Adult Entertainment Expo

Dispatches From The Adult Entertainment Expo

Posted by: Anna David Filed in: sex
11:30AM, Wednesday January 14th 2009

After a few days—or even a few minutes—at the Adult Entertainment Expo, your brain begins to process things differently than it did previously. Breasts covered by clothing seem unusual, almost confusing. Loud moans emanate from adult movies on view at various booths and orgasm contests at others. Since this was my third year, I’m relatively unshockable. Which means that I was able to look past dildos as thick as forearms, girls grinding each other, and a bald man in a black suit who claimed to have equipment that dwarfed John Holmes to determine the best of what the world’s biggest sex convention had to offer.

Early on in my exploration, I was introduced to El Dorado’s Sexerciseme ball (ElDorado.net). It’s like those medicine balls that people who are more devoted to their abs than I am do crunches on in the gym. But this one provides something Equinox never would: a dildo attachment for post-workout pleasure. Other attachment options include butt plugs and rabbit vibrators. Wholesale price: $39.75 for the ball, plus an additional $55.75 for the rabbit attachment.
For Whole Foods devotees, Intimate Organics has entire line of gels and sprays devoted to improving your sex life in the most organic way possible. Products include anal relaxing cream for men and women; although, there was no word on what the difference was between the two.
On the more extreme end of sex toys, there was an ejaculating dildo that its proud inventor explained cavalierly was for “come fetishists.” Although he gave me the wrong URL for the product’s website, careful detective work on my part—that is, correctly guessing there probably weren’t a lot of sites that contained the word ejaxxulator—led me to the right one, which is ... coming soon.
For those interested in more standard fare—like having sex with another person instead of an inanimate object—there was the blowguard (available at BlowGuard.com). For $27.95, it promises to “take the ‘job’ out of blow jobs.” Basically, it’s a dental dam with a bullet attachment, which I have to admit is kind of an ingenious concept. Safe oral sex + bite free = why didn’t someone think of this before?

The We-Vibe’s Clitoral & G-Spot Vibrator (We-Vibe.com) won an Erotic Line award in 2008 (apparently, this is no small deal in the porn world). You put one end of the C-shaped silicone product inside you, leave the other end on top, and turn it on. Then, you have sex. The company claims that ladies can wear it while “walking around” because “it will always try to stay nestled into the woman’s erogenous zone.”
At other booths, a “G-spot doctor” offered “enhancement procedures,” a woman in a latex tuxedo showed off Liquid Latex Fashions, a school advertised classes on how to gain entry into the porn business (AdultVideoAcademy.com), and Nearly Me Technologies (TGTransforms.com) offered products designed to transform men into women and vice versa.

comments

Hanners
wrote on January 14 2009 @ 12:50 pm: [report]

You’d be amazed at how fast you can become desensitized to “adult products”, if you will. As a member of the internet generation, I’m, to make a bad pun, intimately familiar with all kinds of sex, sex toys, and so forth, but nothing tested my desensitization to sex like the months where my mother worked at our local porn/sex novelty shop and came home to debate the design merits of bullet vibrators and the social repercussions of Two Girls, One Cup. I think after that I could set up some bunk beds in the middle of the Adult Entertainment Expo and roast marshmallows and be totally nonplussed by the whole thing.

peaches2009
wrote on January 14 2009 @ 02:29 pm: [report]

My husband and I just purchased the Blow Guard (thebasictouch.com - $24.95) and it is terrific. The Blow Guard is comfortable and easy to use. After I was done, my husband tried it on me and…WOW! He said he had to bite down a bit to keep it from moving around but I didn’t have that problem at all. As a matter of fact, I think it made it much easier to give oral. This is a must have for any bedroom toy collection.

forbidden1
wrote on January 15 2009 @ 02:47 pm: [report]

hey Anna, Deepak here from http://www.theejaxxulator.com!!! sorry i gave you the incorrect site at the show!!!

a_jack_with_one_eye
wrote on January 19 2009 @ 05:41 pm: [report]

i think society has just been desensitized by sex as a whole. i have to admit, if i were to see a dildo exercise ball rolling down the street covered in anal relaxing cream, i’d probably just grab it by the rabbit attachment and just roll it back to its owner without even blinking or washing my hands.

timdub70
wrote on January 19 2009 @ 05:49 pm: [report]

An erotic exercise ball. What next, an erotic gym to put it in? For your physical and sexual fitness.

Prototype
wrote on January 20 2009 @ 04:28 am: [report]

It is amazing how advanced technology is these days and how integrated they are within the industry to produce these “creative” products. However, at the same time it is sad. Sad as in it goes to show you how lonely people are these days that they must resort to investing in these products, especially the older people. I mean, I’m pretty sure I’ve probably had more action in my car (which is only 5 years old this month) than those people in their whole lives!

Oh yeah, and just so everyone knows, all those “natural herbal” products and other “extracts” are bogus. Not that I’ve ever used them or anything, but there hasn’t been any extensive, reliable, medical research that proves that they work or do what they claim to do. The only thing they really do is just mess with your blood flow here and there but that’s it. The side effects far outweigh the benefits, so don’t bother. Until someone finds a valid, credible scientific article that has been widely published, I stand by my words. Just throwing this out there. Too much scams going on.

jesscdoo
wrote on January 30 2009 @ 12:29 am: [report]

Hey, Prototype, not to be offensive or anything but…f*ck you! Using toys doesn’t make me “sad,” it makes me courageous! Why, you ask? Well, I’ll tell you! I’m a childhood sexual abuse survivor (as I mentioned on another post) and I have a very difficult time achieving orgasm without a vibrator. I have read extensively on this subject and apparently, sometimes the body and mind work in tandem to protect previous victims from past pain and the result is that response to “regular” sex becomes problematic, if not impossible. Luckily, my huisband is not threatened in any way and happily participates in whatever form of sex we find enjoyable.

Please show a little more respect for others by not being so ignorant.

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