first decade. Another study, this one conducted by Peggy Drexel, an assistant professor of psychology at Cornell, comes to the same conclusion—that women are more likely to go down the same career path as their fathers than their mothers—but sees it as a negative that comes as the result of fathers always being viewed as “the patient teacher(s)” and “the daughter(s) the wide-eyed apprentice.” She writes on The Huffington Post:

“What happens to time-calibrated roles when a daughter has to make life choices that are a bit more complex, personal and lasting…? ... For many high-achieving women in my study of the changing relationship between daughters and fathers, the transition can be difficult. They find themselves walking the often thread-thin divide between contribution and control. Some maintain their equilibrium, others don’t. Without the precise balance of contribution and independence, however, women may find—instead of a pathway to the benefits of experience—a constriction that cuts off the oxygen to their own plans and dreams.”

In other words, fathers end up having a TOO big influence over what their daughters end up pursuing as adults, often sidelining their own aspirations in order to please.

Judy Berman at Salon.com disagrees. She thinks that both studies indicate that in the last few decades that yes, dads have a big influence over their daughters (and children in general), but that’s because they’ve also just become far more active as parents then in previous generations, when the mother was often the main parental influence and role model. Couple that with the women’s movement, a lot more women joining the work force, and women aspiring for the same high-ranking positions as men, as the numbers are bound to go up.

“Sure, this also means more pressure and criticism for daughters from the kinds of fathers who have always pressured and criticized their sons. But it also means more support and guidance for daughters from the kinds of fathers who have always supported and guided their sons.”

I’m more apt to agree with Berman on this issue than Drexel, though I think my own personal experience, and the way I grew up and was raised, doesn’t necessarily fit the mold of this study. Both my parents worked full-time jobs, but in creative and academic fields. My father (he’s retired now) was an administrator in the writing department at a university, while my mom taught English as a Second Language (ESL) to refugees and immigrants. But both of them have passions outside their day jobs that I think define them, career-wise, just as much—my dad is a writer and my mom is a painter. I was always encouraged to pursue my creative interests and as a result I was very interested in both becoming a writer (and, in fact, wrote a book when I was 12) and an artist (I studied photography and art in high school and college). Eventually, I had to make a choice—writer, artist, or something else entirely? I ended up going with writing, not because my dad had a bigger impact on my choices than my mom, but because, frankly, I was a MUCH better writer than artist. Seriously, couldn’t draw a straight line (though I did take decent photos). Plus, in the end, I enjoyed writing more.

Still, my parents were never pushy or pressuring or critical, except in that they always encouraged me to follow my dreams. If anything, they might have been critical if I was considering a less creative path—like finance—as they clearly believed, and raised me to believe, that offering some creative to the world was a far more precious and valuable pursuit. In the end though, I strongly agree with Berman that these studies do show that dads are now more active in their daughters’ lives and are encouraging them to break through traditional gender roles. And that’s a great thing.

comments

par3
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 01:18 pm: [report]

i’ve realized it’s bc it’s not really about WHAT you know anymore…but WHO you know. since hooking up with some of my dad’s contacts it’s been easier to form business relationships and i’ve even been able to start my own investment company that works overseas… i’m 23! no shame in using your resources!

Pipi
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 01:18 pm: [report]

I think this is more of a thing where women are now able to have jobs that were once “men’s work”. My dad does construction and um although I am pretty handy, I dont think I will be bending over with plumbers crack and a hammer in my hand anytime soon.

par3
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 01:25 pm: [report]

+ also i would like to add that my dad never treated me like i was a ‘girl who did girl stuff’... he never placed gender boundaries that his generation lived by- on me. which is crazy considering we’re immigrants from eastern europe where women are still really oppressed as far as jobs, business and careers. since coming back to eastern eu to do business- it’s been hard to get respect form some…well most…of the men i work with. thankfully, i have a really sharp tongue and a no-#&@$% attitude (also got that from my dad) and they know they can’t eff with me. i always get the ‘you’re a pretty lady but i couldn’t stand you if you were my wife’... i just roll my eyes- chauvinistic cumtwats- but i take their money so it’s all good

Humble Bee
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 02:02 pm: [report]

I completely agree, my dad is like my personal counselor, he has helped me better myself and become tough, never let anyone walk over me, and has helped me analyze things that I had never even opened my eyes to. The thing about him, is that he lets me make mistake and is always there to pick me up and never let that happen again. I am a very independent person becase of all the advice he has given me, its funny because my mom is the business woman while my dad is the more asrty stay at home dad. He has helped me pave my own path of success, and follow in my own footsteps and not in anyone elses. BUT the bad part is that he has taught me to be so independant that its hard for me to find a person i feel up to “par” with.. I feel like i expect too much out of my mate sometimes. The thing I look for the most in guys is, they dont have to go school, they dont have to have a hot shot job, but they DO have to be working somehow towards their dreams and a lot of the time, these chumps don’t even have one, or atleast a big goal they are trying to accomplish for themselves. I know I have many aspirations….

writergirl
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 02:13 pm: [report]

My father would have PAID me not to follow in his footsteps. He was a computer programmer—at the start of his career, anyway—and I can’t do math.

That being said, I did marry someone almost exactly like him, down to the job description.

par3
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 02:32 pm: [report]

writergirl- Oedipus complex! as much as my dad gets on my nerves when Mr.Par3 makes a dad-move it makes me smile and get all knot in the throat-y. it’s kind of like reassuring that someone will always have a dad-like quality around me. ex: when i trip or hit my head or do something clumsy- they have the EXACT same reaction- the eye rolling ‘bravo’. mean but it’s so distinct!

retro chic
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 03:45 pm: [report]

Woulda like to have followed dad’s footsteps in the space program. But there are those days when he STILL reminds me to change the oil. Then I grit and say (with the sound off), “To the moon, A%&@#*e…”

sailor_girl
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 07:38 pm: [report]

I didn’t necessarily follow in my fathers footsteps but in those of my grandfathers. Joining the military has been one of the most rewarding experiences. I think the military is one of the best examples that women can do anything.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on February 28 2009 @ 01:57 am: [report]

@retro chic Are those stars in your eyes, because you’re out of this world.

This post doesn’t apply to me, I just want to be a goof.

Sabina
wrote on February 28 2009 @ 10:57 am: [report]

par3
wrote on February 27 2009 @ 03:32 pm:
[ignore]
[report]

Honestly, most of my ex-boyfriends have the same traits as my dad does. It’s not even traits it’s like a copy and paste sentence! I would say that it’s true that Dad do have a big influence in my relationship.

I never fell for the Mr. Harvard graduate with a high-end salary who drives a regular car to save energy.

I went for the Mr. college-drop-out with sweet words, fancy cars, and is street wise.

No doubt I love my dad he’s the best ever but yeah what’s up with this whole influence thing!

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